The Fishbone and the Firelily
by BellatrixLestrangey
Summary: In her anger, Azula sought to destroy the heart of the spirit energy in the Forgetful Valley. Its guardian afflicts her with a curse that can only be broken by forming a genuine bond with someone. This fic will contain some graphic content.
1. A Heart That Won't Rupture

Azula entered the cave with nefarious intent. The valley, the jungle, and the spirits in it have all wronged her. They kept her from her goal, they had stopped her from bringing her mother and brother down once and for all, and now they were going to pay. All of them were going to pay.

She could see it glowing. The heart of the Forgetful Valley, deep at the bottom of the cave's pool.

The spirits thought that they'd hidden it so well, in a place so high in the mountains that no one could reach it. But they didn't account for someone like her. Someone with determination and the poweress to make it happen.

She slid one hand along the cool, wet wall and held in her other, a sputtering blue flame. The cave breathed a moist and musk air over her face but she was not deterred.

With a truly wicked grin, Azula sauntered over to the water.

Water that was so still and probably had been for decades, maybe longer. It was practically asking her to unsettle it. Below, she could now clearly see the thing emitting the purple glow. Indeed it looked like a heart, one of the largest she'd ever seen. To it clung a host of barnacles, urchins, and corals. She could even make out a few tiny bioluminescent fish swirling about. Upon closer inspection Azula noticed the heart's veins half-buried by sand. They seemed to have fused with the stone, gradually blending from one material to the next. She almost didn't want to go through with her vengeance. She however, let her fire die out to make room for her dagger, leaving her alone in the dark with only the weak purple glow of the heart. And with an angry howl, sh plunged her dagger beneath the surface and jammed it into the pulsating heart at the bottom.

She expected for the organ to bust and for the cave to go dark. She expected a whoop of pain from the spirits within and outside of the cave. She expected to hear a great cry and to the jungle moan out its death wail.

But instead she sat there panting heavily with frenzied adrenaline in the soft purple glow, her dagger still in hand—now dripping—catching the only light. Her breathing gradually slowed and she was left in complete and horrible silence. She thought to take another strike but found herself at an odd loss of energy. From her knife a small puddle of water was forming. It trailed down the cave floor where it soaked into the cloth of Azula's pants at the kneecap. She shifted in discomfort away from the water. Her mind was numb, she couldn't fathom why it didn't work. This time she did take a second shot.

This time she was thrown back by the water.

Her head connected with the cave wall, leaving her both dazed and terrified all at once. The water twisted and bended and finally took shape. Azula sat herself up and held a hand to her pulsing head. The impact had broken skin. Her blood warmly slipped between her fingers. She uttered a pained wince and at last, looked up. A lion-vulture made of water stood before her on two legs. If she had to fight it to get to the heart, so be it.

Azula rose, despite everything willing her not to. She dropped the dagger and tossed a ball of fire in the direction of the spirt. It opened a hole in its belly and let the flame pass through before closing it up again. In retaliation it tossed her into the wall again, this time her back took the brunt of the blow. She fell upon her hands and knees and stopped to retrieve her breath. She stood again, narrowing her eyes at the beast. It wasn't a spirit at all she realized, it was a decoy.

"Come out and give me a real fight." She demanded to the darkness.

"I don't think you want that." Came her answer.

"I do." She replied. "More than anything."

Azula watched the water retreat back to its rightful place and refill the hole. There was a distinct crack as something peeled only half of itself from the cave wall. Exactly what had done so, Azula couldn't tell. But she could make out something that could pass for a torso and a head. She also had some semblance of knowledge that it had been there for eons, always watching.

Always protecting.

It seemed to be made of rock, or had the rock simply grown to cover it? Whatever the case, the thing extended out a little further emitting a sound of rock scraping rock, and grabbed Azula's chin with elongated, spindly fingers. Fingers that had more strength than their appearance would let on. Azula winced again at the rough hold it had on her face. But she would do no more than that. Some two or three feet higher above her head, two glowing purple slits opened. She had judged right; one of the somethings was a head. A third, wider, more zigzagged slit opened, "what should I do to you, princess?" Accompanied with a malevolent grin, the way the creature spat the title out, stripped it of any dignity that came with it. Somehow the cave spirit had turned such an elegant, beautiful title into a rotten, vile thing. She knew then that she had been in over her head.

He turned her head up so she could directly look him in the eye. "What? Should I do to you?" Still she gave him no answer. So, just as harshly as he had lifted her up, he threw her back to the floor. She remained there, on her back for a moment until the pain faded away enough for her to prop herself up on her forearms. The spirit would allow her no more room to do anything else. He shed himself further away from the wall and came down to look upon her. Under his glower she found herself shaking despite all intentions not to. "I imagine that you're the one who has been wreaking havoc on my beautiful jungle; burning sacred things, disturbing spirit pools, talking to spirits as if you have the right to. Humans are such ugly things."

Azula cringed at the accusations, knowing very well that almost none of them were wrong. But she did have the right, if anyone had the right to talk to and make demands of the spirits it was she, the princess, the rightful Fire Lord.

"You enjoy talking to spirits, so speak! Or do you only raise your voice when it's unwanted."

A million things came to mind, but she couldn't grasp one. She considered telling him to piss off and in the same heartbeat considered begging him to _please_ leave her alone. All at once she thought to deny his accusations and then she thought to just confess, "yes, I set you're ridiculous mangrove tree on fire." She parted hear lips to do so, but vocalized none.

"I see. I am correct."

"You aren't." She said at last.

"About which matter? Did you not cause my jungle strife or do you not speak when it's not asked of you?" The spirit questioned.

"I do not speak when it's unwanted. My opinion is always valued." Azula knew that, that was one of many wrong answers as soon as it left her lips. Then again, she felt as if everything she said would have been wrong. If she denied the accusations he'd scold her for lying. If she fessed up he'd have berated her for being too bold in a situation where even she knew that she had no right to be. If she boasted of her importance, he would her for arrogance. If she begged for forgiveness he would have told her that she didn't deserve it. And if she had kept quiet…God forbid she had kept quiet. Deep down she felt like that would have been the worst way to go.

Apparently, her response had tickled the spirit's humor for he was chuckling. She was relived and humiliated all at once; never had she had her status undermined like so. The moment was fleeting though, and he was back in her face scowling. "On the contrary, opinions from someone like yourself should be habitually disregarded."

Azula's face, previously red with embarrassment was now flushed with anger. As had become a horrible habit for her, she lashed out, striking the spirit in the head with a flurry of flame. She expected an immediate retaliation; a toss across the cave or a good smack on the cheek. Instead the spirit fixed her with a malicious smirk. "I know exactly what to do with you."

"You're going to kill me, aren't you." Azula resigned.

He stroked her cheek pseudo-tentatively. "Of course not. What kind of punishment is death? There are no lessons to be learned."

Azula's stomach churned, fear was finally setting in and much too late. Perhaps if it had set in earlier on she could have made herself out to be a lost, sympathetic soul.

"I can throw you around as much as I want. I can shatter your bones in many ways. I can strike you as much as I want, but you won't truly break. Will you?" The spirit didn't wait for an answer. "You're a human of unwavering pride. Unshakably arrogant and painfully self-righteous."

Azula felt the knots in her belly tighten with each truth. When thrown back in her face, it seemed so much worse than it was. Azula swallowed down the lump in her throat.

"That's what needs to be attacked, isn't it?" The spirit mused aloud. He came to loom over her again and pressed his pointer to her forehead. She could see something There came an awful burst of pain and she cried out. She could feel her face bursting, she had the strength to touch it, just to make sure it was just a sensation. But Agni, oh Agni she swore that it wasn't, for her hand came back sticky with blood and something quite foul smelling. Her face blistered, and in some place swell.

He wasn't going to make this easy for her, not at all.

The same sensation befell her arms and legs and then her stomach, from there it branched out until the agony was everywhere. Through the pain she wasn't aware of the shrieks tearing from her own throat. The worst of it was that she couldn't see what was happening to her. For all she knew it could have been an illusion. On her belly, erupted what felt like a rash. On her arm a few painful boils and welts. Azula couldn't be sure, but she could have sworn she wailed for him to make it stop, pleaded for it. Her speculation was confirmed when he answered, "see, you're swallowing your pride already." And like that, it was over. That was all he was waiting for. But the damage had been done. The pain fell mostly away, leaving in its wake only a dull throbbing.

A dull throbbing and an assortment of welts, swells, and bruises among other things.

But the spirit wasn't quite satisfied with his handiwork yet. He stooped down and propped her up against a stalagmite nearest to the pool in an uncannily caring manner. From his hand he ignited a flame of his own. "Go on. Look." It wasn't a suggestion. She hesitantly obeyed. Just like he had done to her title; he had warped something beautiful into a vile and rotten thing. She wasn't a complete mess of sores, welts, and blemishes but there was a generous amount of them. And the swelling—mostly around her eye and some on her lip, that was still painful to the touch. She looked away and drew her legs up to her chest.

"How's this?" The spirit asked. "I'm not a demon and I'm not, by nature, a wicked spirit. So I pose you an offer."

She tilted her head in his direction, not feeling up to doing much more than that.

"As I said punishments offer room to learn and grow, yes?" This time the spirit didn't try to coax a reaction. "We'll treat this as a…" he wracked his brain for a good word before settling on 'curse'. "If you can find someone who you love truly—it can be romantic or platonic—someone who you'd put before yourself, the pain will stop. You will be as you were."

"How dismal." Azula mustered.

The spirit, now fully detached from the wall, knelt down in front of her. "How about this, we'll make it easy." He waited for a moment. "He or she doesn't even have to love you back." He drummed his fingers atop her head. "Have we a deal?"

 _Easy_? She thought. _Easy_. A fresh sense of helplessness overtook her. She lowered herself back onto the ground, the more jagged of the rocks poked and prodded her left ribcage. "I suppose." She replied weakly.

"Then it is settled." He latched himself back onto the wall and began to meld back with it. "Oh, and one more thing; after you show yourself out, you are forbidden to come back for _any_ reason. Mercy doesn't come to those who test me a second time." The last thing to mold back into the wall was that cruel purple smile.

Azula lie on the floor looking like something fresh out of a plague town, weeping bitterly to herself. She had come to make them pay, so why was _she_ the one getting her comeuppance?


	2. Poisoned Veins

**My computer got a virus so I typed this via phone and edited it on tumblr in the text post section. Because of this the formatting might be odd and I don't have a word count. So apologies if this one is shorter or just not up to par with the first chapter.**

 **malcome reynolds: Thank you, I hope you continue to enjoy it this chapter. :)**

* * *

He saw a blur of trees and a scalding ray of light.

"Aang? Aang?" It sounded muffled and distant. Something intangible came after that.

He blinked twice little sparkles danced across his vision before growing into large sunspots. The voice came again, and he felt his body jerk twice. Black blotches rose into the corners of his field of vision. "Katara," he tried to mumble, though it sounded more like 'guahara'. His mouth felt puffy and tingly. The black blotches spanned out until there was nothing left of the blurred trees. Only a small bead of light pierced through the splotches, he tried with all of his energy to hold onto it. But it was getting further, or maybe he was falling backwards.

 **.oOo.**

"He's not good condition." The healer confirmed." The arrow was laced. Blackthorn and white jade bush, the combination is lethal, and with a touch of shredded leechy leaves is very slow acting. It can take months before he finally succumbs. Whoever did this wanted to prolong his suffering." He examined the arrow tip once again. "My word! Whoever did this must absolutely loath the child. See those black flecks?"

Katara peered over the man's shoulder and observed the liquid dripping from the arrowhead. At first all she saw was a slick shimmery sea green with a swirl of lavender and then she squinted. She saw it then, small, almost undetectable flakes of black. Like tiny onyx shavings that seemed to sap away all light around them. Katara had to confess the poison was darkly mesmerizing, if she didn't know any better she would have drank it under the impression that it would taste as lovely as it appeared.

"What is it?" Sokka asked before she could. She hadn't realized that he'd come to stand right beside her.

"Demon blood." The replies grimly. "As dangerous to the body and soul as it is alluring to the eye."

"So how do we help him?" Katara asked.

"Maybe we can go get some more water from the Spirit Oasis." Toph suggested.

"It takes more than that to combat demon blood. What you need to do is seek out the heart pool." The healer instructed.

"The heart pool?" Sokka asked.

"They say it's somewhere near Hira'a. In a place heavy with spirit energy." The healer replied. "According to the locals it gives life to the town. It's the source of most spirit activity in the Fire Nation."

"Okay but where is it in Hira'a?" Toph asked.

"Near Hira'a." He corrected. "To be frank, I'm not even sure that such a thing truly exists. I've sought the heart pool out for some time now and have found no such thing."

Katara squeezed Aang's hand "If there's even a chance to help him, we have to do it."

"I would imagine that you do. The world without an Avatar isn't a promising world." The healer agreed. He rummaged through a few shelves, knocking over empty vials, books, and other trinkets. He ignored the clatter of a crystal at his feet. At last he came upon a stack tattered pages. "Here is a list of all of the places I've explored. These are locations you can bypass, they have nothing of use. The last few pages are maps."

"Looks like we're due for another trip to the Forgetful Valley." Sokka said after skimming the list. Katara could hear in his tone that he was less than thrilled.

Toph on the other hand seemed pretty enthusiastic. "Neat, I've been wanting to visit these faces you've been telling me about."

"You think Zuko is up for another trip?" Suki finally spoke.

"I think that Zuko has a lot of Fire Lordly business to take care of. We're on our own this time." Sokka replied.

Katara held Aang close, leaning his head against her neck. She could hear his breaths coming out steady and calm, having yet to be burdened by the poison coursing through his veins. She hoped with everything she had that they would find this heart pool before his breaths had a chance to become labored.

 **.oOo.**

Getting from the Capital to Hira'a in itself had been a task, one that ate away at the precious time Aang didn't have. Despite protest from Sokka, Aang opted to give Appa a break from flying and left him in the care of TyLee and the other Kyoshi Warriors, leaving them a bison short. Naturally, Sokka made sure to remind everyone that he told them to bring Appa along, to the point where even Suki was urging him to be silent.

It was three days to acquire a ship and another two to arrive in Hira'a's port. Katara marked each one off on her calendar, feeling hear heart crumbling further with each dash.

"He could be wrong you know, about Aang having a few months." Suki pointed out.

Still clinging to the remnants of their last argument Sokka asked, "was that supposed to be reassuring?"

"Of course it was." Suki snapped back. "I meant that Aang could have more time than we think."

He could have ended it there, but his worry over Aang and the stress of travel added some fight into his spirit. "Well maybe you should think about how you say things." Or maybe it was the knowledge that he and Suki very well could have been on their way to Ember Island for a much needed vacation, but instead they found themselves in another life or death situation. No matter how it was, Sokka was feeling entirely agitated. The worst of it, he couldn't even begin to come up with a motivation for the attack.

"On the upside, it seems like healer Rozen has covered a lot of ground in the Forgetful Valley already." Katara noted after ogling the the map for a good while. "But that also means that the Forgetful Valley is a lot bigger then we thought."

"How much bigger?" Sokka asked.

"Well…" Katara trailed off. She double checked the map. "He covered pretty much the same ground we did when we went. I mean he explored the place a little more, but not much."

Sokka groaned, with any and all hope of them having come across it without knowing, completely obliterated, he was forced to resign to that he and Suki would have to reschedule their vacation for sure. At this point, Sokka didn't know if he actually wanted a vacation with her at all. He ran a hand through his hair, what was he saying? Of course he did! He decided that it had to be his anxious mind doing the talking. Still he and Suki didn't speak for the duration of the day. The only words he uttered, in fact, were a few confirmations when Katara inquired about the map in correspondence to their location.

Another three days, and they were still within familiar territory, relatively speaking. There were a few faces that Sokka recognized on the trees, and the spirit pools where they had met the Mother of Faces.

"This seems like a good place to set up camp for the night." Suki declared.

"Yeah, Suki's right, this place is protected too, so we can get a break from worrying about sneak attacks." Sokka agreed.

" _You_ can get a break." Toph shrugged. "The rest of us realize that not too many people come here."

"I think we should keep going." Katara gave her in put. "Aang's getting worse and it's only been little over a week. I think Rozen might have underestimated the poison."

"He seems like he's breathing alright." Sokka pointed out.

"Yes but," she lifted his shirt some. Beneath the cloth a thick dark patch was forming, raised in some spots like thick veins and spanning out agonizingly slow. Perhaps if it weren't so dark, he would have been able to see the slight pulsations. "I-I don't even know what that is. I think it's the demon blood."

Sokka's expression softened. "Alright, if you think it's best to keep going, we'll keep going."

Katara nodded. "Thank you Sokka. I want to get somewhere that isn't marked on Rozen's map, at least then it will feel like we're making progress." She kissed the avatar's forehead. "Hang in there, Aang." She listened for a response, anything to indicate that he could hear her. But his body remained slack and unresponsive.

They were hours deep into night time when they finally reached some uncharted territory. Sokka's feet were sore and his back was beginning to ache. He was glad for the water he replenished. He took a quick drink and kept moving, his eyelids feeling heavier with each moment.

"Are we ready to call it a night." Toph yawned.

The group came to a halt by a lake overrun by the most peculiar mangrove tree. Instead of dull tan roots, this tree boasted ones of metallic white. If Sokka stared long enough he could see tiny flashes of purple, that could be mistaken for fireflies if not for their color. They would occasionally blink across the roots and fizzle away.

"Yeah, I guess we can." Katara answered. Sokka could hear the reluctance in her voice. But seeing the exhaustion in her eyes…he wouldn't have let her push on even if she begged him to.

"Good night everyone." Not even bothering to craft herself a tent of stone, Toph practically flung herself to the floor.

Sokka crafted a small fire. Some hours before he had done some hunting and decided to cook the meat before it spoiled. The only one who didn't accept his cooking was the earthbender who was deep into some dream that sounded rather impressive.

Unlike Toph, Katara didn't sleep easy. She held Aang as tightly as she could so to feel his heart pounding on hers. No, she couldn't fall asleep, not when she was so busy monitoring his breathing. She felt as though it would somehow cease if she stopped. She was certain that she was alone in her wakefulness until she heard Sokka rummaging through his pack.

"What are you looking for?" She murmured sleepily.

After giving a small start he answered, "my waterskin." He found it and brought another splash of cool water into his mouth. "Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

"If only I could." She hugged her knees to her chest and rested her head on her knees. "Aang would probably give anything to be awake right now. It's not fair."

"What isn't?"

"That we want to sleep while he's forced to." Katara replied.

Sokka nodded. "We can't think like that right now. If we don't get some sleep, we'll never be able to help him stop sleeping. Right?"

He made it sound so logical. So simple."Right…"

And she tried.

Sokka though, he couldn't seem to take his own advice. It wasn't just Aang, it was Katara. He hadn't seen her in such a gloomy state since their father left for the war so long ago. He feared more than anything, what would become of Katara if she lost Aang. In a way she was right; it seemed unfair that Aang could withstand an all out war only to die at the hands of what was probably a stray arrow. But then why was it tinged with poison, he asked himself. It was one fiasco after another. Such was the life of the avatar, he supposed.

He stashed his waterskin away and busied himself with laying out a sleeping bag. If he couldn't actually get to sleep, he may as well go through the motions. He could still see the embers from his cooking fire glowing. It was almost soothing, hopefully enough to lull him to sleep. But then again, fire was never particularly something that he found comforting.

He gave his sleeping bag another shake, trying to get it to land as flat as possible so he wouldn't have to do much smoothing himself. From behind, somewhere nearer to the mangroves he heard a soft rustle. In no mood to deal with anymore stress, he chalked it up to the sound of his own sleeping bag. He offered the mangrove tree one quick sideways glance and nothing more. If he let his eyes linger at least a little longer he would have seen her.n her./p


	3. Under The Shade Of The Mangrove

"Are we ready to call it a night?" Even when she was tired, the earthbender had a voice that carried. Azula hadn't expected to find herself in the company of another human, much less a group of them that she already knew so well. She slipped between the large and exposed roots of the mangrove tree and waited for one of them to protest Toph's request. But it would seem that all of them were indeed ready to rest for the night. Azula shifted uncomfortably as the knee deep water, that the mangrove thrived in, soaked into her pants. "I guess we can." Katara spoke, arousing a soft groan from Azula. It was the confirmation she saw coming but hoped wouldn't. The former princess was in the mood for neither spending the night beneath a mangrove, swimming in bog water, nor for a confrontation. She was in no condition for a confrontation, so she resigned to retiring under the mangrove. She climbed her way onto the most comfortable looking root that would both support her body weight and keep her out of sight and lie down. It had been nearly a week and she was still sore all over and had grown no more accustom to her appearance than the first time she set eyes on it. For that she made a point to lay on her back, where there was no chance that she'd catch a glimpse of it in the water.

Between the discomforts of her root bed and the threat of another nightmare hanging over her head, Azula found no sleep. She would rather have another sleepless night than endure another dark dream that flung her back into that damn cave for another round of torment. She carefully dropped herself off of the root, making as little noise as she could possibly manage. She maneuvered her way out of the tangle of roots and into the opening, only to come to a dead halt and retreat back.

"What are you looking for?"

Apparently she wasn't the only one unable to sleep.

"My waterskin." Sokka answered. Azula observed the conversation from a distance. It brought unexpected pangs to her heart. She had no one to offer her the kind of comforts Sokka was attempting to give his sister. No, it was just she alone with her thoughts. Briefly she thought of revealing herself; to do what she didn't know, but it was a toss between scaring them off or something less sinister. She held herself back, and was proud to note that her actions were becoming less impulsive again. All the same, a part of her still wanted to stand out in the open. So when the voices ceased, she came to stand closer to the group. She didn't fully remove herself from the roots yet, but she came to stand where the moonlight filtered through most directly and placed a single hand on the outer side of the root. She held her position and watched Sokka rustle his sleeping bag. With nothing else to do, Azula took a step back to conceal herself once again. It was such a simple thing to do, but such a careless move all the same. Her foot came down on a branch, not hard enough to snap it, but enough to make a noise.

Sokka stole a look in her direction. Her heart leapt as his eyes fell directly upon her, causing her breath to get caught in her throat. She was cornered, and for an instance she thought that she'd be getting her confrontation after all. But he looked away once more, and Azula released the breath and slumped back against the root.

 **.oOo.**

The Avatar's companions looked weary, as though they could use a few more hours of rest. Even so, they were in better condition than she. At least they got two or three hours in, Azula got maybe a half an hour, if even for the second night in a row. Regardless she heaved herself out of the protection of the mangrove tree and tailed them from a distance. For once she could come up with no motivation for doing so, other than sheer curiosity. She looked like a beast, so she might as well stalk them like one.

"How is Aang?" She heard Suki ask.

"Same as before." Katara replied, "not so good."

Azula furrowed her brows, trying to take in what she was hearing. The Avatar wasn't well. She dared to creep along closer, using the trees and thickets as coverage. They snagged at her hair and clothing, but if that was the price she had to pay for information, she'd take it gladly.

"So which way first? To the east or west?" Katara asked.

"Maybe we should just keep going straight, north." Sokka mused aloud. "Toph can you sense anything with your earth bending?"

"You're gonna have to tell me what I'm supposed to be sensing."

"Spirit energy? A heartbeat? I don't know." Sokka admitted.

 _A heartbeat_ … Azula pondered. They were looking for the heart pool. She shook her head; it would be too coincidental. She must have drawn the wrong conclusion. She wanted to believe that she had drawn the wrong conclusion. But for what reason did she hope for that, she wondered to herself, she had no more concern with the heart pool, no intention of visiting it again. And she never had any concern with the best interests of the Avatar and friends to begin with. She decided that it must simply be the notion of the heart pool that aroused alarm.

The day was passing decently fast and Azula found it much harder to maintain her focus. Her eyes were feeling heavy and her stomach empty. It didn't help that she was watching Sokka cook a plump koi. She had no taste for seafood, but presently the smell was tantalizing.

She wondered if she could perhaps create a diversion and snatch the fish. But the maneuver would be too risky.

"Is it almost done?" Katara asked anxiously. "We really need to get moving."

"I'm cooking it as fast as I can." Sokka replied.

Katara sighed, "I know." She was pacing now, pacing and biting her nails. Azula didn't realize that the girl had such a habit. She looked at the fish and deduced that it still had a way to go before it was edible and slunk off to find herself a meal of her own. She did so with haste, for some reason she had decided that she couldn't afford to lose the gang.

Azula had herself an armful of fruit by the time she was back within her sightline of the group. They were done with their own meal and were already packing their belongings. She quickly downed a few mangos and stored the rest away in her makeshift pack. The mangos weren't much, but they'd be enough to hold her over until the gang called it another night.

.oOo.

Sokka ran through his pack one more time before concluding that he did indeed have all of his belongings. "Alright, I think we're all set."

"You're all set." Suki laughed, "the rest of us have been ready for a while now."

He shrugged. "A good journeyman always accounts for his supplies."

"Journeyman? That's what you are now?" Toph snorted. "If you say so, oh Great Traveler!"

Sokka brushed the comment off. He supposed that they could use the humor. From behind, he heard a surprised yelp. He watched the others immediately turn to face the source, they were just as shocked. But not him, for once his plan paid off.

It was a very classic net and rope trap, but it was effective. He deduced, from the pitch of the cry that it was probably a woman in the net, but he would make no assumptions. It didn't really matter anyways. He came to stand before the net, but not before the person inside had a chance to turn his or her back on him. "Why have you been following us?"


	4. A Tangle And A Chase

**MadMeijin: I will do everything in my power to thicken it more!**

* * *

For a moment, Azula thought to set the net aflame and make an escape, at the same time she felt as though she wouldn't get very far even if she did. They had more sleep and more food, they had more energy for a chase. So she held her position and held her silence. "Why are you following us?" Sokka demanded again. Truth be told she still didn't have an answer herself.

"Would you believe me if I said that I have no reason?"

"Not a chance." Sokka replied.

"Then how's this?" Azula began, "I overheard your conversation about the Avatar and it intrigues me. I want to see how this ends." It wasn't a lie by any means, and it was the only explanation she could come up with for herself. Deeper down she supposed it was more or less that she was hoping that they'd come across her and she'd have the company, but that wasn't something she was willing to admit yet, even to herself.

"Were you going to try to stop us or help us." Katara asked, holding Aang protectively close.

"I wasn't going to do anything, just watch and see how things played out." Azula shrugged as much as the net would allow.

"Well you can either help us or be on your way then." Sokka replied.

"It's a little hard to do either from within this net, wouldn't you agree?" Azula asked. The trap was growing tiresome, and was putting a dull ache in her back, mostly due to the awkward position she was forced to take up. Being a man of true and stellar etiquette, Sokka cut her free without a warning of any sort. With a soft 'oof' and a thud she found herself gracelessly sprawled out on the jungle floor. She slowly stood up and brushed her arms off and then her legs. It was more of a showy gesture than anything, for it would take more than a couple of hand sweeps to cleanse her of the dark that had been accumulating for the past few days. The firebender didn't particularly follow the 'an eye for an eye' mentality, but this time she would. Giving the same lack of notice Sokka had given her, she took off into a dead sprint.

"Sokka no! We don't have time!" Katara yelled, in turn alerting Azula that she would be pursued after all.

She weaved in and out of the trees, leaping over rocks, twigs, and other jungle clutter with little effort and all of the grace she lacked when falling from the net. But the Water Tribe boy proved to be pretty elegant in motion himself. She could appreciate that, there was a certain thrill to it. Being the chased instead of the chaser was something Azula didn't get often. The problem was, she was exhausted. She was in such a state before they had even begun, her initial assessment of the situation had been right—she had already depleted what little energy was granted to her by the mangos. She threw herself behind a particularly wide tree. Panting somewhat heavily she called, "when you said 'or get out of the way' I was under the impression that you would let me."

"Maybe I'm also intrigued." Sokka replied as he scanned the junglescape.

Azula found herself grinning, he always had been pretty clever and for that he was one of her favorites to toy with. Seldom did she come across someone who she thought to have a tongue and wits as sharp as her own. "Is that right?" She challenged. She knew very well that she should silence herself, she had a pretty strong feeling that he could assess her location of she kept talking, and maybe that's why he tried to keep her doing just that.

"It is. I was also kind of hoping you would decide to help us instead of getting out of the way."

She couldn't help herself, "and why's that?" Her own curiosity was going to lead her to horrible things.

"I don't know. Help me find out." Sokka offered.

Azula chuckled to herself. He was good at this. Very good indeed. But she wasn't ready to ready to let them see her face yet. She wasn't ready to let anyone see it. They thought that she was a monster beforehand…they feared her beforehand, it would be much worse presently. His footsteps where growing closer, she could hear him scuffling probably just on the other side of the tree. She had no choice but to make a gamble. "Alright, I'll help you." She paused, letting it linger there for a moment. "But you have to allow me something first."

"And what would that be."

"Give me your jacket."

"My jacket?" He asked, his voice was very close now. He was definitely on the other side of the tree, and he knew that she was on the other side relative to himself.

"Yes, your jacket. Do you want my help or not?" Azula was answered with a ball of cloth to the face. With no hesitation, she pulled it over her head and flipped the hood up. It was rather stuffy, but she'd rather deal with that than exposure. She wandered away from her hiding place and came to stand directly in front of Sokka, still slightly short of breath. "Well that was fun."

"Maybe for you." Sokka grumbled. "I don't suppose you know which way we came from."

Azula looked over the jungle and was reminded at once of the good ol' days of tracking Aang and his bison. "Not yet, but I will." She replied as she searched out the tree branches she had snapped along her way. It took some time, but she came upon a branch that was nearly severed and hanging at an odd angle. "We go this way."

"After you." Sokka extended his arms.

"Naturally."

 **.oOo.**

There was something familiar about her. The way she spoke, the way she played her game, the way she carried herself. Though the familiarity was tinged by a sense of lax amusement that he hadn't seen on anyone until her. Or maybe he had, just with a different overtone. It really had seemed like a game, done all in good fun. She didn't seem dismayed to have been caught so easily and he didn't feel guilty for trapping her in the first place. Not like he should have.

She was quiet though, for the rest of the walk, unless she was telling him which way to go. Occasionally he would look from his feet to stare at her. From her appearance he could make no assessments of her, not physically nor of her personality. All he had to go on was from the little peek at her personality during their chase. He had no face to gauge expressions from and because of his hoodie, he could spot no attire that could bare emblems of what she stood for. And suddenly he knew exactly why she requested his hoodie.

She had successfully made herself completely anonymous to him. She was a tricky one.

She stopped for a moment.

"What's wrong?" Sokka asked.

"Nothing." A gust of wind came by, carrying on it the scent of smoke. "That way." She pointed. As it would seem, the pair hadn't covered much ground. Only a minute or so later, they could see the rest of their party.

When they finally reached the group, Sokka was met with a set of scowls and frowns. "Katara told you to wait." Toph greeted.

"You just wasted more of our time!" Suki added.

"Nice to see you all too."

"This isn't funny, Sokka!" Katara accused.

Sokka put his hands up. "Okay, okay, sorry. I just thought that maybe we can use another hand."

"We don't even know her…him?" Suki muttered.

"Her." Sokka replied.

"We don't even know her."

"We can get to know her." Sokka pointed out. "Besides she probably knows this jungle better than we do."

Seeming to disregard all of his points Suki made an observation of her own, "why does she have your jacket?"

"Are you jealous?" Sokka questioned.

"What? No! I just... did she take it from you?"

"No, I gave it to her." Sokka confessed. "She wouldn't have come out if I didn't." He felt a twinge of annoyance at her continued silence. This was her fault too, and she wasn't saying anything at all. "Like I said, I think she can help us."

"Or she can stab us in the back." Toph muttered in his ear.

"Why am I being the optimist here?"

"Who cares." Katara finally spoke up. "You already wasted enough of Aang's time." And then to Suki said, "she's here now, we'll just have to deal with it."

Sokka stole a glance in her direction, beneath that hood her opinion on the matter was lost. She tailed behind them anyhow.

 **.oOo.**

With or without a face and name, it was clear that Azula wasn't a welcomed presence. She lingered a few feet behind the rest of the group, the only thing that had changed was that they now knew she was there. She considered that perhaps she should be thankful that that had no time for a full on interrogation.

She completely expected to have a problem with Katara, apparently the time simply hadn't come for that. There was however, something about the Kyoshi girl that was nerve grating. Azula decided to herself that she liked the girl even less than Sokka's sister and if she couldn't find a reason, she'd make one.

"You're falling behind." Sokka called back.

"I'm walking at my own pace." Azula declared.

"Which is causing you to fall behind." Sokka pointed out. "I don't think Katara is going to slow down for you."

Azula sighed, and on two feet that desperately needed a break, hustled to catch up. She submitted to the notion that after another series of poorly planned moves, she had made the wrong decision.


	5. To Be A Thing Of Pity

**Gust: Thank you for letting me know! I must have accidentally clicked the wrong document. I've fixed it.**

* * *

By sundown, Azula could scarcely keep herself upright. The last thing she could afford though, was a solid display of weakness. She had little leverage and was terribly outnumbered. The only thing she had on her side was a false bravado and if she could maintain it, maybe they wouldn't hassle her. She tried to remind herself that she wasn't in a battle and that she didn't need to go to such great lengths, but the notion did little to comfort her. So she carried on without complaining, despite feeling sluggish and achy.

Once again, she found herself lingering behind the rest of the group, this time due in part to having completely sapping herself of energy. Up ahead the others were making lively conversation—as lively as it could be under the circumstances. From the looks of it, Toph was doing a pretty decent job of lifting Katara's spirits. Sokka must have cracked a joke, for she could hear Suki giggling. Azula began walking slower still, in hopes that they wouldn't notice just how far behind she was falling. Perhaps she could quietly slip off and come up with a real plan. As the thought crossed her mind, she caught sight of Sokka breaking off his conversation and slowing his own pace. She knew what was coming next and groaned to herself.

"You seem tired." Sokka pointed out.

"I'm fine, actually." She lied.

"If this is you when you're fine, I'd hate to see you on a bad day."

"Tread carefully." Azula warned.

"I'm just messing around." Sokka laughed. "Here." He handed her his waterskin.

She gave it a scrutinizing look. "What do you want me to do with this? You already put your lips on it." She pushed his offer back towards him.

"Just thought you could use a drink." Sokka replied.

"Sokka!" Katara shouted.

"Looks like you got me in trouble again."

"You got yourself in trouble." Azula shrugged. "I didn't ask you to lag behind for me." She waved him off.

"Sokka." Katara called again, this time he caught a certain tremble in her voice. "Sokka, Aang isn't breathing. I-I can't help him."

Without another word, the Water Tribesman bolted. He was kneeling at Katara's side in no time at all. He took the avatar from Katara's hold and set him on the ground. His face was void of most color, and his eye—upon forcing it open—was dull in hue. With nothing better to say, Sokka remarked, "this isn't good."

"It hasn't even been a month." Katara whimpered. "I knew it, I knew we shouldn't have stopped. Maybe we would have found the heart if we would have—"

Suki cut her off. "A few hours wouldn't have made a difference. We can't start blaming ourselves. We have to do something."

"We could try kicking him until he works." Toph mumbled, earning herself three outraged looks. "Sorry, just trying to lighten the mood. But really, usually Twinkle Toes needs a good punch to get him going again."

"A good punch…" Sokka muttered. He placed his fist on Aang's sternum and cupped his other hand over it. With a steady rhythm, he began the compressions. A cycle of them followed by two quick rescue breaths. A succession he repeated until his arms pulsed painfully. Still he pushed forward until he himself was struggling to breath. Even then he kept at it until he was completely sapped of energy. "I'm sorry, Katara."

For a while Azula watched the pitiful scene from a distance, feeling a sort of twisted satisfaction that she wasn't alone in her suffering. The way she saw it, her situation was their fault, after all. Yet she knew somewhere within, that this wasn't so. Perhaps that part of her was the reason she heaved herself away from the tree she was leaning against and came to loom over Aang. "Give me some room."

The four took a few steps back. "More room." They stepped back again. She waited for them take the hints indicating that she wanted almost total privacy. At last they gave her the distance she required. Still, she needed to be subtle. So instead of getting right to it, Azula mimicked the motions Sokka had just preformed. And when she was sure that they had lost at least some interest she brought a crackle of lighting to her fingers and pressed them against the boy's chest. Over and over until she could feel his heart beating under her palms.

She stood. "He's fine. For now."

Katara practically shoved passed her and scooped Aang into her arms, her eyes glittering with relieved tears. "I thought I'd lost you." She mumbled into his ear. "Don't do that to me again."

The part of Azula that found satisfaction in their misfortune, recoiled in disgust. She was still miserable, while the girl was celebrating a victory, however small it was. Once again, Azula was alone in her somber mood.

Once again, she was alone in general.

 **.oOo.**

With their near mishap now three hours in the past, the group sat before a small campfire. Sokka had speared a few fish and was preparing to serve them, while Katara tended to Aang as best as she could, running a steady stream of water over the spots in which the demon blood seemed to be most drawn to. A few seconds in each spot had Aang at a semblance of ease. His body gave fewer pained spasms and twitches.

"You're helping him a lot." Sokka remarked.

"It doesn't seem like it." Katara replied.

"But you are."

"I was so helpless Sokka." Katara said. "This morning. I could do anything but watch. I never want to feel like that again."

"Water can't heal everything." Azula interrupted in such a tone that made what was supposed to be comforting, sound rather off handed. After giving a languid flick at her bangs she pulled one of the mangos from her bag.

"I made some fish." Sokka offered.

"Fish are gross." She replied and was quick to add, "like yourself."

"Your new friend is really something." Suki muttered.

"I don't know how I feel about her." Katara agreed.

"I don't know, I thought that it was pretty funny; Sokka is kind of gross." Toph snickered.

"Hey! I am not!" Despite his apparent outrage, he found himself rather relieved. Katara was laughing for the first time in a while. Even if it was at his expense, he was willing to take one for the team this time. He took a bite of his fish, listening as the conversation carried itself out. After a certain point he unrolled his sleeping bag and spread it along the ground. This prompted Katara to do the same. As per usual, Toph crafted herself a stony tent and crawled inside.

"Mind if I join you?" Suki asked. He beckoned her to join him under the blanket and wrapped it around her body. "I know I've been giving you a hard time lately." She confessed. "But you're doing great, Sokka. I think it's actually you that's holding the team together this time."

Sokka rubbed the back of his head. "Thanks, I try."

She pecked him on the cheek and moved to press her lips to his own. He found his hands tangled in her hair as she deepened the kiss. It wasn't the most elegant kiss, but it would do.

She broke it for a moment and laughed, "I missed this." Her hand slipped under his shirt, her fingers gliding along his chest.

"Me too." Sokka nodded before pulling her back in for another smooch.

 **.oOo.**

From across the fire, Azula propped herself up against a rock. She had little else to do besides watch them suck face. It was very nearly as appalling as seeing Mai and Zuko go at it. She glanced at Toph's rock-tent and suddenly envied the girl. Katara was also left to suffer the spectacle. Azula felt almost inclined to go complain about the matter with her, but she quickly recalled that she had no intention of making nice with the waterbender.

Instead she finished off one more mango and called, "do I need to build a room for you two?"

Immediately the two untangled themselves. In the light of the fire, she could see the color on both of their cheeks. Satisfied with her work, Azula laid down in hopes of getting at least a somewhat decent night of sleep. Even though she no longer had to deal with the dampness of the mangrove tree and the worry of falling off of it and into a muddy puddle, sleep still would not come. Her thoughts were as troubled as ever. The firebender knew that there was no sense in dwelling on it, but she still could seem to get the sight of her marred face out of her mind. Frustrated and despaired all at once, she clutched at the grass beneath her for no other reason than to alleviate the urge to punch something or set something aflame.

Worst of it, she was still in pain. Her skin still felt as if it were being ripped at in some places and in others it felt as though she'd been tossed into a boiling vat and somehow managed to come out alive. That on its own was bad enough without the addition of aching feet and a back sore from laying on the ground. She rolled onto her side, hoping that it would be more comfortable.

It was not.

Much like earlier, she heard Sokka approaching before she saw him. "What do you want, I _was_ sleeping peacefully."

Sokka chuckled, "and I'm a firebender."

Azula rolled her eyes. "What do you want."

"Well, first of all I wanted to thank you for saving Aang. We would have lost him you know." Sokka said as he dropped into a cross-legged sitting position.

"Oh. Yes, right." Azula replied, she cleared her throat, "it wasn't that difficult." Truth be told, the former princess hadn't expected any sort of acknowledgement for it.

"I also thought you might want this." Before she could refuse his charity, he draped his blanket over her body and smoothed it over her shoulders. "I guess it's not as good as a sleeping bag, but it's probably better than the ground."

"Yes, I suppose it is." She reluctantly replied. She had to admit, the fur was very cozy so she would accept his gift. She pulled it tighter to herself.

"You can take that hood off now, you know that right?"

Azula eyed the blanket she had just been given. "I suppose you're right." She rolled onto her other side, pulled the hood off of her head, and replaced it with the blanket. "Good suggestion."

Sokka frowned, "that's not what I meant."

"In other words, your advice is only good if one takes it the wrong way?"

"Also not what I meant." Sokka grumbled. His mood might not have soured so, if he had realized that he had made her smile. He stood up, "if you want to join us you can, you don't have to sleep all the way over there."

"I like it over here." Azula replied. His footsteps were grew distant before they came to a stop and then she heard them again, closer.

"You know what." He spoke. "So do I." She heard his sleeping bag drop and she uttered a small cry of protest, that did little to deflect him.

 **.oOo.**

This woman wasn't going to make it easy to get along with her, but he would make it work somehow. She was so deliberately cutting herself off from everyone else and he couldn't figure out why. He didn't think Suki and Katara had been _that_ off putting during their first encounter. Every time he thought of just leaving her to fend for herself, he got a vivid image of a lonely Katara laying on the rough forest floor.

The woman next to him had to be about Katara's age, if he could guess. Taking her size into account, she might be younger. And he very much did take her size into account. Her build was so small, she was just barely taller than Aang. He already gathered that she could fend for herself quite well; but all the same he hated the thought of her having to do so.

It took him a moment to realize what else was bothering him and even when he did, he couldn't quite make sense of it. It was her aura—not that he particularly believed in those—she was emitting an air of melancholy that he so desperately wanted to get rid of.

He imagined that she longed for some company, but was so deep in her pride that couldn't bring herself to ask for it. So deep in her pride, that she was pretending to detest it at worst and at best, feel nothing of it.

Some time, during the night he noticed that she had drifted off to sleep. She didn't exactly look comfortable and he could see that her expression was tense. Whatever she dreamt of, wasn't pleasant. But at least she was asleep. He wanted to reach out but thought better of it.

Sokka also noticed that at some point she either flipped the hood back over her head or she had shifted positions and it ended up back over her head. He was ashamed to admit that he thought, however fleetingly, of tugging it off. He could have a quick look at her face, put the hood back over her head, and pretend like he saw nothing.

Maybe it was because she stirred, maybe it was that she sleepily muttered something he could make out. Or maybe it was just his own decency. Whatever it was, he withdrew his hand and tried to get some sleep of his own.

He did sleep that night, better than the others.

It wasn't quite morning, but rather on the brink of it when he found himself roused out of sleep. At first he couldn't figure out how nor why.

It was her, she had woken him.

She hadn't meant to, in fact he didn't even know that she was awake herself. But all the same she was crying softly to herself. Maybe crying was the wrong word as it was only a few tears and a couple of shake breaths.

Sokka bit his lip and inquired softly, "what's wrong," and then, "are you even awake."

A slight shuffle of cloth, indicated that she was awake—or at least half so.

"Do you want something to drink?" Just as he asked, he remembered the first time he offered up his water skin. But this time she sat up and took it. He expected to see her uncork it with trembling fingers. Instead he found that her movements were quiet steady. She brought it to her lips, put the cork back in place, handed it to Sokka, and started. He couldn't imagine that she was staring at anything in particular. "You want to talk about it?"

"There isn't anything I would like to do less." She replied, and with that she was laying down again. Facing the direction opposite of him, naturally.

"Will you please let me help you?" He asked.

"I don't want you help." She said at once. "And even if I did, you can't fix what I need fixed. Your odds of helping the Avatar are better than your odds of helping me."

"It's hard hearing you cry like that…"

"I wasn't crying." She snapped.

He wanted so badly to reach out, maybe pull the woman into a hug. But he knew that she wouldn't take kindly to it. Instead he offered his sleeping bag. "At least try to get a little more sleep in." Either she was apparently willing to compromise or she simply wanted him to forget about seeing her in a moment of weakness, because she took the sleeping bag and tossed his blanket back at him.

 **.oOo.**

Azula didn't want to admit it, but she did feel much better rested when she awoke for a second time. As a whole, she felt quite better. Mostly better, that is until she replayed in her mind, the events that led to her feeling so. And all at once she found her cheeks flushed. That had been the precise kind of vulnerability that she was trying not to display.

Even so, Sokka had been kind to her despite any and all attempts to snub him.

Overall, the man has been nothing but good to her—save for entrapping her in a net anyhow.

She supposed she should repay him.

Azula rolled the sleeping bag up, secured her hood, and sauntered over to the rest of the group. Wordlessly she handed Sokka his sleeping bag.

"You gave her your sleeping bag?" Suki questioned.

"So?" Sokka asked.

"You never gave it to me when I wanted it." The bitterness in her tone and expression were not lost on Sokka.

"She was…" the word 'crying' nearly rolled off of his tongue, but upon seeing Azula go rigid, he reconsidered, "complaining." He finished. "A lot, it was getting kind of annoying."

With a 'hmmp', Azula folded her arms over her chest. It was better than the truth, but she still found the statement rude. She opted to let it slide. Once again she found herself observing the group re-pack. Katara stopped to check on Aang who was making a grotesque gurgling noise. Katara rolled him onto his side and watched a hefty flow of blood slide between his lips. At the waterbender's lack of shock, Azula fell under the impression that this has happened many times before.

At once she decided that it would be a good time to pay Sokka back for his troubles. She waited until they had finished packing and were silent. Azula was still reluctant, for she wasn't quite ready for another round of inquiries, but she spoke up regardless. "I know where the heart pool is and I can take you there."

Exactly four pairs of eyes fell on her.


	6. The Company That Misery Found

**to-anyone316: Thank you very much, I'm thrilled to hear that the cliffhanger was good. Hopefully this one will be even better. ;)**

* * *

Now Azula found herself some feet ahead of everyone, but that only came to be _after_ they agreed to not pester her about how she'd come to know the heart's location. She could feel it though, an atmosphere of unspoken curiosity that lingered heavily over the group like some nagging specter.

"How much further is it?" Katara broke the silence.

Azula looked in the direction of the mountains, they were still looming pretty distant. "Maybe a week on foot. Probably a few more days since we'll be stopping to sleep."

Katara's face paled some, "that's cutting it pretty close."

"If you have any ideas on how we can speed things up, feel free to share." Azula replied. She took the waterbender's silence to mean that the woman had none. The three days to follow were uneventful and had the princess falling into a sort of rhythm. Walk, eat, sleep. Walk, eat, sleep and then once more. To her content, she found that sleep was coming easier now; alongside the pattern she was growing used to the pain. She was nearly numb to it now. The knots in her belly weren't quite so awful when she thought of her appearance either—mostly because she pushed herself to simply keep it from her mind. Even so, it was what it was, she came to terms with knowing that she wouldn't be able to fix it, so she may as well get used to her collection of welts and sores.

Four days in was where things grew interesting, and not just for herself. Day four was something of hell for everyone in their own special way. It started with a new assortment of bumps and a different kind of rash and ended in fury.

.oOo.

"Sokka, what happened to your face?" Suki sprung up, her face was the picture of horror.

Sokka gave her a once over. "Probably the same thing that happened to your arm." With that, her horrified look grew threefold. Katara and Toph still slumbered, as they did he assessed them. The rash located itself on Katara's neck and Toph bore the same raw and bumpy red patches on her feet. Sokka groaned, his mind already formulating who would be carrying Toph and when. She would probably insist that she could still walk but he could allow her to risk infection. As things usually went, he would probably be carrying her the whole time.

He peered over at the other woman. She still had herself buried under heaps of clothing, but all the same he could tell exactly where the rash plagued her, for she was scratching quite vigorously at her right hip. Just like that he found that his face was feeling rather twitchy and was doing some scratching of his own, not that doing so provided any relief. The only one who went unscathed was Aang, whatever pest bit the rest of them in the night, knew to stay away from him lest the poisoner became the poisoned.

"Did anyone happen to bring along some mosquito-mantis ointment?" Sokka asked even though only the statement would only fall upon two ears. Evidently the stranger was so deep in trying to rid herself of the itchy feeling that _she_ didn't even hear him.

That left Suki to snap, "don't you think I would have offered it to you if I had it, you infuriating oaf."

"Infuriating oaf?!" Sokka threw his arms in the air, his itchiness momentarily forgotten. "I'm trying to come up with solutions here, what are you doing?"

"Telling you that your solutions aren't going to work." Suki replied.

"Will you guys keep it down, some of us are still sleeping." Toph grumbled. It was already too late though, in her newly awakened state, she too became well aware of their latest mishap. Obviously sleep was no longer an option. She gave Katara's arm a quick jab. "Say, Katara I could use some waterbending right now."

"Hmm?" Katara muttered dreamily.

"Ya know, waterbending." She demonstrated with a few exaggerated arm gestures and a couple of swishing noises.

"Are you even listening to me?" Suki asked.

"Actually I was kind of paying attention to Toph." Sokka replied rubbing the back of his head. All at once he felt bad for blowing Suki off. He didn't like to admit it, but he'd been doing that a lot lately, be it to talk to the stranger or to offer words of comfort to Toph. This was supposed to be their vacation, and he'd been snubbing her the whole time. He could hardly blame her for being so on edge with him.

"Alright fine, you know what, it's okay." Suki replied, the shrillness in her voice indicated that it was anything but. "Since you don't really want to listen to me…or talk to me, I'll just…I'll just." She stammered trying to come up with some kind of punishment. Her smug smile had him guessing that he'd be receiving the cold shoulder for the better part of the day. It couldn't prepare him for what actually came to follow.

He tried anyhow, "Suki, it's…I just have a lot to deal with right now. I didn't mean to cut you out." She looked him straight in the eye, stood, turned in the other direction, and stomped right across their campsite.

 **.oOo.**

Whether she wanted one or not, Azula found herself in the company of a new friend.

"And you know what I did next?" Azula didn't prompt her to continue, but she did so anyhow—loudly and with purpose at that. "I knocked him on the ground, flat on his face, and I said, 'anything else you want to teach us?' All of the Kyoshi Warriors were clapping."

"Fascinating." Azula muttered.

Either completely missing her disinterest or purposely ignoring it, Suki continued her tale. "So of course after that, Sokka comes blubbering up to me like," she paused for a moment and then in her best Sokka voice continued, "Uh hi Suki." She took special care to make sure her laugh sounded like she was having a blast. "I asked him if he wanted another dance lesson." This time her laugh was more genuine, but it did nothing to strike Azula's sense of humor.

At this point the princess couldn't tell which was more aggravating; the nagging itching sensation on her new travel companion. "After that he was all, 'Suki please let me explain, _pleeeeease_!" For good measure she took Azula's hands and dropped to her knees to demonstrate.

Finally, Sokka's temper flared, "I was not that whiney!"

"I know." Suki nodded in agreement. "You were much worse."

Azula could see the man's eye twitch in frustration. And in that moment she felt connected to him in a way that she'd never been connected to anyone before. As bad as she felt for him however, she used their blossoming war of tongues to quicken her pace, ditch the Kyoshi woman, and get back to her peaceful solitude.

 **.oOo.**

Katara listened to them argue from a distance. "If you were awake you'd know what to do." She whispered to Aang. "You were always really good at keeping this group together." She set one hand on his chest, savoring the heartbeats below. He was hanging in there pretty well and she admired him for it. If anyone could outlast demon blood, it would be him. Even still, the dark splotches were branching out. They unfurled like macabre roots from his chakara points and ebbed into his veins leaving them to show black through his clammy, discoloring skin. Katara gulped, but the lump in her throat came right back, bringing a few tears to her eyes with it. "We're going to make it Aang, she," she looked towards Azula as if Aang could follow her gaze, "said that we're getting pretty close." She stopped to listen to Sokka and Suki, hoping for an indication that their quarrel was dying down. She caught the word 'infuriating' and 'sexist asskisser' from Suki and from Sokka, 'snooty' and 'try hard'. Katara sighed miserably. "I suppose this is probably a bad time to ask them if they'd mind staying awake longer." Every bit of her longed to pull another all nighter, just to cover that much more ground. She didn't know that the group could handle that—tiredness probably had a good hand in all of their edgy moods. That was exactly why she was trying to keep quiet and keep to herself, the last thing she wanted to do was go off on someone over something as silly as asking for ointment.

 **.oOo.**

"How many times do I gotta ask you two," she sat up in Sokka's arms and brought her mouth fairly close to his ear, "to STOP BEING SO LOUD!" The earthbender had, had quite enough of this. She thought Katara and the stranger lucky, at least they could listen at a distance. She got the full v.i.p, front row experience to the Sokka & Suki soap opera. The only thing that was making this venture more bearable was thinking of it as a comedy sketch put on by the Ember Island Players. In terms of giving their journey a title, she was flopping between, 'Bender Blues' and 'Surviving Sokka: Jungle Edition'. Or maybe 'The Twinkle Toes Trouble.' She snickered to herself. Her joy was short lived though, in his irritation he loosened his grip, nearly sending her to the floor. She just barely had time to save herself with a good display of earthbending.

"I thought that the whole point of you carrying me was to keep me from being on the ground." Toph grumbled.

"Sorry." Sokka mumble.

"Nice goin', Sokka." Suki taunted.

"See, Toph, this is why I'm having a hard time."

Naturally, when Toph glanced at Suki the Kyoshi warrior had trotted back up to the hooded woman and announced, "you know why the whole trip has been awful? It's because of Sokka!"

"Sokka, I just want to go home, watch an Earth Rumble, and maybe get some fire flakes." Toph frowned. "I should have stayed at the palace with Zuko. At least I could leave when he and Mai fight."

"I don't see why you're so upset." Sokka remarked.

"Because your constant bickering is annoying."

"Hey, you know what that reminds me of?" Sokka asked. Toph knew what he was going to say before it was vocalized. "It reminds me of this one time when a certain earthbender was fighting with my sister and wouldn't stop when I asked her to."

"Okay, look here boomerang brain, that was different."

"Oh really?" Sokka asked.

From up ahead the stranger chided Sokka, "are you really going to pick another fight when you haven't even finished the first one."

"I have finished the first one, and I won."

"I beg to differ." The other replied.

"I did so." He insisted.

"You really are a that dense, aren't you? You've started two fights and you're asking for a third." She paused. "A third argument you can't even hope to win."

"Yeah, you tell him!" Suki cheered.

"On second thought, I'll just pretend like you didn't even say anything to me."

"Y-you were the one who started the conversation!" He accused.

"I'll pretend like I didn't hear that either. You're welcome."

"Great work, Sokka." Toph murmured.

"If I stop arguing with Suki will you forget about our squabble." Sokka asked.

"I'd do more than that to get you two to cut it out."

 **.oOo.**

Azula didn't truly start to feel the brunt of the misfortunes until later that night. Sure, Suki had been a mild agitation but it had been mildly amusing to listen to all of the ridiculous comebacks and taunts. No, as per usual, her miseries came at night. It was seldom just one thing either.

The first dismal thing came to her as she was tending to her mosquito-mantis bites. A little earlier on, Azula had come across a few herbs and some aloe. This was the one moment of relief for everyone, and the moment everyone else's dreadful luck seemed to be dying out. There was a sense of unity in mashing the ingredients together and an even bigger sense of comradery when the ointment was finished. Even Azula felt some tingle of a bond with them, at that point. Her luck, however, held no better than Toph's had earlier that day.

She had just finished rubbing the ointment on the rash when she came to realize that she had scarcely been bitten by the mosquito-mantises at all. No, most of the rash had been gifted to her by the cave guardian. All at once, the thoughts she had shoved back to the deeper sections of her mind resurfaced. She was tainted and unlovable, no amount of aloe essence could alleviate that.

It was never just one insecurity. Thinking of one always conjured the rest; maybe if she were stronger, if her bending was as good as it once was, she would have been able to fend the spirit off. Maybe if her mind had been as sharp…

She ran a hand through her hair and kicked the first rock she spied.

Despite herself, she touched her ruined face, feeling the swells and lumps beneath her fingers. She bit the inside of her cheek, if for no other reason than to keep herself from tearing up again. She already made a spectacle of herself in front of Sokka, she wouldn't do it again. It was only when she wandered away from the camp, for some privacy when she realized she wasn't alone in her tears this time. The way things worked out, someone else had the same idea as she. She supposed it was her turn to offer Sokka some words of consolation. The problem was, she didn't know how to initiate such a thing, so instead she just dropped herself down next to him and said nothing.

"She broke up with me." He said at last.

Something about that statement sent a wave of joy through her. Azula figured it was the satisfaction of seeing an enemy in distress.

"We were supposed to be snuggling on the beach." He added, his tone was unsettlingly level. This sapped the amusement out of Azula almost immediately. From experience, she knew that the calm indicated a fury of some sort to follow. "Instead, she wants to beat me with her fan or something."

"I'm sure that, that's not true." Azula replied. "She'd probably rather do it with her fists."

"Gee, thanks." Sokka grumbled. She knew that he wasn't just referring to the snide comment, he was blaming her somehow. And maybe it was her fault, he did mention blowing Suki off for her on numerous occasions.

"Look, I didn't mean to come between you and your girlfriend." And the she stood, she found that she had little else to say.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"Back to camp. Wouldn't want Suki to see us together." She shrugged.

"It doesn't matter now, does it?" Sokka asked. "Not everything is about you, you know that right." He added.

"Excuse me?"

"We were going to take that vacation to help us…figure some things out." Sokka replied. "I really thought that we could make things work."

"Oh." She replied simply, with a pretty decent impression that she had read his earlier tone completely wrong. He motioned for her to sit again.

"I don't want to be alone."

"I guess I don't either." Azula admitted, both to herself and the Water Tribe man.

With another exasperated groan, he buried his face in his hands. "I can't save Aang, I can't make Katara feel better, I can't even keep a girl."

Azula looked at her palms. Having no ability to maintain even a friendship, she had no advice to give. Still, for some reason or another that she couldn't quite grasp, she wanted to do something to make him feel less melancholy. Perhaps it was because he had gone so out of his way to make her feel welcomed and comfortable. The maybes mattered none. She didn't realize she had her arms around him until he leaned into the embrace. In that hug and with a horrible feeling of dread she realized exactly why she found it so amusing when the pair fought; the further he rifted from Suki, the closer he was to her.

This was the second dismal thing, though she didn't fully comprehend it until the sun rose again.


	7. More Human Then You've Ever Been

The fifth day was worse still, not that Azula would have known it from how well things began. The pair hadn't meant for it, Sokka had fallen asleep in her arms. She was the first to wake and it took her a moment's time to notice the weight pressed against her chest. He must have been a soothing companion, for she had fallen asleep not just in a sitting position, but with her back brushing up against the rough bark of a tree. Her head was still bowed with her bangs tumbling forward as she blinked the last traces of sleep away. Without a word or sound, she set Sokka on the ground and set off to fetch her pack.

"Have you seen Sokka anywhere?" Katara asked.

Careful not to respond too quickly Azula answered, "no, but I can't imagine that he could have wandered too far."

"If you see him, tell him that I packed his stuff and that we're ready to go when he is."

The man took it upon himself to come stumbling out of the woods a few minutes late. "Good morning!" The greeting was spoken to everyone, but he was looking at her. While everyone else returned the words, Azula turned her head and hustled to reassume her positon at the front of the group. That was her first mistake. She held her silence for the better part of the day, not that anyone took that to mean anything extraordinary. They'd come to view her as a quiet person. Save for an occasional instruction or a snide remark, she supposed they were right. Lately she didn't have much to say. When she did speak up it was to offer some information. "We should be there in another three nights."

This brought a huge smile to Katara's face and Azula very nearly felt bad in taking it away. "We should be at the mountain in three nights. Climbing it is a different matter." She specified.

"Are there any shortcuts?" Katara asked, hopefully.

Azula pondered it. "From the base of the mountain, no. But once you've climbed a little way, there are a few." Just thinking about beginning the climb had her legs aching. Not that she would actually be climbing.

"Thank you for doing this for us."

Azula shrugged, "I suppose I have nothing better to do."

 **.oOo.**

Suki ran her fingers through her hair. At this point in the day she and Sokka would usually be talking about something either mundane or silly or they'd be musing about good memories that they shared. About a year or two ago this venture would have been exciting, thrilling, maybe even a good time—minus the fear of losing Aang. When had things become so cynical?

"Are you okay?" Sokka asked.

"I've been better." Suki replied.

"You and I both." He forced a laugh.

"This whole thing has been so stressful." Suki sighed.

"You're not alone there." Sokka agreed. For the first time she noticed the bags under his eyes, the gleam that they lacked. He wasn't doing well, but God he was trying. He was still grinning at her, but the grin didn't reach his eyes.

"I'm sorry." She apologized for probably the eighth time since they arrived on Fire Nation soil. "I don't know why things have been so complicated."

"I guess it wouldn't be a real relationship if…" he back tracked. "I guess it wouldn't have been a real relationship if it didn't have any complications."

"'Wouldn't be' is fine with me if you want to just forget what happened yesterday. We were all exhausted and hungry and very itchy." Suki pointed out. "I think that we just needed to get it all out, ya know?"

Suki didn't miss the brief glace he spared the woman leading them. Something in his expression changed. He seemed almost conflicted before saying, "you know what, I think forgetting about it sounds good."

 **.oOo.**

He was a leaf-thin distance away from saying, "no, we can't just forget it." Even as he agreed, he wondered how many times they would just be 'forgetting the whole thing'. And even as he agreed he thought of the way his new friend held him. If he could guess, he would say that she didn't even mean to be so warm and comforting. But all the same, she was such. Regardless, it would seem that she had taken to ignoring him, like Suki had the night before. If he was being honest, it aggravated him how one minute she would be kind and in the next heartbeat she was being cold and standoffish.

His temper had no time to truly flare, before Suki pulled him into a hug and kissed him on the cheek. "I knew you would understand."

He was trying anyhow. He really was.

"We were all cranky." He replied. It probably was for the better to let bygones be bygones anyhow.

"Are you guys gonna stay together this time ooor…" Toph asked.

"We're staying together." Suki answered for the pair, with an optimistic smile.

 **.oOo.**

Azula tried not to look back too much, but she could hear the pair giggling merrily behind her. For whatever reason, their laughter annoyed her. She wanted nothing more than to put an end to it. "Could you two possibly stop fooling around and focus." She snapped. "I don't know about you but I'd like to make it at least halfway there by sundown and we can't accomplish that if we keep having to stop while you two hug it out."

She felt a hand on her shoulder, Katara's she noted. "It's alright, you actually helped us cover a lot of ground."

"Let's not lose that ground." Azula muttered.

Over the course of the day, she found many little things to chastise Suki and Sokka for—particularly Suki. What she didn't find, was a reason for doing so, other than that she was in a dreadful mood. First it was Sokka's cooking not being up to par and she had insisted that he had given her less than everyone else. Next it was Suki stopping to admire a peculiar jungle plant. And then it was Sokka who stopped to pick a flower and Suki for taking her sweet time in fixing it in her hair. Sometime later Azula came to a stop of her own to seek out a landmark. Somewhere around there—before she'd come across the group—she had tied her hair ribbon to a tree. After getting lost at that spot and going in circles for some time, she decided that the ribbon was a small sacrifice. Suki, still doting over Sokka had the misfortune of colliding with the firebender. With a surprised hiss she shoved Suki back.

"What was that for?" The Kyoshi girl demanded after regaining her balance.

"You shoved me first." Azula replied as if the answer was obvious.

"I _ran into_ you. It was an accident."

"Naturally." Azula sniffed haughtily.

By this time Sokka had his ears tuned to the conversation and the rest of the group came to a complete stop. She knew what was coming, but decided not to back down, she'd been doing so too much lately. Before Sokka could even start Katara asked what everyone has probably been dying to know, "what's your problem?"

"She didn't do anything to you." Toph added.

At last the four against one ordeal had begun. Even she knew that she had it coming after a whole day of nit picking and snide remarks towards one person or another. Her edgy mood was bound to flare some tempers. She had been bracing herself for a torrent of equally snarky comments or even a swift escort out of the group—after all, they could very well find the heart pool without her now—but the group always had a special way of catching her off guard in some way or another.

"I just don't understand." Sokka began.

"Well I'd imagine so, you aren't very bright." The lie came so easily to her that it took her a few seconds to realize that she wanted to take them back.

"That right there is what I don't understand. All I've done is try to make you feel welcome here and…"

"Yes, yes, all I've done is tried to make you miserable." Azula rolled her eyes.

"Actually no." Sokka replied. "What you do is worse. You make me feel like I've helped, you make me feel like you care and then you completely disregard it later." She opened her mouth to protest but he allowed her no time. "I thought I had a new friend but I get it, you only talk to me when you're feeling lonely, because I'm the only one who 'isn't bright enough' to see through it."

Azula's stomach hadn't fluttered that much since she lie on the cave floor sobbing next to the heart pool. His gaze was bearing into her as he awaited a comeback. At last, and quite softly, she answered, "That's not true."

"How many times do you think I'm going to fall for that. I'm not as dim as you think." He answered. As if to drive the point home, he took Suki's hand.

That night she was feeling especially awful. Azula never knew anyone—save for maybe Zuko—who was able to fail so spectacularly as she, at forming any sort of bond. But this time Sokka didn't come to her and she didn't go to him. For the first time in a while she was left on her lonesome at the edge of camp to soak in every detail of the day. Every snappy, crass comment replaying in her head. Azula couldn't come up with a reason for them either. The worst of it was listening to them all converse by the fire; they were telling ghost stories from the sound of it. The feeling of isolation weighed that much heavier on her. She drew her legs up to her chest and pretended to sleep. Some part of her was still expecting Sokka to check on her. Sleep befell her and she was still alone.

She didn't speak to him that morning either nor through much of the afternoon.

That left her with plenty of time to think. Among the things she thought of were various ways to inform them of her departure, form something resentful like, "good luck with the labyrinth", to something as simple as, "good luck with the rest of you task." She also thought of quietly slipping away again. But her mind was wandering too much for her to pick any one thing, even if she could she wasn't wholly sure that she wanted to leave. For one thing, it would make her look weak. But she sensed it more than ever, that she wasn't wanted. They didn't say it but not one person invited her to join their conversations. She shifted her pack to her left shoulder to give her right a break.

She found herself stuck again. As if all of the progress she might have made was for naught. To the point where she wondered if she'd made any progress at all in the first place. "We'll make it easy." She grumbled quietly to herself, imitating the cave spirit the best she could. " _Easy_." She spat with a snarl.

The truth was that she was hurting.

Terribly so.

She kept it to herself; Sokka had made it abundantly clear that he wasn't going to lend an ear this time. She wondered if he was feeling any hurt at all.

She listened in and pointedly decided that he wasn't bothered at all. In fact, he seemed happier than he'd been since she'd arrived. Everyone seemed to be in good spirts that day.

At this, she felt twice as secluded.

"How much further?" Suki asked. It took Azula a moment to realize that it was she who was being addressed. Regardless she pretended not to hear. They only talked to her when they wanted to know something. The Kyoshi warrior repeated her question.

"We'll get there when I want us to get there."

She could tell from Suki's dissatisfied expression that her answer was every bit as useless and unsavory as she intended it to be. Azula never knew anyone else aside from herself to be so deliberately petty and cruel, so it came as a decent shock to see the woman nudge Sokka, look up with innocent eyes, and inquire, "it's kind of chilly isn't it, Sokka."

"I guess a little bit, now that you mention it."

Already, Azula was clutching the jacket possessively.

"Can I borrow your jacket?"

"I'll have to get it first."

Azula was relived to gauge that he sounded at least a little apprehensive. But he confronted her anyways.

"Any chance I could get my jacket back?" Sokka so nonchalantly, as if he hadn't had a hand in making her so terribly miserable. And then she realized that again, she was only being spoken to because something was wanted of her and it hitched her temper to an even hotter intensity.

"Any chance you could piss off?"

Just like that, he made a grab for his jacket.

"Sokka, no!" Azula hollered as she evaded his hand.

"It's my jacket. I was nice enough to give it to you." He huffed as he gave another snatch. "Now give it back."

"I won't."

He was getting cross now. "Come on, don't do this." This time he had her by the sleeve. She realized too late that she should have fastened it shut. As it were, she had left it unbuttoned and it slid off at the first tug. At least the hood did. Knowing that its use was as well as over, she let him reclaim his jacket entirely.

It was either Katara or Suki who asked, "what happened to you?" Through the dizzy feeling of panic, Azula couldn't tell which had spoken but she didn't miss the sympathy embedded in the question. She didn't want it, she didn't want sympathy. They weren't even supposed to see…

She didn't know if her face was red from anger, embarrassment, or anxiety. Whatever the emotion, she found herself in a cold sweat. The little mercy that the world spared her was that they either didn't recognize the face they were seeing, or they didn't process it yet. She met Sokka's eyes very briefly before taking off into a dead sprint.

By the time she found herself out of breath, all of the anger gave way to crushing despair.

Perhaps if she really put the effort in, she could outrun it.

.oOo.

"You guys keep going, we'll catch up." Sokka wasn't even sure if it would be a 'we', from the looks of things it was he who would be catching up by his lonesome.

"Are you sure, Sokka?" Asked Katara.

"Yeah, just keep going. Aang doesn't have time to wait for us to get it together."

Katara nodded. By her leave he bounded thorough the trees. He was already painfully far behind the woman and was placing all his hope on that she'd tire herself out and stop for a rest. But he couldn't see that happening with so much raw adrenaline coursing through her. He had to find some way to gain more ground. It took more time than he would have liked but an idea came; he would take the path with less jungle clutter and vines overhead. It would require a detour but a ground free of debris and less vines to entrap himself in, he assessed that it would likely be faster. In less time than he anticipated he caught sight of her, and to his surprise she had slowed her pace. He could see it on her, that she had much more energy in her, but she wasn't using it. She must have assumed she wouldn't be followed. He lingered to long though and she noticed him spying upon her. Without a hesitation to make she was back into an all-out sprint, and lord was she fast. She expertly ducked under low hanging branches and vines and leapt over fallen trees with a surprising degree of elegance and ease. This was going to be more difficult than he thought.

It was just like their first encounter but without the playful overtones. His clear path had him on a level playing field with her though. He was a good arm's length away from her, now. If he could just close a little more space.

She too realized the current positioning of things for she turned around and with a demand that he stay away from her, sent a crackle of lightning in his direction. It exploded at his feet and knocked him on his ass. He scrambled to his feet, he had lost so much ground. From a distance he could see her fluidly navigating around the obstacles before her. There was something so familiar about the way she moved. He didn't have time to dwell on it. From the looks of it he would never catch up. Unless…

He didn't particularly want to resort to it, but he gave his boomerang a flick.

He winced as the boomerang collide with her leg and he watched her tumble forward, just barely able to thrust her hands out to keep her face from meeting the ground. He was only halfway to her by the time she regained her footing. But from the look of her next few stumbling steps, he had caused her a considerable deal of pain. He had to give her credit for her determination, she was still running, though slowed notably. She knew she had lost, but he was determined to show her that it wasn't a defeat at all.

It was only when his footsteps became audibly near that she came to a stop and lowered herself to the ground, with her knees drawn to her chest and her chin resting upon her arms. Sokka had to admit that he expected her to say something first; he wasn't sure what to do when she didn't. Truth be told he was so preoccupied in catching her he didn't have even a vague idea as to what he could say. 'Sorry' felt so cheap and so lackluster.

"You want to tell me why you've been so angry?" He asked.

When she said nothing, he rephrased. "Do you want to talk about it?" He waited for her to say that she would like nothing less than that. This time however, she didn't even offer him that. She sat rigidly with her back to him. He almost asked why she didn't talk to him if she was feeling that distraught, before vividly recalling how he guilted her for doing just that. He truly was at a loss as to how to help her this time.

"Do you want the jacket back?" He tried lamely.

He observed her pluck a strand of grass from the ground and flick it away.

With nothing else to do, he took a seat next to her.

When the silence became too much he mumbled, "I'm sorry I took the jacket. I didn't think you'd actually leave."

She rubbed her bare shoulders. Sokka found himself wincing again, the sores decorating them looked painful. It tugged unpleasantly at his heart. He placed his hand on her back in what was supposed to be a comforting gesture, but she flinched at his touch so he withdrew his hand. In the same moment he wondered if her back was covered in those same tender looking welts and bumps. Perhaps her reaction was a response to pain. He shook his head, knowing that there was no sense in lying to himself, she flinched because it was he who had touched her and for no other reason.

Sokka didn't know how long it was that he sat there quietly before mustering up the nerve to sit down in front of her. When she finally noticed his new whereabouts, she buried her face in her knees and under her arms.

"Come on, don't do that." He practically whispered. It took some effort to pry her hands from atop her head, but he did so at last. Almost immediately after, she reassumed the position. He supposed that he wouldn't push it, she probably already found him invasive. "Okay, if you want me to leave, I'll go." He stood up and stretched. He took only one step before he felt a hand wrap around his wrist and pull him down.

"Are you going to talk to me now?" He asked.

"No." She answered but lifted her head, her hair falling messily forward and obscuring her face. She made no effort to move it. But he did. With careful fingers, he brushed her hair back over her shoulders and tucked her bangs behind her ears.

Finally, he got a good glimpse at her face.

She shifted uncomfortably.

"Azula, is that you?"

She folded her arms across her chest with a soft pout, but didn't look away this that time. Her skin was terribly pale where it wasn't covered by rash and her lip looked as if it had endured multiple blows. Her eye too, was swollen, nearly shut at that. He thought it odd how much she resembled her brother. But he could clearly recognize the brilliant golden hue. Even thorough weariness, her gaze was still sharp.

"It is you." He confirmed to himself. He could definitely see it. "What happened?"

"Doesn't matter." The princess dismissed the question. And then, more hushed Azula added, "I really am a monster now."

Sokka could see the hurt and worry in her eyes, he wanted to get rid of it. "That's not true." He noticed her swallow and take a deep breath. For a moment he thought he was going to see her cry again. Instead she rubbed at her nose, for no other reason than to occupy her hand. Sokka himself looked skyward. They were going to have a long night if they didn't get going soon. Yet he decided that he wouldn't rush this, he didn't want to.

He took her slender wrists in his hands, they somehow felt so delicate—perhaps because she let them fall limp in his grasp. For a while the only sounds were a few late-staying birds, the rustle of palm fronds, and Azula's breaths as she fought to level them.

To level herself.

Her head was drooping down again, and her hair had come tumbling back out of place. Still she didn't weep, maybe she'd run out of tears to cry. More likely, he wasn't supposed to have seen her cry the first time, so she wouldn't do it again. If he left for a moment and came back, he wouldn't be surprised to see her doing so though. He wouldn't leave.

Presently, the only residual indication of her stress, was a slight tremble every so often.

He knew he ought not to, especially after just reconciling with Suki, but Sokka stroked the back of her hands with his thumbs. Her skin was rough to the touch and—he couldn't deny—rather unpleasant. He continued regardless, as it seemed to soothe her. He couldn't imagine that she was at all used to being cared for in such a way. Maybe that was why she took his cold shoulder so hard. He thought of Suki again, she would be furious. He felt bad in thinking such, but no less he hoped that Azula would feel too awkward about the moment to make mention of it after the pair reunited with the rest of the group.

Still she seemed tense and troubled, so he gently cupped her chin in his palm and tilted her head up so that he could look into her eyes. Those sorrowful, intense, golden eyes. Part of him still expected her to jerk away and look back down, but she held his stare. "Actually, I'd say that you're more human now than you've ever been."


	8. And A Heart That Will

**MadMeijin: Thank you so much! I was very proud of how that chapter turned out. It was one of the longest ones I've ever typed, I'm so happy to hear that it was well enjoyed.**

* * *

They had quite a long walk. Katara had clearly managed to lead the group quite a distance. Azula still wasn't particularly feeling up to such a long walk, she was mentally drained. But somewhere deep down, oddly relieved. Sokka's words were still buzzing faintly about her mind. They had been so simple, and yet they held so much weight. She still didn't know what to make of them nor what to do with them.

Every kind word he had uttered a few hours before proved to be every bit as jarring as they were comforting. They relaxed her greatly and eased her feelings of loneliness but all the same they invoked feelings within her that she ought not to have. Feelings that she still couldn't seem to make sense of.

So, she put an absurd amount of focus on tracing the path of Katara and the rest of the group. They were easy to track, as they left broken branches and a few footprints in obvious places, but Azula took to pretending that she knew less than she did—analyzing directions that they could have possibly taken, knowing very well which path they actually had.

Sokka was walking next to her. In very close proximity at that. He was never less than a finger length away. She could hear his breathing and feel his body heat. More than once he had grabbed her shoulder to keep her from running into a low dipping branch. She couldn't deny that she was still disoriented in some way or another so she didn't reprimand him for making sudden contact. She could feel it though, that he longed for something more. Eventually, the path grew more narrow and cluttered so he ended up trailing behind her.

She pushed a tangle of vine and jungle fern leaves out of her path, holding them back just long enough for Sokka to make it past. On one or two occasions she let a branch or two smack him in the stomach or the chest. Each time she muttered an apology, or a 'whoops'; they were only half genuine, if even that much. The truth was, even if it was only a mild annoyance, she was getting a kick out of letting branches hit the man. She didn't want to anger the only person who seemed to care for her, but all the same, she very well couldn't just let him get away with causing her such distress.

She let another fern leaf go on him. From the spitting and puffing noises that came from behind, she gathered that he had just taken a mouthful of fern. For the first time in the last few days she cracked a smile, however small it was.

"You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?" Sokka sputtered.

"What, no. I would never." She feigned innocent. Even as she said it she pushed another fern to the side for herself. With a devious smirk, she slipped past ungrazed before turning to look him directly in the eye and release her hold, sending it catapulting into his face.

Just like that, some of the tension seemed to fall away.

He let out a shrill yelp and swatted at his neck. "There was a spider on that one."

"Good." Azula replied.

"Glad to have you back, Azula." His hand was on her back again, she didn't have to look back to see his warm smile.

Despite everything, she wanted him to keep it there. And there it was again, the feeling of conflict. She fought to burry that desire. She would do everything in her power to keep him at a distance, where she would be safe from that caring look in his deep blue eyes and safe from the kindness of his speech.

It was growing dark and Azula found that tracking the rest of the group down was becoming genuinely difficult to no fault of her own. She stooped down to have a closer look at what may have been ashes from a hastily made cooking fire. To her discontent, the former princess found that it was burrow of a snake-mouse—alerted only by the creature slithering out and across her hand. Despite herself, she found her lip twitching in disgust. She stood again and looked about the jungle floor. She could find no trace, it was as if their trail had up and disappeared. At last Sokka caught on, "I don't see anything either."

"I think I had an easier time following you guys when you _didn't_ want me to." She mumbled.

"What's that?" Sokka pointed to the snake-mouse hole.

"A decoy." Azula replied, only feeling half sarcastic about it. "I think it may be best if we just make our own way to the heart pool and hope that we run into them along the way. Worst case, we meet them at the base of the mountain."

"Should we call it a night." Sokka questioned.

"Not yet." Azula responded. Her determination mostly stemmed from loathing that it was she who had hindered their progress. Such a thing was unacceptable by all accounts. She still found it rather embarrassing that she had chosen to flee instead of hold her ground. So, she would push forward.

 **.oOo.**

From that point forward Azula fell into silent determination. For much of the walk, she hadn't even vocalized directions, she just expected him to follow in her lead. The playful jest was over and she was back to holding the branches away from him properly. This time the silence wasn't weighted in sadness nor anger, nor even frustration. Still, he dared not take from her focus. He had to admit that they were covering a great amount of ground—Azula was as quick as ever and seemed to be unburdened by tiredness; he found it hard to imagine that just that afternoon she had seemed so worn out. He on the other hand could go for some leechy nuts and a bathroom break.

At last he called for her to stop for a moment.

"Did you find something?" She asked.

"Yeah. I found the guts to ask you if I can take care of business." He pointed to a tree.

"Make it fast and don't let yourself get attacked by a tiger-lemur. I hear those things are pretty nasty." He observed her propping herself up against banyan tree. "Though it might be fun to watch you try to ward one off." She took the care to add.

He hustled behind a different tree and unzipped. All things considered, the princess seemed to be holding up pretty well. Though he did dread telling the rest of their party exactly why that jacket had been so important to her. He wondered if she felt the same anxiety. If she did, she sure wasn't exposing it. He pulled his pants back up and rejoined the woman in question.

She tossed him a bar of soap and pointed to the nearest puddle she could spy. "I know you're a peasant but you can still wash your hands."

Sokka found himself thankful for the darkness, and its ability to cloak his blush. He quickly scrubbed his hands and put the soap back into his pack where Azula had fished it out from. He slung it back over his shoulders and paused. Removing it once again, he took out the jacket. He draped it over her shoulders. "I thought you might want it back."

Azula nodded and with that she sent them back into another bought of quietness. Sokka had to admit that he rather liked listening to the sound of crickets and the occasional eerie wolf-bat call. Coupled with a gentle and balmy breeze, the night was quite ideal for a trek through the jungle. When they came to certain spots he could make out thick, dark, diamond sprayed patches of night sky. He couldn't seem to find the moon. The only other light came from the small flame licking at the sky from within Azula's grasp. He could see in the light that her eyes were fixed dead ahead and her lips were pursed in concentration. She came to another stop. "Do you smell that?"

He took a second to sniff the air. "Fire?"

Azula nodded affirmatively. "Not mine she added."

He took a second whiff. In it he could detect some type of meat.

Out of nowhere he felt a hand cup his. "Stay close." She whispered. In her words he sensed danger and all at once he wondered if they were the only ones in the jungle. The princess no longer wielded her fire. He felt the tension leave his mind; her grip was lax. He realized that she was merely referring to how she would no longer be using her bending to light their path. He realized also, that she had slowed her pace as she worked double to avoid any of nature's traps.

"Can't we have just a little light. One small, teensy flame?"

"I need to know exactly where the smell is coming from." Azula replied. "That's…" she faltered as a palm frond slapped her cheek, "a bit difficult to do when I have a fire of my own to mix with the scent we're following."

"If I'm not mistaken, we're fairly close." She added when he didn't reply."

By that time, he could hear a few voices; the loud and powerful bellow of Toph and the light chatter of Katara. He was about to ask Azula if she was aware when he caught sight of a fire blazing at her fingertips again. Soon they were in sight of the camp and no longer needed her light at all. She took a moment, probably to gain her bearings. He couldn't miss how she readjusted the jacket, nor how she came to hug it tighter to her body. But she didn't pull the hood over her head. Apparently, she had more balls than he, for he realized that she probably had no intention of doing so.

Azula however, made it plenty clear she would not be the one announcing their arrival.

"We made it." He declared. "I can't believe you guys are still up."

"I couldn't just fall asleep knowing that you could be out all alone in the jungle somewhere." Katara replied. At this, all eyes were on him, leaving Azula to feel thankful that she had that much more time to prepare something good to say. "He woke up, you know." It took him a moment to put two and two together. "It was only for a moment, but he said that it didn't hurt…"

Used to hearing her trail off like so, Sokka inquired, "what else did he say?"

She didn't reply for a moment. "He told me he was sorry and that he wouldn't be hurt if I found someone else. He doesn't want me to live alone if…"

Sokka nodded, understanding.

"I'm so glad you're alright." Suki replied. "It started getting dark and I was getting pretty nervous."

"I can handle myself just fine." He declared. "And besides, I wasn't alone." That was Azula's cue. But she didn't seem to want to take it. Rather she seemed to have arrived at the decision that she'd just let them observe and come to their own conclusions. She sat herself down in front of the fire and waited.

At last Katara spoke, "Azula?"

The princess nodded, her gaze never shifting away from the fire.

"I could have told you that." Toph laughed. "She's like twinkle toes, but not as…twinkly." At this, Azula's brows furrowed. "Your vibrations are a bit harder to detect than everyone else's." The earthbender elaborated.

"Why didn't you say something?" Suki asked.

Toph shrugged, "thought you guys already knew."

Sokka took notice of at least a little tightness fleeing Azula's posture. He couldn't gauge much else as to how she was feeling.

"Why _are_ you helping us?" Katara asked. "You don't like us."

"I suppose I'll have to let you know when I find a reason." Azula replied. "You're a dreadful bunch really." She added earning herself a glare from Sokka.

"She was being pretty nice when we were alone." Sokka pointed out.

"I was not." She protested quite simply. She stood up again, snatched Sokka's blanket—ignoring his abrupt, 'hey!'—and found a spot away from the others to spread it out. He couldn't suppress a sigh. "You guys wouldn't mind if she slept closer to the rest of us, would you?"

"I don't care." Toph shrugged. "I'll be in my tent anyways." As if reminded, the earthbender stood to erect the structure.

Katara cast an apprehensive glance at Azula's lonely figure. "Well, I mean she hasn't done anything awful yet. Minus this morning."

"I would rather her not. She probably has some ulterior motive. You need to be careful, Sokka." Suki whispered. He had to give her props for honesty.

"I think you've been out voted." Was all he replied before beckoning Azula to join them. "Trust me, she's alright. Kind of difficult to deal with, but she's alright." Seemingly reluctant, the princess came to sit before the fire.

"I guess you're alright too." Suki smirked. She gave him a playful jab in the arm. "More than alright actually." But his eyes were still on Azula who seemed to be devoting all of her energy into staring at the fire and avoiding conversation. Suki caressed his cheek. "I think we deserve a little alone time, wouldn't you say?" She asked.

"Alone time." Sokka pondered. Before he could answer either affirmatively or otherwise, Suki's lips were upon his own. They held all of the passion he recognized. With everything he had he latched onto that energy and deepened the kiss.

So why couldn't he seem to feel anything at all?

 **.oOo.**

Azula didn't much feel like getting up—especially since she had just set up. Not to mention that she found her spot at the edge of their camp to be rather peaceful. Regardless she wrapped her blanket around herself and strolled closer to the campfire. She supposed, at the very least, it would do her well to be near the familiar pop and crackle of it. However, she very much could have done without hearing the Kyoshi warrior get all sappy again. Everything about the girl aggravated Azula tenfold. She hoped that she was conveying that strongly enough for Suki to feel it.

They were all deep into whatever they were doing; Toph adding more pizzazz to her tent, Katara tending to Aang, and Suki and Sokka in their conversation. Perhaps that's why none of them took notice to how the fire suddenly flared up. If Azula couldn't char a body or two, she could at least fantasize about it.

She looked up from the fire at just the wrong time. And just like before her anger melted away into something else. An emotion she couldn't quite place—a blend of emotions she couldn't quite place. Sokka held the Kyoshi warrior so close. Closer than he had held her. He pulled away briefly, only to kiss the woman again and twice as lovingly.

And for the first time in ages, Azula felt nothing.

There was no burning sensation eating away at the skin on her back and belly, no throbbing in her arms, no random twinges of stinging pain in her face. For a brief time, it didn't even register; she'd grown so used to the dull ache. She brought a hand to her cheek. Her fingers brushing over soft, delicate skin. The skin she was used to. The skin she'd always known, smooth and untainted—save for a small scar from being thrown so harshly against the cave's wall. Azula swallowed hard as the realization set in. She stood up and silently excused herself away from the rest of the group.

And for the first time, perhaps, ever, she felt everything.


	9. A Mouth That Gapes Wide

**Gust: Thanks! That's actually really flattering to hear! :D**

 **Vienx: This is also wonderful to hear, thank you.**

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She didn't know how long she walked for nor how far. It was late though and her body and mind called desperately for sleep. So Azula curled herself up on the floor, but could only manage to lie awake. She twirled her bangs around her pointer as she contemplated her situation. The cave spirit, she came to conclude, was rather masterful at what he did. He had cornered her into picking between physical suffering and mental turmoil. Either which way, she would be ailed—she had simply strolled into unfamiliar territory. She longed to take that decision back and suffer the physical torment. She pulled the hood back over her head and waited for the morning to come.

"You really like to wander, don't you?"

Azula groaned to herself, Sokka was the last person she wanted to see. Just like nearly every other time though, he was able to find her.

"Apparently I didn't wander far enough." She responded.

"Now that you aren't angry with me, do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

"Absolutely not." Azula replied immediately.

"Well if you change your mind, you know where to find me." Sokka replied.

"Shouldn't you be with Suki?" Azula spat.

"I can't just let you leave again."

As she so often reverted to, when in moments of distress, she poised her tongue for another argument, "do you think I can't find my way back?" Even still she feared another day of being ignored and generally disliked.

To her luck, he didn't take the bait this time. Instead he went quiet for a moment and confessed, "I think that you don't want to. And that's what worries me." Something in the way he said it, also told her that he'd likely drag her back to their camp kicking a screaming if he had to.

"That's not true." She admitted. "I sort of don't mind your company." Sort of don't mind it, she repeated to herself. She yearned for it and it was consuming her. In an instant she realized that she probably couldn't bring herself to tear away from the group now. Perhaps they weren't pleasant company, but they were company.

"Does that mean you'll be joining us tonight?"

"I'm not moving again." Azula replied stubbornly. Deciding that some distance from him would probably do her well. Maybe if she slowly drew herself away from him, she could rid herself of the feeling completely.

"If I leave right now, can you promise that I'll see you in the morning?" Sokka asked.

"I can promise you anything, but that doesn't mean I won't break my word." She answered. "So sure, Sokka, a promise I'll come back to camp in the morning." Azula couldn't offer him a definitive answer, because she herself wasn't sure how she wanted to attack the situation.

"Well that's reassuring." He said. For a moment she thought he was going to lay down next to her to make sure that she wouldn't sneak off. But he left her to make her own decision.

 **.oOo.**

"Just give her a few more minutes, she'll come back." Sokka insisted. And to himself added, "she has to."

"Sokka, I don't think that she's coming. She's playing with you…again." Suki grumbled.

"She'll be here."

"She has until we get our stuff together." Katara gave her input as she helped Toph fold her sleeping bag. "If we hurry, we'll make it to the mountain by late afternoon." She looked at Sokka in such a way that told him that they would be at the mountain, undoubtedly, by noon. He dared say they'd reach it before then.

Each time he placed a new item back in his pack he looked to where the trees began to show more compact, expecting the princess to finally emerge. He was running painfully low on things to put away.

At last he was able to make out Azula's tiny frame emerging from the tree line. In one hand she gripped her pack and with her free hand, she rubbed at tired eyes. Everything about the way her hair bangs appeared tousled beneath the hood and how her clothing had been hastily fastened told him that she'd overslept. With a sluggish gait, she came to join the rest of them.

"I didn't think you were coming." Sokka noted.

"I didn't either." Azula replied. "So I went back to sleep…"

"And?"

"I was hoping you guys would have been gone by now." Azula shrugged.

"That explains why you didn't have time to make sure the jacket was fastened properly." He commented.

"My decision to join you was last minute." She finally came out with the truth. "I supposed that since I could still hear you all taking—you're horribly loud, by the way—I wasn't meant to part ways with you yet." As she spoke he worked to realign the buttons into their proper positioning.

"You mean you didn't come back just to see me?" He feigned shock and hurt.

The princess looked him straight in the eyes and answered, "of course not."

He finished fussing with the jacket. "Well, I'm glad you could make it."

Though he shouldn't have been surprised, he had come to view her fighting with her hair as they walked. He had to give her credit, she was doing a pretty decent job for trying to tame her locks with that hood still covering her head. It also amazed him that she thought to bring her comb but not a waterskin. Before he could stop himself, he vocalized this realization.

"I had one. It snagged on a branch and tore." Azula explained. "Not much use after that." They were walking side by side now and he watched her slip her comb back into her pack. She waved away a swam of bugs. The same swarm that had him flailing his arms like an idiot. "Shouldn't you be by your girlfriend?" She asked.

"I suppose, maybe. But I like talking to you; she has Toph and Katara to keep her company, you…"

"Don't have any friends. Yes, I am aware." Azula finished. "I don't want your pity, Sokka."

All at once Sokka recalled the man he used to be some time ago; the kind of guy who only wanted to converse with a person when they were at their highest. Never had he considered that talking to someone only when they were at their lowest would earn him some scorn. But if anyone could give him shit for that, it would have been Azula. "I'm not talking to you because I pity you."

"Then, why?" Azula questioned.

"Why are you helping us right now?" Sokka returned fire. After a bought of quiet her replied, "exactly." He contemplated bring up how fondly he thought of the night they'd spent snuggled under the tree. He recalled vividly, the feeling of her arms around his middle, the way her hair tickled his neck, the feeling of her chin on his shoulder. Mostly, he remembered how she was so quick to drift off to sleep and how he didn't have the heart to wake her and ask her to release her hold—Agni did she have a firm grip, especially in sleep. Thinking back on it, it was odd. Surreal, to know that the firebender could be so compassionate and tender. He couldn't see her face now, but he could imagine that her expression was as stern as her strides were.

"Sokka, look at this!" Suki called.

He looked at the other woman, who was quick to wave him off.

"Wouldn't it be lovely to get a portrait done here?" She motioned to the landscape. "You and me with the falls behind us and the jungle fern. We could sit on that rock…" she trailed off. "Anyways, it's a lovely view."

"Imagine the view we would have had on Ember Island." He couldn't help but to utter.

"This is still nice." Suki smiled cheerfully.

"Nice." He agreed simply. It disturbed him how little the conversation engaged him. Suki's words were so kind and loving again. It was like all of the tension from the years gone by seemed to have melted away, as if that one fight had released it all. Yet they didn't seem to have any spark to them. No matter how much he tried to fire one up, their conversations seemed to be lackluster, to no fault of Suki. His mind wandered again to Azula. Now there was a conversation with spunk… he shook his head.

"You okay Sokka?"

"Yeah, great." He replied. "Just kind of anxious for this whole cave thing. I never did like those."

"Really, I thought you had a blast in the Cave Of The Two Lovers." Katara elbowed him. It was wonderful to see her coming out of her own dismal mood. Aang looked no better than before, but with Azula's freakish knowledge of the jungle, his odds were faring much better.

"Cave Of The Two Lovers?" Toph asked.

"Oh yeah, I forgot, you weren't there for that…"

Suki took his hand. "Don't worry about the cave. I'm sure there's nothing to worry about in there."

Sokka could have sworn he heard Azula mutter, "pfft…yeah, okay." But for the sake of his own manhood, choose to pretend like he didn't. Instead he put a ridiculous amount of focus on the feeling of Suki's hand in his. As if to prove something to himself he dwelled on how soft and pleasant it was in comparison to the roughness he'd found when rubbing Azula's. Part of him felt bad in thinking so. The other part was relived to put Suki back up on a higher pedestal. For the rest of the walk he made a point of walking notably close to her while she chattered in his ear. He had to admit, she had some lovely stories to share about the days on Kyoshi Island before he had arrived there all those years ago. Eventually he found himself getting back into the vibe of their conversations.

There was no greater sense of relief.

 **.oOo.**

The mountain was looming ever closer. Azula's reluctance to continue grew with every step. Over and over she kept repeating to herself, that she wasn't yet in the cave, she was only near it. There was a difference. The notion helped her little. She tossed a glance over her shoulder. For a moment she wanted to call Sokka over. Or even Toph. Frankly she just didn't want to be alone. Even less so, did she want to come off as a frightened child, so she kept her sense of foreboding to herself. To her luck, Katara approached her on her own accord. "Thank you again for getting us here." The waterbender spoke. Azula supposed it was a little surprising to hear the woman thank her even with her truth exposed. "I don't think we would have gotten this far without the help." She confessed.

"Right, well I am the most useful of this sorry party." Azula shrugged.

"Do you have to make complimenting you hard?" Katara asked.

"Naturally, yes." Azula replied. "You need some way to remember who you're talking to."

"The blue fire works just fine." Katara pointed out.

"Believe it or not I don't shower people with fire when they say pretty things to me."

"That's not what I meant." Katara replied.

"You sound like Sokka." Azula noted.

"How can you say that after I just complimented you!?" Katara asked.

"My mouth slipped." Azula shrugged again. If she wasn't mistaken, the firebender would have said that Katara got a kick out of that one. She had to admit that the conversation had touched her sense of humor. Despite the nagging sense of impending doom that loomed over her like the shadow of the mountain, Azula found herself in pretty good spirits.

So long as she didn't look back at Sokka and Suki.

For that, she decided to indulge Katara in a full conversation. They talk of many things; Azula shared some of the rich history of the Fire Nation and the heritage she took such pride in. Katara retuned that with some rather fascinating Water Tribe lore. According to her, in the Southern Watertribe, at the winter solstice children used to leave fish offerings for a half-human, half-penguin so that their hunting season would go well. "I never really believed that one. But Sokka did."

Azula could very clearly imagine Sokka believing something so silly and standing outside of his hut in the dead of night with an armful of fish. "What an idiot." She replied.

"He can be a bit dull up here." Katara tapped her head.

"I do believe that I've mentioned that before." Azula said. "Multiple times."

Only moments after their conversation died out, did Azula find herself standing directly before the entrance of the cave. Gazing into the mouth of the cave, the panicked feeling finally set in. She gulped slightly as the first musky, earthy stench assaulted her nose. With the smell came a torrent of less than pleasing memories. The cave spirit's final warning echoed so loudly in her brain that he might as well have been lingering next to her, whispering it in her ear.

Maybe he was.

 **.oOo.**

Sokka heard Azula clear her throat before dismissing them with a, "well, you all have a great time."

"I'm sure it will be, with you here making occasional commentary." Sokka replied.

"What, no." She said, coming to sit down on the nearest log she could spy. "This is as far as I go. Caves and I don't get along."

"You don't get along with us, and here you are." Sokka pointed out.

"Caves are intolerable. If I cover my ears and pretend like I'm talking to different people entirely, you guys are manageable."

Sokka opened his mouth to ask her if she was actually _afraid_ , but quickly thought better of it. Even if he hadn't, Katara vocalized her thoughts first. "You said that there was a labyrinth. Aang has maybe a day or two left in him…"

Azula cut her off. "What makes you think I know my way about it?"

"We were told that the heart pool is a legend. You made it pretty clear that the heart pool is real. You wouldn't have if you _didn't_ see it for yourself." Katara replied. "Azula we need you."

"I bet you do." Azula grumbled. Still, something in her expression softened.

Once again Sokka felt a twinge of guilt in deciding to take it and run with it. "We…I want you to come with us. We can't just start a journey with you and not finish it with you."

"I do believe that you started it without me. So by all means, you can finish it that way too."

"But I don't want to."

 **.oOo.**

Just like that her unwavering stance crumbled. From the start she had planned on leaving them when they got to the cave. She promised herself that she would. She couldn't help but give an inward laugh, remembering exactly what she'd told Sokka the night before about herself and promises. Even so, the cave looked dreadfully daunting.

"I know this is gonna sound weird, but I like having you around." Sokka added.

Her grip on the log tightened.

"Please stay with me." He held his hand out. Highly apprehensively, Azula took it. The Water Tribesman helped her to her feet and lead her to the mouth of the cave. Again, the overwhelming stench of it taunted her. It wreaked of the cave guardian. As if sensing her ambivalence, Sokka's hold on her hand tightened.

Despite everything screaming at her not to, Azula stepped into the cave.


	10. Navigating In Hyperawareness

**Crapshack: Oh yes, shit will definitely be hitting a number of fans soon lmao. Glad to hear that the last chapter tickled your feels lol. Angst is one of my favorite things to write.**

 **Soulhope The Wolf: I can totally see that be an other interesting way to have approached this fanfiction. However it wouldn't have quite worked with the direction I was taking the fic. For multiple reasons it had to be Aang and Sokka needed to be awake and fully aware of everything. I hope that you'll still find the fic enjoyable no less. ^_^ Thanks for your feedback, got me thinking of AU's for my own fic lol.**

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A familiar chill set in, only dulled by Sokka's hand on her shoulder. Azula didn't shrug it off, she craved the physical contact; it was the only thing keeping her from fleeing then and there. Aside from their footsteps it was utterly and ominously silent. He was somewhere in the cave, waiting for her. Did he already know she was there? There and breaking the one rule he was adamant about. Azula let a burst of flames pop to life in her palm and braced herself to see the cave spirit standing right before her in the newly awakened light. She released her breath upon coming face to face with a vast and vacant passageway. She squinted into the crevices that her fire's light did not grace—nothing peculiar in them either.

"You alright?" Sokka asked, cutting into her sense of trepidation.

"I'm fine." She replied, leaving the addition of, 'for the time being' unspoken. She swept her fire along the cave walls. "There should be a hidden passageway somewhere around here. There's a set of stairs behind it."

Toph gave the ground a quick stomp. "It's over here." She pointed.

"Say Toph, do you think that you can guide us the rest of the way?" Sokka asked

Toph shook her head, "I don't think so. There's too much clutter, something is making these weird counter-vibrations, they're messing with my vision and I don't know where they're coming from." She cringed, "I shouldn't have done that."

Once again, all eyes fell on Azula, prompting her to speak. "This way." She quite hated the staircase; it was narrow in width and the stairs themselves were elongated in height. Sokka and Suki, the tallest of the bunch seemed to be navigating them smoothly. For that, Katara had handed Aang off to him. Toph and Azula were having the most difficult time—the princess found herself taking ridiculously huge strides just to make it up one stair. Her thighs were already throbbing and they had hundreds more to go.

"How are you doing up there?" Sokka asked some twenty minutes into their ascent.

"Just charming." Azula grumbled with a huff. The climb finally had her slightly winded. For the time being, she couldn't think of anything she hated more than stairs. She supposed that combing her way through multiple levels of the labyrinth (as she did on her first visit) would have been thrice as nerve grating. By the time she reached the top of the staircase, a grand fifteen minutes later, she had to prop herself against the tunnel wall and let her breath catch up with her. Her break went unprotested, they seemed to have silently and unanimously agreed to take one about three stories below.

Sokka allowed Azula a much-cherished swig from his waterskin. After wiping away the few beads of water that had trickled down her chin, she pushed herself off of the wall and motioned for them to follow.

For the moment, she buried her fears—more or less lost in her focus on navigating the labyrinth. One wrong turn and they would be wandering aimlessly for what could be months. The threat of having to live in a cave with the bunch behind her hung overwhelmingly over her head. A turn to the left and then three to the right and then another to the left. At the next intersection she went straight. Each new corner frayed her nerves a little more. And soon her focus fell away, she had a pretty decent handle as to where she was. The absence of focus left room for new emotions to slip in.

In time Azula found that she was taking everything into account; every sound, every sight, every smell…

At one point there came a sound like rock dragging on rock. Azula jolted at the sound's sudden appearance, her fire sputtering out.

With the flame's death came an assortment of questions; a "what's going on" from Katara, a "why are we stopping" from Suki, and an "are you okay" from Sokka. Azula answered none and relit her flame. She could hear them talking behind her—the usual lively chatter. But amid it she caught Katara whisper, "is it just me or is she being more quiet than usual." The former princess thought briefly of telling them that they too, should silence themselves but she didn't want to make a sound lest she be heard.

As they trooped on, her paranoid hyperawareness only seemed to grow more overbearing. The dark was too dark, and at the same time it wasn't dark enough. If she could see then she could be seen. There was movement in the far corner of the cave, Azula cringed to herself, only to be calmed by the revelation that it was just a baby wolfbat. Somehow the cave guardian's lack of appearance only served to kindle her anxiety. Somewhere deep down she wanted him to show up just to put an end to the suspense and dreadful anticipation that was eating away at her. "Careful over here." She spoke at last, "there's a trapdoor a few feet ahead." She let her flame show brighter. "I'll meet you on the other side of it." She allowed them to pass her by and get the full light of her flame, in a short time she was alone. With nothing but the tunnel's spacy expanse behind her, she felt twice as venerable and small. Eager to alleviate the feeling, she hustled to get back to the front of the group. In her haste she took a misstep; she cried out as her foot slid over the edge, her ankle twisted painfully. With little thought, she let a roar of fire erupt from her hands and propel her body to safety. The very blunder itself was mortifying on its own—a far cry from the grace typical of her. In a quick attempt to save at least some of her dignity, she landed with a degree of poise and a showy bow.

Toph clapped. "That landing looked awesome."

"While Toph pretends that she saw that landing, I would advise that the rest of you to pretend that you didn't see what made it necessary." Though her cheeks were still a soft shade of pink, Azula tired her best to play it off.

"See what?" Sokka asked.

"Exactly." Azula muttered.

Regardless of his own words, the Water Tribesman was the last to let it go. He broke his hold on Suki's hand and jostled to catch up with Azula. "What's going on with you?"

"Nothing."

"You aren't acting like yourself." He pushed. As he usually did when he was trying to console her, he set his hand atop her shoulder.

This time she shoved his hand away. "I'm fine, Sokka!"

"You aren't." He insisted. "Please tell me why you're so on edge."

"I'm always 'on edge'."

"What about this cave has you so…" he lowered his voice. "So frightened."

"I'm not afraid." Azula insisted. She waited for him to coax her out of her lie.

"It's okay you know? To cry, to smile. To be afraid." And that was all, he said no more.

Azula bit the inside of her cheek, dwelling on the echo of their footsteps as they padded along. Something about his lack of pestering continued to make her want to open up to him or maybe it was the way he phrased things. The way he made fear sound so normal. He spoke of it to her, in a way no one else had. For so long she had been scolded and shamed for even the smallest exhibitions of venerability and distress. She made another right turn. But with Sokka…with the gang, in general it was different, she realized. Somehow it was. It took her a moment to comprehend that the difference was an absence of shame and humiliation. And it took longer still for her to realize that the one thing that all of her displays of weakness had in common; while the group as a whole hadn't seen the brunt of her breakdowns, they all got fairly enlightening glimpses. Yet they never lingered on it. They have had so many opportunities to mock and prod her for crying, for stumbling, for the state of her physical appearance. But they didn't. They hadn't brought even brought it up since her face was revealed. They made no mention of any of it.

At last, Azula pulled herself out of her speculation. "It's not something about this cave, it's what's in it."

She must have let too much time pass, for Sokka's reply was a simple, "huh?"

"The thing that's…" she faltered. "That's frightening me."

She had his attention now. As they walked she met his curious gaze. "There's a spirit that protects this cave and the heart pool. I believe that he mentioned being the protector of this entire jungle." Sokka nodded and she continued. "I may or may not have made him a little angry."

"By 'a little', do you mean completely furious enough to…" he motioned to her face.

"That's correct." Azula replied.

"I'm listening." He cued her to elaborate.

"As I mentioned, I've been here before. For that year or so I was missing, I was here. I was looking for either a way out or the heart pool. Of course, I was more concerned with the heart pool."

"What did you want with the heart pool?" Sokka asked.

"To destroy it." Before he could query, Azula answered. "I figured—and based on the spirit's response, I was right—that if I ruptured the heart, I could kill the jungle and the spirits in it."

"Why would you—"

"They helped you and Zuko." Azula answered. "Anyways, I found the heart and tried to stab it. That's when the spirit showed up. He was already pissed, I can't imagine I made it any better by trying to fight him."

"You tired to fight a guardian spirit!?" Sokka asked.

"That's pretty badass." She heard Toph mutter from behind.

"Maybe if I didn't lose." Azula said flatly. "For a while he fought me like anyone else would have, with bending—powerful bending. He threw me to the floor and he extended his arm. Pressed his hand to my forehead. I could see this energy sparkling over his arm…" She shuddered. "There was nothing but raw suffering after that. I've been through a lot of pain, but nothing like that. And then…" she touched her cheek, the soft skin beneath giving her a reassuring reminder that the spirit had made good on his agreement. "Even weeks after I could still feel it. He called it a curse." She finished.

"That sounds awful." Sokka said. He put an arm around her and allowed her to walk closer to him. Much closer than Suki was comfortable with. She decided to let it go, under the circumstances that lead to the gesture.

"He made it undoubtedly clear that I wasn't supposed to come back here." Azula added, there was a certain tremble to her voice. One that told Sokka just how plainly she longed to get out of there. Just loud enough for him to catch it she spoke softly, "I didn't want to." For a second she was silent again. In that hush, she pulled the hood from her head. For the second time that week, Sokka carefully brushed her hair back to get a better look. They came to a brief halt as the man took in what he was seeing—the elegant, fierce face he was well acquainted with.

Well acquainted with, yet he hadn't until then took notice of how pleasant…how beautiful he thought that her appearance was. The only thing that stopped him from reaching out and stroking her cheek was Suki lingering directly behind them.

Once more Azula touched her face. "I'd hate to have it ruined again. I don't want to the pain back either." She let her hand fall back at her side.

"How did you break the curse?" Sokka questioned. This time he couldn't possibly fathom why she was refused him an answer. He supposed he should simply let her get back to leading the way. Even so he felt dreadfully guilty now that he knew the reason for her reluctance. He had coaxed—part of him wanted to say manipulated—her into putting herself at risk. The only thing shielding him from the true force of the feeling was the notion that Azula wouldn't have come if she truly didn't want to. He was completely unaware of just how much influence he had over her.

"I can't believe that you're doing this for us." Katara uttered. "For Aang."

 _For Sokka_ , Azula corrected inwardly. But then again, as much as she detested admitting it, there was some part of her that took a shine to Katara and Toph. "Neither can I." She responded at last. "But here I am."

Katara gave her a warm smile. "He's going to make it because of you."

Azula supposed that if she was going to die, doing it in place of someone else was noble enough. "Yes, perhaps."


	11. A Firelily Withers

The cold was growing chillier still as they reached the highest level of the mountain. The heart pool was in such close proximity now, that Azula could very nearly hear it pounding. The sound both guided her and chilled her to the core. Each beat, along side the lifeblood of the jungle, pumped more panic into Azula's soul.

Each beat brought the memories and feelings of the place closer to the surface, to the point where her head was throbbing again and her flesh was searing.

Katara squeezed Aang's hand. "Do you hear that, Aang? We're almost there."

Even if that didn't offer relief to Aang, it did offer some to Azula. At least she knew now that the pulsating noise wasn't a figment of her imagination, induced completely by stress. No, it was very real. And for that, was as panic instilling as it was comforting. She was ready to ask Sokka to hold her again but Suki was already occupying his arms; even if she wasn't Azula wasn't sure that she was ready to display that much of her soft side yet.

The beating was growing louder and louder still, until it was unspeakably volumeous. They came to stand before a low stooping, craggy passageway. "It's just through here." Azula couldn't tell if the furious beating was coming from in the chamber or from within herself. "There are some pretty sharp stalactites in there so we'll have to crawl most of the way. Towards the end it opens up and we can stand again." She stared into the passageway for a long while before finally dropping to her knees and beginning the crawl. The floor was uncomfortably damp and it was a tight squeeze, even for her she could only imagine how claustrophobic Sokka was feeling. Katara was moving exceptionally slow as she dragged Aang along. She felt terrible for doing so, but could think of no other way to him through with them. The odor of the cave was growing worse too and Azula's hand found something slimy. Her mouth curled in disgust as she visualized what kind of cave crawler she had just crushed. Judging by the "oh gross!" from Katara, Azula came to conclude that the waterbender had set her hand down in the same spot. "What? What's wrong?" Suki asked before grumbling a quick, "oh." They were coming to the part Azula hated the most; it came just before the cave opened up again. A particularly large stalactite drooped down threatening to slash skin. Calling instruction to do the same as she and a warning to not lift their heads for any reason, Azula pressed herself flat against the floor and heaved herself the rest of the way in. Once out in the open, she stood and brushed herself off, not that doing so did anything to take the wetness out of her clothes. She was certain that the cave reached its peak chill—it was colder than she remembered. There was probably a storm raging outside that they were lucky to have missed. Regardless, she wrapped her arms around herself and shivered. Deciding to free up her other arm, Azula picked a bundle of twigs and from her pack and lit them aflame. The new light did little to ease her mind.

"What's taking you all so long?" Despite wanting to bark the question out impatiently, Azula thought better of it and gently—so not to wake what shouldn't be woken—called into the passageway. Her discomfort was growing steadily with each moment she passed by completely alone in the chamber. She repeated her question, that time with a degree of agitation sprinkled into the softness.

"Sokka got caught on the stalactite." Suki answered at last. Azula assessed, based on the huffs between her words, that she was working to get him untangled. "Can I get a little light?"

Azula knelt down and let her fire shine down the passageway.

"I can earthbend it out of the way." Toph offered.

"No!" Azula snapped louder than she had intended. "That's a great way to get the guardian to come check on us." She stooped back down and with her free hand, worked with Suki to try to untangle Sokka. "Alright, we're wasting time." She hissed. "I hope you don't like that pack too much." With that, she lit the strap aflame. Only after the fire had eaten through part of it, did she put it out. With the strap no longer a problem, Suki was able to detach his shirt from the stalactite.

It still seemed to take them a while to get out. She spent a good minute or two alone in the heart chamber with that eerie pulsating sound and the spooky purple glow that bathed the chamber in an odd hue. Azula kept herself to the westmost corner of the chamber, the place furthest from where she'd seen the cave spirit peel himself from the wall. But all the same she felt exposed. For all she knew he could rise up from the ground. She found herself pacing. "Are you guys trying to see how slow you can make this go by?" She huffed. Her nerves were finally getting her edgy and snappy.

At last Katara stumbled out. "Sorry, I'm not good at this."

"Never mind that." Azula dismissed. "The heart pool is over there. Bend the water, heal him, and hurry out of here."

Katara moved to the edge of the pool, ready to bend its portrait-still water. She took a deep breath as the others trickled into the chamber. She dropped into her best bending stance.

"Wait," Azula started. She was about to tell the girl to wait until she vacated the chamber to start. At the last second she decided that she'd rather be trapped in there with the rest of the group than spend any amount of time alone on the other side. She very nearly laughed; how odd that she wanted to be around them. She still had their attention so she finished by removing Aang's shirt. "I would imagine that it's a little hard to heal him with clothes in the way."

"Good call." Sokka agreed.

Azula found herself tense all over as Katara finally disturbed the water. She closed her eyes and listened to the swishing and churning of the liquid. One inhale, one exhale and then one more of each. And another. She felt a hand on her shoulder and jolted, the fire in her palms flaring up. "Dammit, Sokka! Geez, why would you—" She finished with a sigh that was filled with both exasperation and relief. Much to her annoyance she could hear he and Suki snickering.

"Oh man, that was awesome. Do it again." Toph laughed.

"Stop it you three!" Katara hissed. "It's awfully hard to concentrate with you all doing, whatever you're doing."

"Thank you." Azula muttered impatiently.

"Sorry." Sokka mumbled to his sister and then to Azula. "I didn't mean to startle you."

"You're an ass." Azula grumbled, but she let him put an arm around her anyhow. He motioned for Suki to join them and put the other around Suki, giving the Kyoshi warrior a quick peck on the cheek. "You're an ass and a sloppy kisser." Even so she was thankful for the distraction—Katara was now waterbending in full, likely rousing the spirit from his slumber.

"Gee, thanks." Sokka grumbled. "I swear, every time I talk to you a little more of my self-esteem shrivels up and dies."

"Sorry, I say mean things when I'm afraid." Azula confessed.

"So are you in like, constantly living in fear then?" Sokka asked

Azula crossed her arms over her chest and rolled her eyes as Aang took his first unlabored breath.

"It's working." Katara was beaming from ear to ear.

"Do hurry." Azula replied. "We've been here too long." Sokka detected the unease in her voice. He was happy to have relived her of it for a little while, but it seemed to be coming back in full force now that Katara's healing was growing more intense.

They watched Aang sit up. "Katara?" He practically whispered.

"I'm here Aang." Azula had never seen such a tight embrace before. "We're going to go home and you can see Zuko, and we'll tell you all about our adventure. Appa will be so excited to see you and I think Momo will have a few chitters to make!" Azula could see the tears of joy in the waterbender's eyes. For a moment she forgot about the spirit and was muster up some semblance of happiness for them, but she couldn't shove down the rising dread for more than that fleeting moment.

The anxiety must have been radiating off of her, for Suki shuddered in Sokka's grasp. "If Azula's afraid of that thing, then we should be terrified."

"You guys will be fine. It wants me." Azula assured her. "That'll give you plenty of time to run."

"Run from what?" Aang asked as Sokka replied, "we won't run."

"Won't you?" Came the voice Azula had been dreading to hear. It came from all around before circling back to one source. She looked up just on time to see a purple slit appear on the ceiling. There came the sound of a small cave-in as the spirit pried himself away. With a taunting slowness, he descended. She took a step back that was mirrored by everyone in the room—save for Aang who was still trying to get a sense of things. The spirit came lower still, prompting Azula to take another, much wider step. Still his length extended, he freed one arm from the roof of the cave and reached out. Three more steps had her standing in the very middle of the chamber. She was still within arm's reach, the being occupied more space than she could have anticipated. Of course he could, she thought to herself, he was as large as the rocks allowed him. With growing horror, she speculated that he wasn't just a part of the cave but rather, the cave itself. But once more he tore himself completely away from the wall. Before he could fully descend upon her, Sokka threw himself between them. "Noble." The spirit commented. "Noble and poorly executed." Without so much as a glance away from the princess he gave a swift sweep of his stony arm, he sent Sokka across the chamber.

He came to tower over her, "you know, I almost didn't recognize you." He allowed his words to seep in. "Your aura has changed so much, I might not have known it was you if you weren't fool enough to enter the chamber." She held eye contact but refused to speak. "You enjoy challenging me, don't you?" He clasped his hands behind his back with a thunderous thud and leaned in closer. Alarmingly quick, he came to grasp her by the cheeks. He tilted her head to the side and then to the other. "And after I so kindly held true to my word. You couldn't do me the same." He released his hold. "All I asked was that you stayed out of my cave. I imagine that you think yourself above commands."

She gazed at him unwaveringly and pressed her lips tightly together.

His hands were cupping her face again. "Speak." He demanded.

Partially because she didn't know what to say but mostly because she felt as though she'd displeasure him no matter what she said, she remained as quiet as ever.

Too late she recalled her last encounter; the feeling that if she held her silence he would become more enraged. "Last time I couldn't get you to shut up, this time I can't get a word from you." He muttered more to himself.

"It wouldn't make a difference would it?" Sokka spoke, earning him a worried stare from Katara and a warning glance from Suki. "You'll find some way to…"

Azula watched the cave spirit's temper flare to a new peak. The spirit brought an agitated hand to his forehead. "I try. I do try to be patient but you humans make this so difficult. Whatever happened to respecting spirits?" He turned his attention away from Azula to eye Sokka with wicked intensity. She saw the shimmer of energy prickle along his arm.

"Don't!" Azula hollered.

Just like that he was back in Azula's face, and in closer proximity than before. A sick smile spread across his face, spilling a purple glow over hers. "Finally. Was that so hard?"

She could still see the energy radiating over his arm, prompting her to speak again. "It might have been."

"Pray tell, why did you deliberately disobey my only stipulation?"

"I asked her to." Sokka replied.

"I can see that your friend is eager to join you." The guardian tapped his finger against Azula's cheek. She could already feel a bruise forming. A sense of knowingness came over him, "I suppose he's the one, yes?"

Avoiding his latest inquiry to the best of her ability, she answered the first. "I came back here to save the Avatar."

"Four other people and you needed to come with?" He cocked his head.

"They don't know the labyrinth like I do."

The spirit chuckled. "Of course not, no one is as capable or intelligent as Princess Azula."

"As wonderful as it is to know that you think so, they didn't have time to play around in your maze." She hissed. Her heart pounded furiously as the words echoed about the chamber.

His lashings were becoming all too familiar. Her back collided with the cave wall before she could even articulate what was happening. She landed with a painful thud. "Careful, princess." There it was again, his uncanny ability to make her status feel so worthless. To make her feel worthless. "I'm certain that I told you that I'd show no mercy if you came back here."

"So I should have let him die then. He's the avatar!" She snapped, successfully incensing him more.

"I think that perhaps I've shown you too much of it already." He mused aloud. "My punishment wasn't nearly heavy enough the last time." He allowed her no room to sit back up. "You know what's in store and still you provoke me. I see my mistake now." He stooped down closer to her and spoke so quietly that only she could hear him. "I told you to put your worth behind one person, the rest don't matter. I'm willing to bet that you'd sacrifice the Kyoshi warrior in an instant to get him. She is in your way isn't she?"

This time Azula had no clever counter, the worst of it was that she wasn't quite sure that he was wrong. She wanted to think that he was. "You haven't changed any. You're still the same vile creature you were during our first encounter—the rotten thing that I made you." He accused. In her mind, Azula found herself replaying all of the events leading up to that moment. Each and every favor she'd done them had been tainted by some ill-placed word or another or by an argument of some sort. She couldn't even save a life without causing misery in her path. No matter what she did she would always be horrible—she couldn't blame Sokka at all for not choosing her. The cave spirit had a way of making her face truths she couldn't quite shoulder, and that stung perhaps more than whatever he was about to do. She was hit with a pungent sense of helplessness. The amount of times she had felt this way had become embarrassingly uncountable. Indeed, the guardian had done a very good job of sapping her of all of her pride—save for the haughty bravado she put on for everyone else. He caught the sorrowful look in her eye and she thought that he might show the mercy he had promised not to after all. Every bit of the courage she had built up fell away in the instant that he glowered at her with vicious intent. He thrust his hand out, she flinched as his elongated fingers, cool to the touch, made contact with her forehead. Somehow, she felt nothing. All of the fear gave way to a numb sense of calm; maybe that in itself was something to be afraid of.

Sokka saw the hope fleeing her eyes. Her posture went defeatedly limp. "You're wrong about her!" He stood, working past his own fears the best that he could. "She knew what would happen if she came back here, but she did it to help us. She could have left us on our own."

The spirit paid him little mind. Sparks of energy danced down his arm, drawn to Azula as if she were some type of conductor.

"Hogoseki." Aang called. "That's your name right, your spititness."

"He always was good with words." Toph muttered.

"Can I talk to you for a moment?"

Hogoseki withdrew his hand. "I'm listening."

"You know who I am right? I'm Avatar Aang. You know, the guy in charge of keeping balance between humans and spirits. I don't think that I would have made it without Azula. I know she's, uh, difficult sometimes but she did save me." For good measure he added, "pretty big deal right."

For the first time, Hogoseki seemed to consider. His new stance, facing Aang, allowed Azula some room to sit upright once more. Carefully she pulled herself into a more comfortable position. His hesitance also provided the former princess with some space to hope. "A world without you would be chaotic, Avatar. But let's not forget who nearly took away your ability to get to the spirit world." He merged himself back into the wall. Azula let out a premature sigh of relief and got to her feet. "Thank you, Avatar." The words were scarcely out of her mouth when two purple slits opened up behind her. She expected Hogoseki to burst from the wall once more. Instead she found herself being pulled into it, tantalizingly slow. His hold around her belly was crushing, restricting air from properly finding its way to her lungs. Her arms were bound tightly to her sides, which did little to deter her from firebending. She ignited a fire in her palm, an action preformed more or less to make her feel like she was going down fighting. The fire only served to singe her thigh. "Sokka, do something!" She wheezed as Hogoseki's grip tightened.

"Avatar or not, I am a spirit of my word." He covered Azula's face with his free hand.

"You're a hypocrite, that's what you are." Sokka snarled. He knew he would probably regret it, but he rammed his boomerang into what he assumed was the spirit's elbow. He heard a very soft whimper as Azula's knees collided with the ground. This time there was no falter, she righted herself on trembling legs and sent a barrage of fire that missed Sokka by a few inches. She sent another wave of fire, and in the same motion she pulled Sokka out of its path. If Hogoseki hated her before, he absolutely detested her when her fire met its mark. A few large stones clattered against the wall and to the floor.

Hogoseki roared in fury, spilling a wash of purple flame from his mouth. He fixed his glare on Sokka, apparently freeing Azula was the worser of two evils. "You dare contest me in my own cave." He charged at the Water Tribesman with a vengeance. Sokka braced himself for a strike that fell not on him but on both Azula and Suki, who had taken to standing in front of him. He couldn't tell who had taken the brunt of the hit.

Azula rolled onto her back with a pained hiss, she could feel a thick trail of blood oozing from her nose. Her face was a mess of crimson, and Suki's was not unlike her own. She tried to get up but her legs buckled once more, sending her back to the floor.

"Azula!" Sokka shouted. He knelt next to her, her skin was cold and her eyes dazed. He checked on Suki next, finding her in only slightly better condition. He took both of them in his arms; first Azula cradling her face against his chest with special care and then Suki at the crook of his neck. "What did you do to them?"

Disregarding the question, Hogoseki fixed himself into position, ready to bring his fist down upon Sokka only to find his motions restricted. "My heart pool gave you life and this is how I am repaid?" He roared at Aang.

"I'm sorry, Great Hogoseki, Protector of the Valley…" Aang bellowed.

"Your flattery tires me, Avatar."

Aang tried again, "I'm sorry Hogoseki, but I had to protect my friends." He looked towards Azula,"all of them." He paused, trying to gauge the spirit's reaction. "I don't—we don't want to fight you."

"Speak for yourself." Azula grumbled, regaining some of her previous spunk.

"You were generous to allow Katara to heal me, now please, allow us to leave and you'll never see us here again."

"Won't I?" His purple gaze fell pointedly on Azula.

"You have my word." Aang guaranteed. "An Avatar's promise has to count for something right."

Hogoseki curled his stony body around Aang, drumming his fingers atop the boy's bald head. "I suppose that it does." He recoiled, sinking back into the floor. "I will let you leave," he decided as the cave floor closed over his face.

"All of us?" Aang asked.

His purple face reawakened above the passage they entered through. "All of you." He confirmed.

"Thank you." Aang bowed. "You are a kind spirit."

"I am a spirit of my word." He said simply.

Sokka helped Azula to her feet. "Can you stand on your own?"

Normally, a question so undermining of her strength would have vexed Azula, to some degree it still did. But he meant well so she let go of his hand and answered him with a simple nod.

"What about you Suki, you good?"

"Just fine. Thank you, Sokka, for checking." She grumbled, leaving him to question the sincerity of it.

Led this time by Aang, they all filed through the passage, one by one, until Azula was the only one that remained in the dying light of the fire. She couldn't possibly go through, not with the Hogoseki hovering overhead. He would let them all leave, sure. But leave alive? Azula wasn't so certain. She had only two options though, go through the passage or stay in the chamber for the rest of her days. The choice was easy when she looked at it like that. Taking care to avert her eyes from the cave guardian, she ducked down, ready to crawl out. Azula had but a hand in the passageway when a fresh flurry agony exploded in her skull. She clutched her head with such force that her nails broke skin. The torment spanned out, constricting her chest and twinging in her arms. She felt it at all of her chakra points; a sensation like fingers ripping and tearing at her chi. Pinches and stabs seemed to rupture each and every chi point in succession. Each dull pop, elicited a fresh tear and a soft cry. "I did what you wanted." Azula wept. "I helped someone who wasn't me." She gave another sharp yelp as another icy tendril of power licked the root chakra at the base of her spine. "I don't deserve this." She clenched her teeth as the tendril stabbed into the chakra.

"Oh, but you do." Hogoseki, tentatively brushed a tear from her cheek.

Sokka clambered out of the passageway with all the grace of a hippo-cow. A few days ago it might have humored her. But his clumsy scramble to help her only wedged more pain into her spirit.

"You said you would let _all_ of us leave." Sokka demanded. Azula had no idea what he planned to do with his boomerang.

"And she shall, after we finish what we've started."

Sokka's touch—regardless of how tender—sent new and burning ripples of pain over her body. She cried out again. He attempted to scoop her into his arms, sending the pain dancing mostly at her neck and back.

"No!" She practically shrieked. "No, don't move me."

Against all urges, he cautiously set her down on the floor where she continued to writhe before him—shaking more violently than he'd ever seen, a complete mess of blood and tears. And he couldn't even take her hand without causing her more strife. He could see her growing weaker, her eyes seeming to dull.

Azula never knew that it was possible for one person to endure so much torture in such a short span of time. She had to give Hogoseki credit, he had done a number on her. First tearing her from the pride she so strongly armored herself with and then sending her stumbling blindly out of her comfort zone. Outside of that comfort zone she had put her heart on the line and it had split. She wondered if this time it would rupture for real. It felt like it.

Part of her wished for nothing more.

At least then she would finally feel nothing.

Weathering the pain, she squeezed Sokka's hand. It was refreshingly warm. "You still want to know how I broke the curse." Her voice was so terribly hoarse.

"What?" Sokka's brows furrowed.

"Love, Sokka." Azula mumbled. A ghost of a smile crossed her lips. "I had to fall in love." Her eyes seemed to glaze over and her body fell serenely limp.


	12. The Heart Of Moaki

**Just so you all know I actually didn't plan on updating so soon. I meant to give myself a head start for when I had a day off of work. Well my fingers slipped about 1559 times and here we are.**

 **Sexywiccanpotato: First and foremost, good username. I like that. Secondly, I rate your review a solid 10 because me too. There is literally no better way to express emotion than a good 'fuckity fuck.'**

 **Crapshak: Why thank you, brutal is my specialty! It's always reassuring to know that my writing packs such a punch! And thank you for your regular reviews, they give me something to look foward to when posting each chapter and make writing this fic that much more amazing. ^_^**

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 _In a time further back when the world was remotely new a meek spirit was tasked with protecting a young boy—a son he was deprived of the chance to meet. As it were, the boy was just as feeble as the spirit. They counted themselves blessed to be in the company of the lovely Moaki, a well-traveled Water Tribe woman who bore the fishbone pendent of the Northern Tribe. A beautiful woman with elegantly dark skin and deep blue eyes that burned with all the intensity to be had of a Fire Nation woman. During his time in the flesh he fancied her above all else. And to him she birthed a son a striking as she._

 _He took mostly after her, boasting the same complexion, soft cheeks and wide eyes. But those wide eyes were every bit as Fire Nation in hue, as his father's once were. Though strong in spirit, the boy was weak in body—a fragile thing. The spirit father knew at once, that he must stay to protect the boy so he wouldn't meet a fate like his own._

 _"My son." The spirit whispered, caressing the child's cheek. His touch went unfelt, unseen, painfully unnoticed in any way. This hurt the most; he could reach out to his Moaki and to his son, but they would never know it. Would never feel the warmth of his spectral limbs._

 _He could only observe as his sweet Moaki sat by the pool they had built together with water from the spirit oasis back in her homeland. Between her fingers she twiddled the amber firelily he had crafted for her before he proposed. She pressed it to her lips and closed her eyes._

 _"What is that, ma?" Asked the boy, now aged eight._

 _"All of your father's love, spun into a precious stone." She answered, driving the child into deeper confusion. She chuckled at his crinkled nose._

 _"What is it?" He repeated._

 _"A gift from your father before the highwaymen took him from us."_

 _Watching these conversations burned the spirit's heart twice over. Once in passion and love and in a second stroke, they left a yearning. A yearning to live again. To truly be a part of his boy's life. To genuinely be there to support his Moaki—for as strong as she was, she could use the company._

 _For the greater part of the boy's childhood, he kept out of trouble. An occasional tangle with the bread maker was an ongoing matter. But in those days, who didn't make trouble for the baker of bread. As a boy, the spirit had done it, so he couldn't be too hard on his own son. Still it was a means for concern—Agni forbid that the bread baker snapped. So he kept a careful eye on his son and always made sure to prod the bread to ensure that it was not laced with something evil._

 _Moaki did a fine job herself, at keeping the boy out of mischief and mishap. He climbed once, to the very top of a mangrove tree only to find it too damp for his liking. The boy's hand slipped and he came tumbling down. The spirit—though still very meek in power—was quick in thought and action. He had bent the moisture out of the ground and curled it up, ready to catch his boy in its current. But there was no need; Moaki caught the boy. Gave him a good scolding but kissed him on the forehead in the middle of it to let him know that he was still precious. Such was Moaki's way—nothing compared to her passionate chastising sprinkled with displays of love. Sometimes, the humble spirit agreed, a firm tongue was needed to keep a young one from ending up in a horrid place._

 _Despite it all, the boy still loved the trees. He loved the jungle itself. But the jungle at the time only spanned an acer or two. So at the age of ten the boy planted a seed._

 _That seed, in centuries, would flourish greater than the boy could wrap his head around._

 _By that time, the spirit grew to live without fear—though his boy was still a lanky, delicate thing—he had luck on his side. He kept out of trouble's way, so trouble did him the same courtesy. The spirit only had to step in once or twice._

 _Years came to pass and the spirit found his mind filled with more joy, for his boy had found a Moaki of his own. A Moaki who did not go by the name Moaki, but was instead called Nokao. She was a highborn lady of the Fire Nation with fierce gold, almond-shaped eyes. He was proud for his son, the boy had found someone with a soul as lovely as her beauty._

 _Oh the surprise that took the spirit when the truth came to reveal itself!_

 _But it wouldn't; not for another year when the boy turned fifteen. Before then Nokao showered him with affection and with splendid gifts from a place she called 'The Capital'. The spirit enjoyed her tales of the place. It was a city in the blossoming stage with a marvelous palace—supposedly lined in gold—a collection of maple and persimmon trees, and a cluster of homes ranging from great to tiny. "It will one day be the grandest place in the Fire Nation!" She vowed to the boy._

 _As curious of a teen as he was as a child he inquired, "Have you been?"_

 _"To the palace?" Responded Nokao, her voice as slick and elegant as satin. "I have not. But soon, I am to be an honored guest. I hope you will join me."_

 _Oh the delight in his boy's eyes. The spirit was glad to have witnessed it. And the joy in Moaki's eyes as she spied upon them from the crack in the window. All at one the spirit's mind was filled with sorrow, for he was there but not in actuality._

 _His boy though, his poor, poor boy, never did make it to the palace. Maybe if he expected it the dreadfully meek spirit could have prevented it. But with the way Nokao looked at his boy with such kind and dotting golden eyes, how could he have._

 _It was when he leaned in to kiss her. He brushed a cascade of silky black over her shoulder and cocked his neck, trying to find an angle that would have their lips meeting just right. The day was warm, the sun was shining vibrantly for the spirit's son. But it's light could not pierce the darkness behind Nokao's glamour face. The boy had her hands in his. He should have kept them there. No, the spirit thought, it was he who should have been paying more attention. Regardless, the boy let go of her right hand to move her hair and that was when the dagger slipped from her slender wrist and into her palm. And from her palm into his chest._

 _As inquiring as ever the boy asked, "why?" And not another word more. He toppled to the ground and the spirit wasn't sure he'd hear the answer to the last question he asked._

 _As it would turn out, lady Nokao was not as highborn as she pretended to be. She was nothing more than a street ruffian with a pretty face and a fast hand. The silks she dressed herself in were not her own. The makeup accenting her eyes was no more hers than the treasure she sought. "I needed the firelily. So I can truly belong with the people of the palace."_

 _He would have given it to her if she had asked. But she did not because her heart had no love. And when a heart knows no love, it cannot anticipate what treasures a loyal companion would give up for another._

 _His Moaki couldn't take it, when—from the mouth of the bread maker, who also loved the boy well— she heard of her boy's untimely demise. The woman's heart was in shambles and no matter how many times the meek spirit called out to her with words of comfort, they feel on def ears. He watched his Moaki drop the firelily into the pool they had built together so long ago. And then with a chilling wail she tore her heart from her chest and tossed it with the firelily._

 _And so it was that the meek spirit hardened. His hands once light and airy crackled into the heavy stone of a hardened soul. His eyes, once a glimmering and soft glow, dulled to a deep purple as the stone closed around his face._

 _He gave a cry of rage._

 _He would no longer be meek._

 _He couldn't protect his wife nor his own boy, but he would protect the jungle his boy created. He would guard his wife's heart with everything he had. And maybe, just maybe, the love from his wife's tender heart could save another from a fate like their son's._

She was a painful reminder that princess was. A thing of glamor and splendor that Hogoseki hadn't seen in millenniums. Her eyes were hauntingly gold and vibrant. Her hair thick, dark, and silky. Her voice tantalizing like satin. But beneath the glamor he felt something sinister. She eyed the Water Tribe boy with some kind of compassion. But he knew better.

He knew much better.

Lost in sorrow, to him, the princess and Nokao were one in the same. In her eyes he only saw Nokao's; such as the likeness of their shape, hue, and intensity was so startlingly apparent.

All the same, as he looked at the woman curled up on the floor if his cave, he wondered if he was making a mistake in afflicting her so.


	13. Awake But Only In Spirit

**I meant to post this yesterday but the site kept giving me error messages. Sorry for the delay!**

 **Crapshak: Thanks again. I had to give him a bit of a back story; it always bothered me when authors left their villains completely one dimensional. I feel like it's very rare to have a villain that is just evil for no reason.**

 **MadMeijin: And thank you once more. xP Yeah little bit lol. I tried to give him a bit of an understandable motive. But ya know, at the end of the day; cool motive still evil lmao.**

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Cocooned snugly in Sokka's blanket, Azula still hadn't stirred. Not even a twitch or a flinch. The only indication that she had any life left in her was a very subtle rising and falling of her chest. The closer he held her to his body, the better he could feel it. And the better he could feel it, the more reassured he felt. The group had been walking for quite some time, managing to put three days distance between themselves and the mountain which was becoming nothing more than a bleak splotch on the horizon. But three days was a dreadfully long time for the former princess to have remained so still. At some point during their walk, Sokka noticed a thin film of sweat forming on her forehead. It was another reassuring sign that she was alive, but all the same it indicated a high fever of sorts. A sense of guilt still tugged at Sokka's heart. He found himself having quite a miserable time. And Suki proved to be nearly as relentless as the demon who had tormented Azula.

"Are you going to tell me what I did wrong?" He finally asked.

"You know what you did."

Again he asked, "what did I do?"

"What you've been doing since _she_ got here." Suki accused. "I should be the one in your arms."

"She can't really walk on her own right now. Do you want me to just leave her here?" He replied, completely expecting her to bite out a snappish yes.

Instead Suki stammered, "w-well no." Quickly she added, "but you don't have to be the one to carry her."

"Katara has been carrying Aang the whole time; she needs a break. Aang just woke up. Toph doesn't want to carry anything but her own weight. Do you want to hold Azula?"

Again she answered with a straightforward no.

"Well then it looks like I'm Azula's only option." He stole a glance at the woman in question. For once, she was completely blissfully ignorant of the mishap at hand. Her wakeless face was anything but serene though. Her expression was tight, the only movement she made was an occasional grimace.

"Well that's not the point." Suki was growing increasingly more frustrated. Sokka loathed to be the cause of it. "You've been choosing her over me since…since she got here. Like in the cave. We were both hurt, Sokka. And you want to check on her first." He could see the resentment in her eyes. The betrayal.

"Azula took the harder part of the hit." Sokka pointed out.

"No. She didn't." Suki insisted. "We were struck just as hard as each other."

Sokka pursed his lips and blew out a frustrated breath as he ran his free hand through his hair. "You're right, it looked like I was putting you second. In my defense, he was targeting Azula not you so I assumed she got hit harder."

"I'm not just talking about the cave." Suki informed him. "As we were getting there you would blow me off to go talk with her."

"She had no one—"

"How stupid do you think I am, Sokka? I saw her holding you. You fell asleep in her arms and the next day you were all over me!"

Finally at his patience's end he burst, "maybe I wouldn't have cuddled with her if you hadn't been making me feel…I don't know but it wasn't good." He was silent for a moment. "Whatever it was, it didn't seem real. We've been trying to put life into something that's been dead for a while. I think that you knew it too."

"Maybe I did." She said softly as she folded her arms over her chest. "Maybe I just didn't want to let go yet."

"I didn't either…" He confessed.

"Do you love her then?" Suki asked after a few awkwardly quite footsteps.

Sokka stole another glace at the woman resting in his arms. He brushed a finger over her cheek, "I think so. She makes it difficult though."

Suki didn't speak to him for the rest of the day—not so much out of spite as out of having nothing more to say.

With no real hurry, the group called it a night early and filled it with merry talk celebrating Aang's reawakening. Despite it all Sokka found himself in good spirits. There was a sense of reprieve that followed in the wake of his argument with Suki. Coupled with Aang's bright laughter things seemed okay. The boy had a wild tale or two to tell about his fever dreams that he shared with them by the campfire. Sokka busied himself with cooking some hog-monkey meat—their first real meal that wasn't all nuts and berries. That in itself uplifted his mood. Without meat he was just the sarcasm guy and that sarcasm had fast been turning into a form of cynical. He handed Katara the first slice. "Can I get the next piece?" Suki asked as he cut into the meat again.

"Of course." He replied. Just like that she was speaking to him again and their conversations were notably less tense. There was a sense of freshness to the conversation, a lack of pressure that added warmth to the discussion. A lack of pressure that hadn't been there since they started dating. This was right, he decided. After a steady stream of wrong decisions, he had finally made a correct one.

He would sleep in peace that night.

At the break of the morn, when only a few rays of light managed to cut through the trees Sokka was pulled from his sleep. By what, he couldn't exactly place—nothing poked nor prodded him and nothing wailed in his ear. There was only a vague sense that he should be awake. He rolled over only to be met with vivid eyes, gold in description. He was left to assume that she had, in fact, been calling for him. He was sleeping too soundly for her soft voice to break through the thick fog of sleep. "You're awake." He noted.

"My mind is, yes." Azula replied flatly. Her voice was laced with a somber quality he couldn't quite grasp. He felt, at once, as though something was out of place. Though her eyes were very much alive and bright, her stature was still completely limp. Uncannily so.

 **.oOo.**

Azula came to when everyone else was fast out of wakefulness. To some extent she had been awake prior, catching intangible snippets of conversation and twinges of feelings; warmth (completely external in source) and the softness of skin softness. Something fuzzy as well as residual tingles at the base of her spin. Most richly though, she could smell. Wafts of different somethings cut through her daze—meat and resin and a smell that was distinctly Sokka. The comforting smell of smoke and a sweet odor that may have been wisteria. Yet she still couldn't seem to claw herself back into full cognizance.

Fear still lingered somewhere on the fringe of her mind. An ominous sense that if she did climb out of the darkness that she would be met with something threefold horrifying. But she gave it her best effort anyhow, to shake the shroud of darkness out of her head.

When she finally freed herself of her brain's blackness, she was met with the black of night. She found that it wasn't nearly as pitch. Little by little the rest of her senses caught up with her. She could fully feel the comforts of the blanket wrapped around her and the lesser coziness of the ground beneath her. The noise of the jungle filled her ears unabated by delirium. The sound of crickets and owl-bat hoots eased her sense of menace. She also felt a heaviness on her ribcage—an arm she realized. She deduced that it was Sokka who had his arm slung over her—who else, after all, could it be? Some time in the night, sleep had him rolling to face the other direction.

There was another kind of weight too, Azula realized with the absence of Sokka's touch. Her limbs were heavy, all of them. That or she was too weak to lift them. She tried sitting up only to realize that she was weighed down. No, it was different, she mused. She realized with a sprinkle of alarm, that she didn't feel heavy at all. What she felt was nothingness. An absence of weight to lift. She tried to fight the rising panic—he had taken her arms and legs from her, tore them away. That was the first time she called out to Sokka, but the man was deep into his slumber.

She looked down to see that her arm was strewn out in front of her, still sturdily attached at that. The sight took the edge off of her unease. Still she made a second attempt to wake Sokka. If she had the ability, she would have given him a jab in the arm and if that didn't work, a swift kick in the shin. That would have done the job. As it were, she couldn't move a toe, much less her whole leg. The pieces fell into place then; the tingle at the base of her spine, the complete and unrelenting agony at her chakra points, the inability to touch her on internal flame…

Azula's breath hitched. He didn't just take her bending….

She uttered Sokka's name again, this time louder. Still he didn't wake. He wouldn't wake for what would be the longest three hours Azula had ever experienced. The former firebender was alone with her dreads. Alone with a sickly feeling that tied knots in her belly. All she could do was eye Sokka with an intensity so great that her eyes may burst. For the first time since she'd left it, she longed for home and the sense of normalcy that came with it. Even if it meant enduring a beating, verbally or physically, from her father for her incompetence. Her mind didn't have time to drift too deeply into that though. She could see the light filtering through the trees and Sokka, at last, pulled her from internal monolog.

He held a hand to her clammy forehead. She felt unsettlingly cold both inside and out but Sokka declared otherwise. That she was burning up and her cheeks were flushed. "The fever hasn't broken yet." He added.

"Help me sit." Her request fell somewhere in between a command and a question. He helped her into an upright position and propped her up against his chest. Azula didn't realize she was thirsty until he put the waterskin to her lips. When she didn't take it in her own hands he held tilted it up for her. She drank the water within down with a degree of greed. The moisture rested delightfully on her parched lips.

"More?" He offered.

She nodded keenly and the waterskin was at her lips again. Already a part of her was feeling somewhat better. He set the container aside and took her into a full embrace, nuzzling his head on her chin. "Don't you have a girlfriend?"

"Not anymore." He replied simply, eliciting a flutter in her chest. He stroked her bicep with his thumb. She found herself unable to return any of his gestures.

"Sokka, I can't move." She finally vocalized.

His brows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"I can't…" she repeated her voice cracked. "I can't move."

"Not at all?"

"Nothing but my head." Azula confirmed. She imagined that Sokka was relived that he'd never have to worry about her running off again. He readjusted the blanket around her shoulders, indicating that he was done with a soft pat.

"We'll make things right, we always do." His confidence and certainty was contagious.

She parted her lips to ask him how and pressed them together once again. She wasn't in the mood to hear an 'I don't know', not yet. For the time being she was content to soak his optimism in and dwell on the soothing rubs that he offered her arms.


	14. The Worth Of You

**Crapshak: Yeah, I had to give them a bit of a break; Azula's been through a lot. And so has Sokka.**

 **That On3 Guy: That's correct. To be honest I was thinking about having him actually kill her but I didn't want to take the depressing route with her. But I had to come up with something that wouldn't be anti-climatic. Hogoseki's whole thing was attacking her pride where it hurts the most. She thinks very highly of her bending.**

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Sokka still had his arms around her when the others began to stir; none of them actually pulling themselves out of sleep though. He held her steady as the sun slowly inched up the sky with an occasional comment about how brilliant the colors were and how he was glad that she woke up in time to see it with him. "It's nice to have some peace around here." He added, "But I'm glad things were difficult up to now."

"Why would you be thankful for that?" Azula replied, forgetting her situation for a moment, she made an attempt to take his hand and added bitterly, "I for one could have done without."

"If they weren't do you think we'd be here now?"

"Sure." Azula quirked an eyebrow. "There are plenty of things that could have us conversing under this tree."

"Would they have been good? Or would you have been fighting me? Maybe we would have you tied to the tree as our captive—or possibly you'd have me captured and bound. I don't think we would have this…" he motioned to a campfire waiting to be reawakened and the rest of the group sleeping without worry. "You wouldn't have let me hold you like this, would you have? You wouldn't have helped us if you hadn't tried to destroy the heart, would you have?"

Azula took these comments in with a sort of fascination, she had never known him to become so immersed in such speculation, so philosophical. "I suppose not." She confessed. Perhaps out of discomfort she chose not to dwell on it even to herself. For better or for worse she didn't like to admit that she'd changed any. The firebender was decently happy with who she started as and was reluctant to let that go—to let her legacy of fear fade into obscurity. This level of deeper introspection was daunting; she never wanted it. Even with someone to help her though it…especially with someone to help her through it and see everything she thought to keep covered. Truth be told she was still weary of letting Sokka get so close to her—he'd already slipped far beneath her armor. His hold around her middle and his breaths on her neck were a potent reminder of just how unguarded she'd left her walls. More than anything, she was still dreading the moment he decided to bring up her last words to him in the cave before she fell away. It brought color to her cheeks to think about it.

Eventually it would come up. Sokka may act it sometimes, but he was no fool. He could put the pieces together, Azula imagined that he already had. And it brought a curious rift in her mind between the part of her that wanted him to ask if she loved him and the part of her that was content to stay well within what was left of her comfort zone. "You would have Suki if I wasn't here." She commented.

"I don't think I would have." Sokka replied. "If you weren't here I wouldn't have a lover at all."

"Is that I am?" She asked as level as she could manage. She expected him to bring the cave up right then and there.

Apparently, he was done with critical thinking and heavy topics for the day being as his only answer to her inquiry was, "You're something, that's for sure, I don't really know what. I'm just happy you're here." She found herself relieved and dissatisfied all at once. "I think that I should get a start on breakfast. Do you want me to lean you against the tree or do you want to come with me?"

"The tree is nice." She answered.

 **.oOo.**

Sokka watched the fire crackle and pop for a moment before it dawned on him that he had nothing to roast within it. "Can you let the others know that I went to go catch some fish."

"I'd like to come actually." Azula declared.

The look she fixed on him when he suggested that, that might not be practical was horrifying. So he yielded in an instant. In an attempt to prove that he wasn't a complete pushover he slung her gracelessly over his shoulder.

"This is not how you carry a princess." She huffed. Her hair tumbled forward in a way that had her blowing every few minutes to keep it out of her eyes.

"It's how I carry you when you get pushy." He shrugged.

"I hate you." She grumbled.

"You aren't as good at lying as I thought you were."

"I'm not trying to lie, you truly are the most aggravating person I've ever met."

Sokka quickly found that he was having no luck with hunting nor fishing that day. He managed to pluck a few bananas but nothing comparable to a real meal. The fish seemed to leap from his hand and wiggle out of the way of his spear and the hog-monkeys seemed to dart away extra fast. Azula remained where he propped her up; sitting cross-legged against a log. He could see her smiling smugly from where he stood. It didn't matter that she wouldn't be getting any food either, so long as she had the satisfaction of seeing him make an ass of himself. "Don't you dare," he muttered before she could make any critical commentary. He made another plunge for a salmon. It was an amusing feat for her for a while but he could tell that she was growing bored. "Banana?" He offered.

"Not right now, just hurry up and catch us some real food." She waved him off with a yawn. Like that he was back in the water trying to coax a few stubborn fish to him. He was getting nowhere at all. Finally, after what seemed like an hour or so he had a fish in his hands. Unfortunately, he had no time to celebrate his tiny victory for two dull thuds startled the fish right out of his too lax grasp. He scowled and looked over at Azula. He was surprised at all, to find that she was the source of the ruckus. No, his shock came when saw her laying on her side, it doubled when he noticed the hog-monkey laying some feet away from her. "H-how?" He sputtered.

Taking in a deep breath, Azula allowed a small burst of flames spill between her lips. "All I had to do was wait for the right moment. I figured that I should probably just do it, since you can't seem to catch anything."

"I-I had one! You distracted me." He accused.

"Whoops." Azula uttered half-heartedly. "I don't like fish much anyways. This is better." She gave him such a self-satisfied look that he couldn't bring himself to even be annoyed. He was rather amazed really, that she could find a way to accomplish her desires despite all odds. The woman wasn't born lucky—luck had nothing to do with it at all, she was clever by all means. Clever and determined, two of her many allures.

"Alright, you win." He relented. "Let's head back." He paused. "I'm going to need you to hold the hog-monkey." He first took her into his arms and the set the hog-monkey atop her. With such accomplished, he positioned her hands around it and hoped that everything would stay in place. The hog-monkey was a curse and a blessing; it was rather bulky—he could tell that Azula was growing uncomfortable under its crushing weight. If he wasn't breathing so heavily and putting so much focus on carrying the damn thing he may have heard her puff out, "this thing is avenging itself in death." And then, "I hope I can cause someone this much strife after I'm dead." What he did hear, was her sigh of relief when the heft of the hog-monkey was taken from her. He carried it to the fire noting that it very well could weigh more than the princess herself, and perhaps he should have had Azula resting upon it rather than the reverse. He wouldn't say it to Azula herself lest he be bombarded with a flurry of complaining.

For all of the struggle; the creature had provided the most filling meal they've had in a while. Aang of course, took the remaining uncrushed bananas. Sokka took his first bite of the meat and then held some out for Azula.

"Nice catch, Sokka." Toph commented.

"Thank you." Azula replied.

Sokka explaining how it was Azula who took the hog-monkey down did little to stop Toph from calling her Sokka for the rest of the day (and from calling him Azula, at that). As he had been doing, Sokka slung both of their packs over Azula's shoulder and lifted her back into his arms. At least this time around she would make conversation with him, that is if she was in the mood. He was counting on it considering how talkative she'd been with him that morning.

"You're still carrying her?" Katara asked.

"Yeah." He replied simply.

"Is she okay?" Aang asked, seeming to put a few pieces together. Between Sokka having to feed her and their current positioning, it couldn't have possibly been lost on the Avatar that something was amiss. And then remembering that Azula was fully cognizant again he addressed her directly with the question.

"I'm well enough, Avatar." She replied languidly.

For a moment, Aang seemed to study the dusting of bruises on her temple and the thin—still a rather dark hue of pink—slash on her cheek. Her nose, Sokka realized, was also still a good degree swollen. The assortment of injuries mirrored those that covered Suki's face somewhat closely. "That looks like it hurt." He noted.

"Not too terribly." She dismissed. Sokka questioned the sincerity of it. Regardless of what they'd been through, Azula still had a stubborn need to downplay her pain.

"Katara has healed Suki really well." Aang persisted. "The cut is almost gone, you should let her take a look."

"I suppose it couldn't hurt." Azula agreed. "She can look after we settle for the night."

Sokka drew in a breath of respite. It would be good for her to get at least some healing water on her cheek. He was beginning to worry that it would get infected. Not that Azula herself, seemed concerned. He supposed that she was probably more preoccupied with her paralysis.

"Is your foot hurt?" Aang inquired again.

"If you're trying to ask why I'm not walking myself, Avatar, it's because I can't." Azula said. "Hogoseki…" a scowl graced her lips as she spat the name, "took that from me." Her expression dimmed. "I was able to firebend once today—to catch the hog-monkey—I haven't been able to since. I've been trying. It's like I had one final burst of chi and now it's gone." Her smile came back some, "I don't think I was supposed to have done even that."

"I'm sorry." Aang replied lamely. "I can see if I can do anything."

"What can you do about it?"

"If I can take your dad's bending maybe I could give you yours back?" He considered.

"Have you ever done anything of the sort?" Azula questioned.

He hesitated. "Well, no."

"I don't have much to lose." She stated. "You may give it a try after Katara sees to me." Something in her eyes let Sokka know that she had faith in Aang. At least a little of it.

He loathed to see that it amounted to nothing. Later that night when they had their camp set up Aang gave it a try. He found that giving someone bending was a much different feat than taking it. It was, after all, easier to rip something apart than mend it back into one. Azula's mood soured very quickly after that—a false mocking glimpse of hope seemed to be worse than anything else. She was furious too, that she had wasted the last of her ability to bend on such a petty task. Nothing he did seemed to calm a temper so fiery it rivaled the bending she mourned. He was thankful that she could cause little destruction to herself and the world around her.

Sokka didn't witness the height of it until she knew everyone else was asleep. "I should have died in that cave." She hissed at last. "You should have let me…"

He cut her off quicker than he ever had before. "That's just not true. You know that you wouldn't have wanted that."

"Sokka, I'm useless. What's the point in being…" at his wince she spoke with more care "around, if I can't do anything?"

"You've already done a lot. You saved the Avatar, if you didn't things would be chaotic right now. You can still do a lot; you don't need your bending, you don't even need to move, to help Zuko manage the Fire Nation. He's great at it in many ways but he could use a firmer hand, and someone who knows the ins and outs of everything."

"Zu-Zu doesn't want my help." Azula declared. "And I don't want to help him."

"That's right." He muttered more to himself. Zuko was going to have a lot of catching up to do. "He cares about you, you know? He'll be happy to know that you're okay."

"I'm not okay." She finally admitted. "Whenever I think that I am." She paused, "I'm just not." She sniffed, something that was unaccompanied by tears.

"I think that you will be." Sokka smiled. "You don't need your bending to be strong. You don't need it at all. All you need to do is be here and that'll help me. That's useful, right?" When she didn't answer he added, "we also still need your directions to get us home." He ran his hand over the fading bruises at her temple. "You'll be important to me."

"I guess that, that counts for something." Azula swallowed. He looked into her eyes and assessed that it counted for more than just something. "I want to hold your hand." He took her hand and set it over his. Somehow, it counted for everything.


	15. Kissing Petals

**Crapshak: They are actually getting a break in this one so that they have more bonding time. :P**

* * *

 _The air was nippy with frost and the world was dark like a velvet black sheet. There was only a dull drumming that came from all directions. Azula could feel the ice in her hair…in her bones. But she was chilled even more by the feeling of rock grazing her cheek than the thin sleet. She was shivering as the rock trailed down. She couldn't see it anymore than she could see her own hand. But she knew what it looked like._

 _She knew what she looked like._

 _She could feel the sores festering once again. Feel the swells and boils and all of the torment they evoked._

 _She got to her feet and edged through the darkness, away from the fingers that tangled her hair. She got no further than a few inches when she smacked into the wall so she turned in the other direction. She got further but still only found solid rock. Her panic was lifting steadily with each time she hit a wall until she thought to feel along it until she found an opening. Still the dread did not subside. She quickened her pace feeling rapidly against the wall but somehow knew she hadn't moved an inch at all. So she took a step back. The vast openness of it all had her right back against the wall—it would have anyways, had the wall not disappeared entirely._

 _She swallowed hard._

 _Had she been pressing up against the spirit the whole time?_

 _She made off to go back to where she started but found herself terribly disoriented. She might have been back where she began, but there was no way to tell for sure. She wanted to go back to the beginning…_

 _She needed to go back to the beginning._

 _She stepped back again, the ground disappeared beneath her feet. In its place was a pocket of water; this is when her body decided to fail her. She couldn't kick, couldn't beat her arms. She had nothing to keep her from going under. And the water scorched her in and out. Her lungs had no safe place to expand and so they burned instead—calling for her to stop depriving them so. The water seeped into her collection of wounds and seemed to widen them. And then the rock merged with her, it burst from one of the weeping welts in her forehead. The water rippled as the rock crawled over her skin, taking over everything, oozing like blood from all of her sores._

 _All she could hear was laughter._

 _His laugher._

Azula's body jolted, a mocking phantom of a movement. She was breathing hard and in a cold sweat. This was the third variation of the dream since she'd left the real cave, and was the most twisted yet. The most vivid; she could still feel twinges of pain that wasn't really there. If she had the ability she would have touched her face just to make sure…

For a fleeting moment, she thought of waking Sokka. She decided against it, she couldn't pester the man every time her mind decided to drag this thing back up. Agni, how she wished it would stay where she put it—buried deep in the deep recesses of her brain.

With nothing else to do she stared at the sky, thankful that they had chosen to camp in the clearing this time. The stars kept her company for some time and she watched a cloud drift over the moon, lulling her back to sleep despite her reluctance to go back there. The following awakening was a more pleasant one. For the first time during their venture, Azula was the last to wake. She was nearly certain that Sokka hadn't even intended to wake her. He simply scooped her quietly back into his arms. This time he positioned one of her arms around his neck. "How did you sleep?" He asked upon realizing she was no longer in the act of it.

"Could have been better." She downplayed it.

"Why is that?"

With no other means of occupying the time, she filled him in some, leaving out the grisly details she didn't want to recall again.

 **.oOo.**

"How is she doing?" Katara asked when they came to stop at a waterhole. Sokka was in dire need of refilling his waterskin, and his sister shared the problem. She peered over her shoulder at the fire princess who was lounging languidly against the small boulder Sokka had propped her up against.

"She seems like she's doing alright to me. Why don't you ask her?" He was trying to encourage them to converse with her more since she didn't appear to be making the effort herself. "She could probably use a little more water on those bruises."

Katara finished filling her own waterskin and then wandered over to Azula. "Do you mind?" She asked lifting the container.

"Go ahead." Azula granted.

With a steady hand, Katara held the water to the former firebender's abused skin. "Sokka says that you're doing better."

"Comparatively speaking." Azula confirmed, her eyes betraying nothing but calm. "I would be better if I were at home, using the royal spa…"

"You'll be there soon enough. I could go for a trip to the spa." She agreed.

"Perhaps when we get back to the palace."

Katara had to admit that she was taken aback by the offer. She hadn't considered that the princess regarded her assistance very much. She didn't think that Azula had put any appreciation into it at all. If she were being honest, she was still somewhat under the impression that Azula thought of her as just another person meant to do her bidding and that her help with Aang was a means to an end. "That would be really wonderful, I haven't gone to the spa since Ba Sing Se with Toph."

She had Azula's attention at that, "Toph?"

"I had to drag her in and she spent the whole time cringing and startling the workers." Katara explained.

Katara drew the water away from Azula's forehead and moved it to her cheek and to a spot just beneath her eye. Her stoic expression was unwavering as the water tingled around the cuts. From the looks if it the healing process was going well; the welts didn't run as deep or as long and the bruises were fading remarkably fast. The swelling on her nose was going down as well, even without aid. Katara had been so preoccupied with Suki's injuries that she had been neglecting Azula some. It was well to know that she was doing alright on her own. "Aang is doing well, by the way." She noted cheerfully.

"It's good to know that I didn't sacrifice my bending for nothing." Azula replied, at this her eyes grew a degree distant but other than that, her face betrayed nothing.

"Let me try something." Katara offered.

"Go ahead."

Katara hunched her over, pushed her shirt up, and spread the water over her back. She focused much of her energy at the base of the fire princess' spine. She swirled it in careful circles at each of her chakara points. Azula's stance was growing unsteady she pitched forward forcing Katara to momentarily abandon her bending to wrap one arm around the woman, just under her chest. Holding Azula in place, she picked up where she left off. The former firebender's breathing was level, she emitted an air of indifference.

After a few moments more, Azula remarked, "I still don't feel anything."

"I'm not quite done." Katara replied. "I'm going to lay you down. Just a moment." She moved rummaged through her luggage and pulled out a small pillow. She placed it before the princess and then laid her head upon it. "Is this comfy?"

"Comfortable enough." Azula replied.

Starting at Azula's shoulders, Katara ran her hands down her back in tedious circles, applying the most pressure where she felt that her chi was most blocked. She continued the massage until Aang informed her that the rest of the group was ready to depart. "How do you feel now?" She asked as she helped Azula up.

"It depends what you mean by that." Azula answered. "I still don't feel the warmth." She made a useless attempt to hold a hand to her belly where her fire chakra used to pulse—in its place there was a kind of uncomfortable coolness at her core that she couldn't seem to rid herself of. A chill that consistently radiated from her middle outward. It may have been that the cold wasn't there at all, she simply felt the absence where heat used to reside. "But I must say, I feel less sore. I can almost pretend that I haven't been tossed around a cave and sleeping on the floor. Almost."

"I can give it another try in the morning if you'd like?" Katara offered.

"I suppose that it couldn't hurt." Azula replied.

"You two ready?" Sokka asked.

"We are." Katara confirmed.

This time Katara helped to lift Azula onto Sokka's back with her arms over his neck and her chin propped atop her arm. This position offered his arms a much-needed break and offered her a new kind of closeness.

 **.oOo.**

As they walked on Azula listened to the conversations happening around them. Toph, Suki, and Aang spoke cheerfully about their plans for when they got home while Katara lingered back by she and Sokka. The pair spoke of how they missed the frosty temperatures of the Water Tribes and the best places to view the penguin migration. Knowing very little of the poles, Azula kept quiet and listened in, trying fully taken in bits of information she found particularly noteworthy. "Maybe one day we can watch the penguin migration together." Sokka offered.

"There have been a lot of maybe's lately." Azula noted. "I'd like to get out of this jungle before anything." Her tone softened a little. "But I suppose if Zuko gives me more hassle than I feel like putting up with, I'll come to the Water Tribe with you." After this she went back to merely listening in. The waning sun beat hotly against her back, but she welcomed its scorch touch. She could sense the beginning of a sunburn on her neck—at least she'd be able to feel some kind of heat. By the time they made it to their next stopping point, she found her assessment to be correct. Her neck was a soft pink and quite tender to the touch. After a light supper Sokka wandered with her a decent distant from the rest of the party.

"How are you feeling?" He asked.

"I do wish that you all would stop asking me that. I'm not so easy to break, I'm not fragile. Anyways, if I'm not doing at least decent, you'll know."

He set her down beneath a banyan. "I didn't say that you were." He replied before taking a seat in front of her. "It's just that, I like when people ask me how I'm doing. It makes me feel like I'm cared for, ya know?"

"Noted." Azula replied, well aware that she had never actually made an inquiry about Sokka's mood.

A faint and balmy breeze rustled the palm fronds. Azula listened to the sound of their leaves brushing against each other. Near and far, clusters of fireflies blinked on and off. One of them landed upon her forearm, casting a speck of a yellow glow on her skin. "Brush that off of me will you?" She requested. Instead he took her hand, turned it palm up, and set the tiny insect upon it. "Okay, you moved it that far, how about setting it down next to me." She suggested.

"It'll fly away eventually." He winked. Until then, he watched the bug crawl towards Azula's fingertip. When it found no more skin to walk over, it spread its wings and with a blink of farewell, it took towards the night sky. He watched it drift off until it faded into nothingness, catching one or two more yellow flashes before he could see it no more. "Fireflies are one of my favorite parts of the Fire Nation, you know."

"I guess I enjoy them well enough when they aren't on me." Said Azula. She watched a few more of the insects drift by each twinkling on and then off again in perfect sequence. "They're precise," she noted, admitting to herself that she was rather captivated by their soundless communication. When one flashed on, another would respond, and then one further off, and the first would blink again. She wondered at their ability to send messages through action alone. "They seem to understand each other…talk to each other," she vocalized her observation, "without saying anything at all."

"See, you have more in common with them than you thought." He grinned.

"Is that right?" She asked.

He didn't feel the need to elaborate, she seemed to understand anyways. She turned her face skyward, the moon put a certain twinkle into her eyes. An enchanting spark of life. Its beams cast an almost ethereal light over her pale skin. Much as he did upon catching her after she had run away, he took her wrists in his hands. This time he stroked smooth, comforting skin. Despite the awful lack of fire in her grasp, her hands were pleasantly warm. Sokka removed his hand for a moment to let his hair down—a style that Azula like on the man. "It suits you." She remarked. "To wear your hair like that."

"Thanks." He smiled. "I'll have to remember that, it'll probably been another few weeks before I get another compliment."

"That's correct." Azula agreed. "You only earn them about that much." Truthfully she had an assortment of them lined up for him, but she didn't fancy gushing on and on about it. Among the things she wanted to comment on were the hue of his eyes under the moon—of course the moon would look right reflecting in the eyes of a waterbender, the charm his smile held, and mostly, the care he put into his caress. Though he seemed to be distant somehow; as if deep in thought.

"Do you have something you want to say?" She asked.

He was torn between two replies; "do you?" and "no, but I have something to ask." He went with the prior.

"What do you mean?" She returned the question. Deep down she knew that he was asking if she wanted to be more forthcoming as to weather or not she truly cared for him…truly loved him. She watched him pick a single blade of grass and twirl it between his fingers, something that she herself wanted to do.

"In the cave…" he started. Azula knew where the conversation was bending to and she wasn't entirely sure if she wanted it to yet. "You said that, to break the curse or whatever it was, you had to fall in love."

"I did, yes." Azula replied, already feeling a tingling in her stomach. She felt inclined to add, "it didn't have to be romantic. As long as I found someone I genuinely liked being with."

"Who was it?" He asked.

"I think that you already know the answer, Sokka." She replied as another gentle gust of wind came to dance through her hair. He locked his fingers between hers. Unable to return the gesture, she waited for him to press her fingers down.

He leaned in, pressing his forehead to hers. Keeping his voice tantalizingly low he responded, "I think I do, but I want to hear it from you."

"It was you." She replied, the tingling in her belly reaching a new intensity. No matter how or how much she said it, it always seemed foreign to let such words fall from her lips. But she let them slip regardless, "I love you, Sokka."

Satisfied with her answer, he let her arms fall around his neck and wrapped his around her waist. She closed her eyes, feeling his breath on her neck and his cheek against hers. A swarm of fireflies dazzled passed, she could feel them brush against her exposed arms as Sokka's hands brushed her sides. Mirroring her, he closed his eyes. He held one of his hand on her cheek, her bangs twisting about his fingers. And so it was, that beneath the very tree they had—together—fallen asleep under, was the same tree their lips met for the first time.


	16. A Psychedelic Retreat To The Dreamscape

**Crapshak: Thank you. There's always something waiting around the corner. The question is; is it good or bad?**

* * *

 _Blood slipped between her rigid fingers. She couldn't tell where I was coming from or if it was even blood at all. Somehow it felt too clumpy to be blood._

She jolted, a phantom of a movement. Her eyes fluttered.

 _Her body grew more stony—stony, heavy and impossible to move. Yet she could continue to bleed._

She gave a soft whimper.

 _Her face was completely transformed now, into cracked stone that threatened to crumble and fall away. Through the cracks oozed a steady stream of crimson that pooled at her feet. She was crumbling, she knew it by the sharp pangs that accompanied the sound of rock clattering to the floor._

She felt him pull her closer, his head atop hers. His scent filtered in and the dream faded into obscurity and then into something else altogether.

 _She was still in a cave, but instead of nearly pitch darkness, a hole in the ceiling sent curtains of light across her face. The liquid beneath her bare feet was the color of polished diamond. She supposed that it should have been cold, but it wasn't. She walked forward, the sound of her feet splashing through the water echoed about the cave chamber creating a surreal auditory perception that let her know she must still be fully enveloped in a dream. She continued to follow the path in which the water flowed, until it opened into a body of water that filled the back of the chamber. It must run beneath the slit in the wall and would probably open up once again into some bigger expanse some miles away._

 _Gems in hues of azure blue and aquamarine dazzled the ceiling, she could see them on the surface of the water. Beneath the surface she could see—in place of kelps and corals—clusters of spiky diamonds spurting from rocks with tiny pearl dots in the crevices. She would have to take care not to shred her feet on them as she swam. There was a certainty though, a serene certainty, that she wouldn't do so. They were down pretty deep anyhow. She slipped her dress off and fell in._

Azula found herself thankful that she only remembered the nightmare in bits and pieces. Though she was less pleased that she didn't recall anything that happened after she had removed her dress. Mayhaps, nothing happened at all. She lay on her stomach, her hair fanning out over her shoulders and rippling down her back. Her head rested upon her arms as she took in the charming sounds of the sunrise and the delicate trickling of a nearby creek, she could almost pretend that it was the sound of the water she had followed in the realm of dreams. At some point during the night, Sokka had slipped his hand under shirt and was rubbing small circles on her back. Perhaps that was the stimuli that fueled her dream, for a small snippet replayed itself; _arms coming to loop around her waist, she could feel careful hands caressing the skin of her naked back._ She closed her eyes again and tried to recall it in full. Her attempt amounted to nothing but a faint recollection of a feeling. Dawn had not quite broken yet; the sky was still a rather deep shade of blue. She repositioned her head and closed her eyes again, hoping that the dream would find her again. She was not asleep though, so it refused to come to the surface again.

"Good morning." Sokka greeted sleepily, giving her bicep a squeeze. She supposed that was a decently nice thing to wake to. He helped her sit up and kissed her nose. "Do you want me to brush your hair?"

"Try not to snag it." She answered.

He shuffled through her bag and found her comb. Once he had her hair fastened into a ponytail—he couldn't manage to get it into the topknot she desired—they were on their way.

"What are you going to do when you get home?" Aang asked.

Truth be told, she didn't think she would make it out alive, much less make it home. So she made no plans, what use had a dead woman for plans? "I'll do whatever I feel at the time." She replied with a vague feeling Zuko would be a part of whatever it may be. "Though that trip to the spa I mentioned to Katara might be a good place to start." She didn't feel up to thinking about how to break the news of her condition to the whole of the Fire Nation. At the very least, she'd have more hands to help her about, when she got back to the palace.

"Katara would enjoy that." He agreed.

"I could use a spa, that's for sure." Suki added.

"Of course." Azula replied flatly. Even with nothing to envy of her, Azula still felt a residual resentment of the woman and she couldn't quite seem to shove it aside. She could sense that the feeling was mutual, her words had been laced with tension. The Kyoshi warrior had to hold her at least a degree responsible for the upheaval of her relationship. It became especially clear when Sokka shifted her position in his arms.

The following hour came with boughs of unfounded paranoia to a level she hadn't felt since the comet. Accompanying the former firebender was a vague sense that something lurked between the trees with sharp and watchful eyes. She couldn't be sure of its intent. Once or twice she spied a tumble of rocks moving alongside them but the instant she blinked was the very same instant they hid themselves once more. She could have sworn she was over the dull sense of horror after she had exited that dreary cave. The worst of it had passed, it had to have, she reminded herself. What else could he possibly want vengeance for? She squinted into the deeper jungle, trying to observe something…anything that could verify her jittery frame of mind.

"We need to take another break." Sokka cut through her concentration.

"We just took one ten minutes ago." Katara objected.

"We told you that if you had to use the bathroom, to do it then." Toph added.

"She doesn't look so good." Sokka stated. It took Azula longer than it should have to realize that he was speaking of her. She wondered all at once if her delusions were the product of another wave of fever. Her focus on finding the source was so intense, she scarcely noticed the dizzy feeling coming over her. It made little sense, she felt fine earlier.

"We should have…" His words were growing muddled and unclear to her ears. "Rest more." His voice was distant and muffled, as though someone had stuffed cotton into her ears. The last thing she caught before completely falling away was, "pushing her too hard." Her head fell back, as limply as the rest of her.

 _She was in her cave again. This time a draft ran through the chamber, carrying on it the scent of mint. She didn't question it, the coolness felt well on her uncovered skin. With suddenness she came to a realization that was both peculiar and mundane at the same instant; she couldn't feel her hair sweeping down her back. She lifted a hand to her head and ran her fingers through her hair, finding that it's length only spanned as far as her neck._

 _She stepped forward, beckoned by a triangle of teal orbs. The drifted leisurely to the edge of the water where two bobbed up and down and one dropped to the very depth of the vast pool and then rose to the very top of the cave. This time before entering the pool, she dropped to her knees to more closely inspect the diamond cluster. And this time they offered a brilliant blue luminesce, not unlike her own fire. If only she may reach it._

A considerable amount of time had lapsed since Azula retreated back within herself. They had found a familiar stopping point and had the princess splayed upon the ground, under a tangle of roots. Katara had since waved the other three off to occupy themselves elsewhere. It was just she and Sokka who remained at her side. The water was murky, but it sufficed. Katara purified it to the best of her ability and hovered it over the Azula's forehead.

 _She watched a few beads of water slip like tears from craggy stalactites. Most fell into the pool, a few rose back in the direction they had come, and one fell onto her palm. Azula held it out in front of her and for a moment simply observed it, waiting for it to do something fascinating, something noteworthy. But all it did was sit there, sparkling in her hand. She pressed on it with her pointer until it dried away. Her dress still lie in a silky heap on the floor. She slipped her body into the water again._

 _It was warmer this time._

 _More inviting._

 _And the crystals glowed beneath her. All of them, in many hues._

 _But she had her eyes on one._

Katara had the princess submerged neck deep, with Sokka to hold her head above water. For a few minutes the waterbender worked around Azula's clothes. She didn't particularly need to be precise yet. After a few minutes of a general, full body heal, she instructed Sokka to bring her to the shore. This time she stripped the princess down as much as she could without being invasive. She cleared Azula's skin of most of the water that previously drenched it, leaving only a very particular set of trails.

 _Azula could see her own shadow at the bottom of the pool, watching it glide along with her as she kicked herself away from the southmost wall. She held both hands in front of her and drifted as far as her initial push allowed. And in the same way many dreams don't make sense; she could, at the very same time, observe herself from a bird's-eye view. As she drifted beneath the surface, she came to roll onto her back before resurfacing. What was left of her hair flowed with the water in lazy S's. There came the sensation of spectral fingers running over her chi points. From her normal sight she could observe nothing, but with a focus on her bird's-eye vision, she could see those opaque fingers trailing about her slender figure. Her body became a maze of intricate glowing blue lines. She arched her back and let herself fall beneath the water._

 _The crystal..._

 _Her crystal, was pulsing so bright._

The time at which she woke—in only the most partial sense—could have been the deep indigo of dawn or the navy shade of night's beginning. She couldn't gauge it for certain and was too sleep-dazed to take the other sleeping forms into account. She longed to know if her fingers had come to close around the crystals. But much like the first instance, she was drawing a blank. All at once the desire to return to that place devoured her. Having been not very much awake in the first place, her heavy eyelids fell blissfully shut again. This time she found herself in luck—though choppy in timeframe—the dream came back to greet her as soon as she found herself fully asleep once more.

 _She was floating on her back. A different pair of hands where underneath her body, it seemed as if the other was trying to teach her how to float. She was staring at the moon through the hole in the ceiling. She let out a breath and watched it float into the air as a sparkling puff of silvery smoke. She felt a sense of ease that she hoped to keep forever. His hand was on her tummy, and he was moving it slowly towards her chest. She cupped her own hand over it. His other hand was at the base of her spine. She could still feel the pleasant tingle left there in the wake of the phantom fingers. His touch came to rest atop her chest. She thought he might do more, but instead he held her there, waiting for her to make the first move. Even in the world of dreams she hadn't the faintest clue how to navigate such a situation. So instead she let Sokka do the work. He didn't take things where she had expected him to—perhaps because she hadn't yet the true and physical experience to create such a fantasy. Instead he swam with her to the bottom of the pool, taking extra care to avoid the crystalline hazards at the bottom. It was no longer aglow, but she could spot various clumps of quartz in every direction. She lost sight of her diamond-pearl bunch._

 _She shouldn't have been able, but she opened her mouth and took a successful breath. They were free to stay beneath the shallow for as long as they had interest in doing so. He took her hands in his and spoke to her. She couldn't hear the sound of his voice nor read his lips. But the message appeared clear in the bubbles. He was asking her to show him her fire. Azula let the fire spray from her hands. If she couldn't have it in the wakeful hours, she would make a show in the world of dreams. From her hands she unleashed an assortment of animals from the common dog-frog to the most fantastical dragons. And for effect, she sent out zigzags of lightening to flow within the currents. The bolts hung suspended in the water as the fiery animals danced with a life of their own. Into the air, she sent a hawk of blue. She and Sokka watched it rise from the pond and presumably out of the hole in the ceiling. He gave her a warm smile._

 _An encouraging one. She had never used her bending for anything but battle or the practical. Never used it for the sake of performance. She wished she had._

 _Sokka guided her to the very bottom of the pool, his hair rising and dancing like seaweed as he pressed his lips onto her own._

 _They came back to the surface again, both of them floating on their backs. He locked his hand with hers. From above came a rain of silver firelilies. Again, she had the view of someone gazing from a war-balloon. Beneath them a fever of stingrays flapped past, leaving behind clouds of swirling luminescence in the colors white and blue. Azula could best compare the sight to the time she had dropped a tinse of ink into her glass of water. The clouds came to drift around her body. She extended her arm towards the hole in the ceiling and ignited another flame. With the light around her and the flame licking her palm and a faint blue glow growing beneath her flesh, Azula felt sublimely ethereal._


	17. The World In Shades Of Gold

**Crapshak: Thanks, I enjoyed crafting Azula's dream world. In general I like adding touches of fantasy to things so it was really fun to work with. Her dream was definitely a nod to her longing. Lol yeah, ominous is my favorite tone to set.**

* * *

It was still dark, just a few minutes past midnight when Azula woke with her cheeks flushed the deepest scarlet. She had her share of dreams, as anyone else, but never had she dreamt of something of that nature. Even though it would be utterly impossible for anyone but herself to know of the dream—unless of course she chose to discuss it—she still found herself feeling faint twinges of embarrassment, amplified by that she kind of wanted to return to the dream. Already she missed the sensation of an unburdened body. She could have sworn that she still felt the sensations of the dream lingering about her. Could have sworn that the phantom fingers were still tickling her chi points, brining life to them. She wouldn't allow her hopes to rise very high. This time Sokka slept with his hand atop hers—the one that rested in front of her face anyhow, the other was tucked beneath her head. The sensation there was a mix of pins and needles as well as a sort of coolness. It set in then, that her hair was damp. All at once, she wondered what had happened after she fell asleep…

No, not asleep.

She blacked out.

The recollection forced her to abandon her speculations of how she'd gotten wet as she tried to recall how she had come to pass out, what she was doing before then, and where she was currently. For that matter, she pondered how much time could have passed while she'd be asleep. She let out a deep exhale and opted not to fret over it, odds where she'd get her answers when the others woke up.

Azula wanted to look up at the stars. Unfortunately, they hadn't positioned her in any way that would allow for it that time. Instead she'd have to stare straight in front of her, not that Sokka was an awful thing to see. With little else to do she counted the freckles she didn't know he had on his cheeks and neck. Two on his left cheek and three speckling his neck. His expression appeared slack and restful. She wondered what he was dreaming of, and whether or not the subject matter was as pleasant as that of her own dream. She yawned, hoping that sleep would reclaim her for at least a few more hours. But it did not. For a decent amount of time, she went untroubled—to the point where she had concluded that even if she couldn't get back to sleep, she was resting fairly well just lying awake. She lay undisturbed for somewhere near an hour before a rustling caught her attention. She had no hope of seeing it over Sokka's shoulder, regardless she strained her ears and listened. The noise was fast growing nearer until whatever it was, was perched just on the other side of Sokka. Giving no warning at all, whatever it was sprang up and landed upon her arm; without thinking, Azula flinched, sending the poor creature jumping right onto Sokka's face where she could then assess that it was no more than a squirrel-toad. Before she could truly process what had occurred, Sokka bolted up, boomerang at the ready. The squirrel-toad was propelled once again onto Azula, where it burrowed beneath her sleeve. "Wh-what was that." He sputtered looking from one side to the other.

"Relax, it's just a toad-squirrel." Azula replied.

He let out a dramatic sigh of relief and flopped back onto his sleeping bag.

"Sokka, would you mind getting it out of my shirt?" She asked. "Sokka?" She groaned, clearly the man had fallen back asleep the minute his head hit the pillow. She partially envied that ability. The toad-squirrel squirmed around, it's tail tickling the skin it touched. Once again, left to lie awake, things registered in her mind. She had flinched, it was a rudimentary instinctual movement, but a motion no less. She tried to close her fist. She stared at her fingers, seeing that they only twitched. She tried thrice more with the same results. And a fourth time she was able to bring her pointer halfway down. She gave it a fifth shot. Exerting more effort than any person ought to have, she had her pointer pressing against her palm and then the finger next to it, and the one next to that. The reset was like working through rust; though stiff and somewhat sore she flexed the rest of her arm. The toad-squirrel, not as thrilled about this discovery as Azula leapt away from her arm and onto her stomach. Concentrating on pulling herself upright, the princess scarcely noticed it. At last she was sitting up, the toad-squirrel plopping into her lap. She smiled to herself feeling childishly elated, perhaps that's why she allowed the critter to stay where it was. Holding herself upright was another matter, in her delight she had been too abrupt. As it would seem, her body was no longer in shape to do so, having been so still for so long. She lowered herself once more choosing to dwell on the revelation that she could move again as opposed to the dull ache in her back and arms. She rolled back on to her side, this time taking the care to move the toad-squirrel first. As soon as she was cozy again, it delved back beneath her shirt. For the time being she ignored it.

"Sokka, I can move again." She called softly. The man didn't so much as shift. "Sokka?" She tried again, receiving just as little of a response. "Sokka?" Just the sound of his breathing.

Azula tried once more before gracing his shin with a swift kick. Swift, but to his luck, rather weak. Though it was enough to startle him awake. For the sake of being a pain in the ass she pretended to be asleep, finding entertainment in watching him to figure out who had kicked him. His gaze settled on the former firebender. "Can I help you?" She asked with a feigned innocence.

"I just got kicked and I want names." He was brandishing his boomerang again.

"Did you ask the toad-squirrel?" At it's mention, it's head came to emerge from the hem of Azula's shirt.

"You can't tell me that, that little thing kicked me that hard." He grumbled. She let him bask in his confusion for a few moments more.

"You wouldn't wake up so I kicked you, Sokka." She confessed.

His puzzlement grew.

"I can move again." She added. To demonstrate, she plucked the toad-squirrel from her shirt and stroked it's cool, moist head with her pointer.

"And you're already abusing your powers."

"That's right." Azula nodded, kicking him again. She managed a little more force, but still nothing she would normally boast of.

"So it worked then?" He said more to himself.

"What did?"

"Katara tried healing you again. She did it differently this time, since we had more water." He motioned towards the mangrove.

"That explains why my hair is wet." She muttered, running a hand over it.

"Yup." Sokka agreed. He rested his hand on her ankle. "I told you that things would work themselves out, you don't _always_ have to make it happen yourself. Sometimes it's nice to just take a more passive stance."

"I disagree; if I didn't push myself to get up then it wouldn't have happened." Azula pointed out and at the cocking of his head she elaborated, "I don't think I was meant to move just yet. It was…tedious to move my pointer at first. I didn't think it was going to work." She looked up at him, "you can't just wait for things to happen."

"Maybe not after a certain point, but there are some things that you can't control. It's about not stressing over it and acting when you're supposed to act."

"You sound like uncle." She rolled her eyes.

"So I'm right." He elbowed her on the arm.

"You're a pest, that's what you are." No less, she beckoned him to lay closer to her.

The full weight of her joy didn't set in until she had her head nuzzled deeply into the pillow with Sokka pressed against her. In the morning she would be able to walk on her own again. Her smile grew. He kissed her forehead and went back to sleep. She herself did not, she was all too eager to be up and moving again. At least this time her sleeplessness came from anticipation as opposed to anxiety. Anyways, it bothered her none; she didn't mind lazily running her fingers over Sokka's chiseled arms. If worse came to worst, the toad-squirrel would keep her amused.

The day came faster than she anticipated, not that she was complaining. She waited for Sokka to sit up first before moving herself. This gave her time to take notice of the toad-squirrel, it had moved maybe a few inches since she last looked at it. At last Sokka was on his feet, so Azula—with a notable degree of struggle—heaved herself up as well. Her next task was to actually stand. With much care, the princess urged her sore legs to move and she slowly came to rise. The princess found herself rather unsteady at first and held her hand out for Sokka to take. With his other arm around her back, he helped her find some balance and at last she was at her full height. Still, Azula found that her legs were shaky from a lack of use. "Walk with me to the firepit?"

"Of course."

Azula found herself putting most of her weight on Sokka, as the strolled towards the burnt out fire.

"You alright?" He asked.

Azula gave an affirmative nod. "I just have to move around for a bit."

"Where do you want to go?" He asked.

"Doesn't matter, I just have to walk." She replied. So it was that he accompanied her to the mangrove tree. The came to stand beneath the roots where water collided with sand. By the time they reached it her legs were pulsing some and she leaned herself against one of the massive roots.

"You know, this is where I first noticed that you were following us."

Azula quirked an eyebrow. "You should have said so, sleeping on those roots was terribly uncomfortable, surly no place for me to be sleeping." She gave her bangs a nonchalant flick.

Sokka came to lean against the tree with one hand positioned near Azula's neck and the other on his him. "I'll be sure to invite the next person I catch to come sit with us by the fire."

For a while the princess left the conversation at that, choosing to stare at the lapping lake waves. She took the care to occasionally lift a leg as mused to herself about whether or not the lake could possibly flow into the mountain at some point. She wondered if it was somehow, by some extension connected to the heart pool—that could very well explain the success in its waters healing her. She heard the rustle of Suki's sleeping bag. She pushed herself away from the tree and grasped Sokka's hand.

"Where are we going?"

"Back to the fire pit." Her strides were still decently unstable but she pulled away from Sokka anyhow.

"Got it?" He asked.

"I think so." She replied and walked the rest of the way to the firepit unassisted. She knelt down before the charred logs. She closed her eyes and drew in a deep breath. Holding her hand out, she tried to call forth her beloved flames. Still none came to answer her desires.

"I'm sorry." Sokka apologized on behalf of the fire that refused to ignite.

"I suppose I should complain too much." Azula sighed. "I was already asking a lot in wishing to walk again."

Sokka was nearly certain that such would be the end of her good spirits, but the former firebender surprised him. She made fairly pleasant conversation as the walked along. On occasions she would stumble, but her voice never seemed to falter as her legs did. She would right herself and keep moving as if nothing had happened at all. She had taken a liking to Aang in particular and a shine to Katara in light of the help she'd given. Every now and again when she was looking for a little more sass, she'd converse with Toph. For the first time in a few days, Sokka was spending some alone time with Suki. The bygone hours left him feeling confident that Azula would be alright without him for a while.

"How are you holding up?" He asked they Kyoshi woman.

"Kind of ready to get home. Other than that, I'm fine. Katara and I made flower crowns the other day." Suki replied. "They didn't turn out that bad. What about you Sokka, is she being good to you?"

It took him a moment to place who she was referring to. "Azula, yeah. She's nicer than she'd like any of us to know." He peered over at the woman in question. "Actually I'm having a pretty good time right now."

"That's wonderful." Suki added cheerfully. "I guess that this jungle is a lot nicer when nothing is at stake."

"You're telling me." Sokka put his hands behind his head. His leisurely stroll came to an abrupt end at an angry cry from Azula accompanied by a splat on his face. The offending creature landed on his chest and croaked.

Apparently forgetting about the questionable condition of her legs, Azula stomped up to Sokka and snatched the toad-squirrel back. As an apology she stated, "I told him to stay put. He's too daft to know what that means."

"You're keeping that thing?" Sokka scrunched his brows.

"Naturally." She answered as the group slowed to a halt. "I wouldn't be walking if it didn't invade my personal space."

"Clearly he has does that a lot." Sokka wiped the toad slime from his forehead.

"Have you named it yet?" Aang asked, leaving Azula to shake her head no.

"You should call it Sokka, it looks kinda like him." Toph declared.

"I agree, it does look like him doesn't it." Suki noted. It was the first thing she had said, that didn't send pangs of irritation through Azula's soul. "Maybe you can call him Sok."

"Sok…" Azula pondered it, tapping her chin. She shifted and tilted her head to inspect the subject of their study. The princess would have been lying if she said she wasn't overdoing the gestures some. "Perhaps that would work."

She allowed Suki to poke at the toad-squirrel, "he's so squishy…it's kind of creepy." In response the animal flicked its tongue out and snapped it back in.

"Reminds me of pentapus, they kind of feel the same." Aang formed an opinion of his own.

"I can't believe you guys are really playing with a toad-squirrel." Katara rolled her eyes.

"Oh come on, you love him too." Toph swiped the amphibian and waved it in Katara's face making sucking-smacking noises.

"His name is Muzuko." Azula proclaimed.

"Muzuko?" Sokka inquired.

"He has Zuko's eyes."

"I think that she's right." Aang snickered.

She held the toad-squirrel up and announced, "Muzuko, son of Zuko." She took a step to the left so that the sunrays filtering through the palm fronds came to fall directly on the squirrel-toad.

Aang's muffled snickers grew into all out laughs. "He's so majestic."

"A true Fire Lord." Azula agreed.

"Wow, she is in a good mood today." Katara noted.

"Yeah, nice work Katara." Sokka replied. He found himself captivated again by the woman they were speaking of. It was one thing to see her teary-eyed and venerable side and another all together to see this light-hearted side of her. Sure, both were sides he never thought he would see of her, but that was as far as similarities went. If he was to be completely honest, he expected to see her fooling around with the gang even less than he had expected to see her cry. The toad-squirrel slipped from her palm and fell onto her eye. Sokka took note of its affinity for faces. "It's nice to see her happy." He just hoped that it would last. He enjoyed the bright look on her face, the warmth in her eyes amplified by the sun falling over her. More than that he enjoyed the silky sound of her laughter. A sound she hadn't made in so long.


	18. Just A Little

**Crapshak: No worries! I fully admit to almost never proof reading, it's like my one true flaw as a writer-I lack the attention span for it lmao. I catch a lot of typos after the fact though. I'm trying to get in the habit of actually proof reading though! Muzuko is my little comic relief buddy; there was so much angst in this fic, they all need a way to wind down. A blessing comes in the form of a frog.**

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The sky was painted a watercolor grey, accented by slivery-blue bolts of light that sent pangs of longing through Azula's soul. She studied the jagged lines as they fractured the sky, dissipating with a series of ground-rumbling bangs. Even from such a distance the storm was powerful.

"Alright everyone breaktime's over, we need to picking things up a little." Sokka rushed them to gather their belongings. His focus never wavering from the gathering storm-dark. "I'm hoping that we'll be in Hira'a before the storm gets bad."

Katara nodded in agreement, "if we work fast enough, I think that we'll be able to make it." The expression she wore lacked the confidence in her voice conveyed, her closeness to Aang only solidified this.

"I hear that storms here get pretty wild." Suki bit her lip. With this, Toph began shoving her things into her pack haphazardly. The Kyoshi warrior stooped down to help her shove the rest of her stuff in.

The only person who didn't seem bothered was Azula. The woman held her pack to her chest, observing the sky as she waited for everyone else to depart. The wind stirred her hair, it was already picking up some. By the time Sokka informed her that they were on their way, several fat raindrops had already splattered across her arms. She slipped Muzuko into her pocket and trailed alongside Sokka. The group as a whole agreed, without vocalization, that discussion wasn't needed—each person falling into their own silent focus. The group was as oblivious to her thoughts as Azula was to theirs. The princess herself had thoughts mostly pertaining to how thankful she was that the last few days had been generous to her; kind enough to allow her to recover in full. By the present, she had all, if not, most of her strength back and she was going to need it if the incoming storm was as intense as they all predicted. Another raindrop or two smacked her on the neck. The horizon was taking on a bruised purple shade, with it a gloom befell the jungle. Serving to punctuate the dimness, much of the jungle white noise died away. Sokka pressed in closer to her. She could smell it on the wind, the beginnings of the storm.

It was starting to drizzle. A soft mist crawled at their feet, twisting around their ankles like some yearning phantom. Azula waded through it in a wistful sort of haze, momentarily lost within a daydream of home. She saw no real danger to keep her attention so she let her mind wander. Every now and again she would be pulled from her dream by a roll of thunder. After the first few clasps of it, Azula found that she could hear nothing at all. Save for a low croak from Muzuko, the other animals seemed to have burrowed away. Without realizing it, the group seemed to huddle together. Sokka's arm constantly brushed hers as they moved forward. Various splinters of lightning illuminated the world around them. Sokka didn't miss the sense of longing in her eyes, that grew with each flash. Every single strike seemed to be a reminder of what she'd lost. Sokka brushed his finger tips over hers.

Just a little past noon, even Muzuko had grown eerily quiet. He was sensing something dismal in the air a certain danger that would come with the clouds. It was only with the toad-squirrel's unease, that Azula started to feel rather off-put. Everyone seemed to be feeding off of the negative energy the person next to them emitted. Unbeknownst to her, Azula—for a while anyhow—had been the one they looked at to alleviate some of the alarm. With her weariness added to the mix, the nervous energy went unchecked. The sky opened up and wept upon them in full fury. Muzuko took the initiative to tuck himself back into Azula's pocket. She squinted against the rain.

"We're not gonna make it back like this." Aang hollered over the wind.

"We'll find a place to wait it out." Sokka answered with just as much volume. Though not exactly invited, he came to loop his arm around Azula's.

"We should have been looking for shelter before it got like this." Katara grumbled.

"I was looking." Azula replied. "The best I saw was a large boulder, hardly a good shelter."

"Whoa!" Suki shouted, her foot had found a slick layer of sludge. The girl fell back at once and would have landed face-up in the mud had Azula not reclaimed her agile reflexes. Suki took a moment to compose herself before offering the princess a hasty thank you.

"Can't Toph make us a shelter?" Azula asked.

"I can try." Toph replied. "I don't know how sturdy it will be." She slammed her foot on the ground four times over, coaxing a slab of rock up from the ground with each blow. From the side of one of the rocks, she crafted a roof. The makeshift shelter held for a fair amount of time. The earth below them was shaking profoundly with the thunder, each tiny shift rendered Toph's stones less stable. The earthbender gave it her best to keep up with the cracks forming and the direction each slab was drifting in. Katara clung tight to Aang. It might have held had it not taken an almost direct shot of lightning. Sokka was taken aback once again by the yearning in Azula's eyes. For it, he held her tighter fearing deep down, that she would actually reach for the bolt.

"It's not going to hold." Toph confirmed. She toppled the structure herself, deciding that the more control they had, the better.

As the rainfall grew thicker, the fog grew denser. Sighting an adequate place to ride the storm out became that much more difficult. The rain was pelting the group with such ferocity Azula had to wonder if their were balls of hail in the mix. She found herself drenched and miserable, she stole a quick peek into her pocket and established that Mazuko was just as despondent as she. "You see a place for us to stay?" Sokka asked.

"Why do I always have to do everything!?" She snapped.

Sokka flinched and hurried to come up with a good thing to cool her sudden outburst. "Because you're the smartest and most observant of us."

"I'm not in the mood for your ass kissing right now, Sokka."

He lifted his arms. "Alright, sorry." For a moment she thought that he would sulk off and leave her to her lonesome—the notion had definitely crossed his mind. But the look on her face urged him to stay. She wouldn't fess up, and she wouldn't apologize but he sensed that she hadn't intended on going off on him. "This is an aggravating situation."

"Yes." Azula agreed. She was apparently in the mood for company, but not for words. He was pleased to realize that he was starting to catch onto her moods.

"Hey!" Suki called. "I think that's a cave."

"Oh, please let it be a cave." Katara replied.

With a renewed sense of energy, the group hastened their pace. They came to a place where the ground opened up. "Now all we need is a fire." Aang declared, sapping even more joy out of Azula. He took it upon himself to fill in for her. She apprehended that her karma for chiding Sokka was instantaneous. Once more, she felt utterly useless—she couldn't save their makeshift shelter, she couldn't find them one to take its place, and she couldn't even provide one with light. They filed in one by one leaving her as the only one refusing to enter the tunnel. "What are you waiting for?" Sokka asked, "it's awful out there."

"I'm not going in there." Azula vowed, from her tone he knew that, that was the end of it. "I've had it with caves and tunnels and rocks. I'll take my chance with the storm." As if to reiterate, she seated herself. She took Muzuko from her pocket. "Don't lose him."

"Azula."

She thrusted the toad-squirrel at him, "don't lose him." She repeated.

"Is there anything I can do to get you to come into this cave?" He asked.

"No."

He took the critter from her hand and sat at the mouth of the cave until Katara beckoned him to come deeper within. He supposed he should look around. The cave itself was certainly less of a cave and more like a burrow of sorts. There was a hole at the back of the tunnel, he suspected that was where the cave would truly begin. From a distance he watched Azula linger outside with the rain tumbling off of her in rivers. She was shivering, drenched, the very picture of forlornness. Yet she refused to budge, however reckless it was, he had to admire her perseverance. Splashes of mud from their hustle to get to the shelter dotted her face, mostly the right side. It was running with the droplets of water down to her neck. Even from where he stood, he could see her trembling.

Suki wandered towards the mouth of the tunnel. "It's really warm in here." She noted. "Aang has a fire going, we're gonna roast some leechy nuts."

Azula took the statements passively.

"Sokka's worried." She added.

Azula crossed her arms.

"We don't want you to hurt yourself out there." Suki tried again. "You just got over a fever, do you want a cold to take its place?"

Still the princess didn't budge.

"Alright fine." Suki looked back at Sokka. He was stroking the toad-squirrel with the demeanor of a kicked puppy. Maybe if he hadn't looked so pitiful Suki would have left the former firebender to her own self-destructive inclinations. But his concern was contagious so she found herself trooping out of the cave and dragging a vigorously protesting princess into the tunnel.

"You have a lot of nerve, handling _me_ that way." Azula spat.

"Just trying to help." Suki replied.

The group was becoming increasingly brave around her, and Azula didn't quite know how to take it. Just how much intimidation had she lost? She was sure that she hadn't shown that much vulnerability in front of them. It had to be her lack of fire, she decided. "Do you think I can't fight back?"

"I don't think you want to." Sokka replied. "If there wasn't at least one part of you that wanted to join us, I doubt Suki would have gotten you in here."

"Come sit down." Katara patted the ground next to her.

"The leechy nuts are almost done." Aang added.

The fury was subsiding. It was trust, she comprehended, they were comfortable with her. She drew close to the fire, feeling at once that the vibe of this cave was rather cozy. She still didn't know how to handle the conclusion she had just come to. She was still shivering when she finally sat down. Aang dropped a couple of toasted lychee nuts into her palm.

"Here." Sokka presented.

"What's this?" Azula asked.

"You haven't worn it in a while."

She unfolded the cloth to find Sokka's hoodie. It was as damp as everything else but the extra layer of cloth would do her some good so she pulled it over her head. In the form of a toad-squirrel in her hair, the princess received a surprise when she flicked the hood up. She didn't bother to move Muzuko, she was probably warm up there.

It became increasingly obvious that they would not be in Hira'a by days end. There was no point in complaining so Toph figured it would be a prime time for another round of spooky stories. Azula groaned inwardly, swearing to kick the ass of anyone who made her think of Hogoseki. By the end of it she had to admit that she was having a good time. A time that became even better when the flames were fading into little more than a soft glow. A time at which the others had grown quiet and Sokka tossed his blanket over his body and Azula's. The tunnel floor wasn't the picture of luxury nor comfort, but Sokka made it so. Her back was to the Water Tribesman but she could feel him toying with her hair and sometime later felt a kiss on the back of her neck. The sound of the passing storm eased the turmoil in her mind—the very turmoil that it had created in the first place.

Just when she thought that she was the only one left awake, Suki spoke up. "You know I'm glad you came in here with us. Believe it or not, I was worried about you too."

"You were?"

Suki laughed, "just a little."


	19. Philophobia

**Crapshak: I need to give them some progress. I didn't want Suki to come off as a bitch or something. I don't particularly care for it when authors (pro authors included) demonize one character to uplift a ship. Plus I feel like the two would have some common ground. She's gonna need some time to completely overcome everything. And thanks lol, this is the fastest I've been able to update a fic in a while. Back in the day I was able to get a chapter done a day, I had so much free time! I miss that lol.**

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Azula peered over the rails, watching the water roll by. The growing distance between she and the Forgetful Valley offered her such a great sense of peace. But the further she drifted from it, the closer she was to the Capital which brought its own sense of discomfort. It would be odd, she realized, to be back within the palace walls. Her nervous anticipation was accented with thrill. Deep down, there was another sorrow; the odds of reawakening her bending grew slimmer with every mile. _To return to the Fire Nation without any fire…_ she closed her eyes and inhaled the salty air, trying to sort out her jumble of feelings.

"You ready to go home?" Sokka asked.

It took a moment but she replied, "yes, I've been waiting a long time." She gazed in the direction of her former home.

"You'll certainly have a story to tell."

"And there are certain parts that won't be shared." She fixed him a sharp gaze. "I do believe you know which parts will be left out."

"Any time you showed human emotion?" Sokka smirked. "That leaves a lot of holes."

"You're hilarious Sokka." She rolled her eyes. "The picture of humor."

He slipped his arms under hers and clutched the rail. The volcano which nestled Capital City rose mighty against the afternoon sun. With the sky as magnificently blue as it was, they would arrive in no time. He could already smell the smoke and sulfur. By the time they reached the harbor the noon had turned to dusk. A truly Fire Nation dusk, in the brightest golds and most potent oranges. Azula watched a flock of toucan-puffin drift by until they came to close to the sun for her to stare any longer. The boat came to a stop and as quick as a few tossed anchors and the unfurling of a ramp, a princess set foot on the soil of her kingdom.

The sights and sounds to follow were foreignly familiar. The meat vendors brought the smell of roast hippo-cow—Sokka was quick to snatch a slice or two. "I haven't had real food in ages!" He proclaimed. Katara ran her hand over various silks and declared that they ought to get some new clothes since theirs were at their use's end. Azula herself was urging them on as quickly as possible, truth be told, she was growing antsy. Katara won that round—not that Azula particularly minded after she found herself in clothing that lacked holes and tatters and smelled rather heavenly. She supposed that it was only fitting that she presented herself with all the grace and elegance she had been known for during her prime. As the others dressed themselves, Azula took the time to style her hair. She'd found that it had grown considerably in the past few weeks. She fashioned as much of it as she could into a small topknot and came to join the rest of the group. With her hair and dress fixed, she felt much closer to her old self.

 **.oOo.**

"I was wondering when you all would get back." Zuko greeted. "I was beginning to think you lost Aang."

"It's been stressful." Katara replied. "You have no idea how close we were to losing him. We probably would have if…" she trailed off.

Azula supposed that was her cue to step forward. She took it with her head held high. "If I didn't help." She finished.

"You saved Aang?" Zuko asked.

"You're welcome, Zu-Zu."

"Who tortured you into doing that?" He laughed. Satisfied with his own joke, he didn't wait for the answer she wasn't ready to give him. Instead he beckoned them in and requested that they tell him everything.

As Azula pondered over exactly how to begin the tale, Sokka took it upon himself to share the whole thing in perfect detail. She had to admit that she was impressed by his apt storytelling abilities—the Water Tribesman didn't miss a thing, not even the most grisly details. Not even the mortifying ones. All at once she realized that he never did promise that he wouldn't overshare. All she could do was take particularly timed sips of tea as he announced that she had cried and fretted on numerous occasions. Azula made a point of looking away as the man relayed the night he awoke to her crying to herself. That was how she learned that the rest of the group didn't know of that either. She folded her arms over her chest and glared at the man as he continued. She very nearly excused herself when he began to vividly describe her rather wretched state after having the hoodie torn from her grasp. He only toned it down after receiving a sturdy kick under the table. By then she supposed it didn't really matter, that was the most humiliating moment she'd endured. It still brought color to her cheeks. By the time he'd finished with his tale, Azula felt quite naked. Sokka had the look of a triumphant artist in his eyes, the twinkle quickly died out when it occurred to him that these were the details she'd told him to stay away from. And she would leave him to that. With a forced cough she excused herself from the conversation. Her pride had taken enough hits without the smug smile Mai extended to her, she needed to retain some of it. If she had stayed a moment more, she may have seen the warm, welcoming expression from her mother.

"I'm sorry, those weren't my secrets to tell. I just got a little—very carried away." Sokka rubbed the back of his head.

"Carried away." Azula muttered, not once turning to face him. Instead she put an obscene amount of focus on dabbing her lipstick on just right. "This is why I was supposed to tell the story."

"So you could be in control again?" He asked.

"So I could choose what was shared." She replied.

"In other words." He paused, "so you could be in control again."

"If you say so." She waved him off and picked up her foundation. "I would have told it better anyhow. After all it was _my_ story." She could see right away that she had successfully railed him up.

"It was Aang's story too! And you wouldn't have been a part of it if I didn't let you." He snapped.

"Let me?" She asked. "I do what I want." She dabbed the foundation on harder. "I didn't need your permission."

"Why are you acting like this? What, you get home and suddenly you remember that you're above the rest of us?" A look of knowing passed over his face, "I get it, Hogoseki can't get you here so you can go back t-to…" he stammered. "To being heartless."

Azula turned to face him with the kind of scowl he hadn't expected to see her wear ever again. "Yes Sokka, _you're_ right." She hissed, everything in her eyes, tone, and stature conveyed that he was wrong. But she continued anyways. "I'm home, I have what I want. You have Aang, so why don't you get back to your friends and I'll get back to how things were supposed to be." She turned back to her mirror and picked up a stick of eyeliner.

Once again, she had him feeling foolish. "You used me." He whispered. "You drove me away from Suki and used me. And I let you do it." He gave a bitter laugh. "I gotta say that's pretty impressive. If you can deceive a spirit that powerful, you can lie to anyone." In the background of the mirror she could see him heading for the door.

In the foreground, the face in the mirror was familiar. Horribly familiar. It went beyond the perfectly winged lashes and the flatteringly accented lips. It went beyond caking the scar on her cheek so heavily in foundation that it may as well not exist at all. It was the vicious gleam in her eyes. It didn't set in right away, but he was right. Something about home seemed to bring her ego back and at a dangerous intensity.

"Sokka, wait." She called. He paused in the doorframe. She continued more softly, "don't leave me."

Sokka made a display of slamming the door as he stalked away. He wouldn't even offer her a final sarcastic quip. However cruel he had been, Hogoseki was correct in one thing; her pride would be her downfall.

Suddenly she wanted to be in the jungle again. At this time they would be winding down for the night, Sokka would be spreading his sleeping bag out and she hers. Though there was no point because they always ended up in one sleeping bag within a few hours. Her own bed, however plush it was seemed terribly lonely. It had always been roomy, but it never felt that way until she splayed herself down upon it.

Azula didn't emerge from her room for some time. It wasn't until well after dark that she found the energy to creep down the hall. This portion of it was unlit and she hadn't her own fire to guide her. As if to rub in her face just how much time had passed, she found herself slamming her toes or her hip against various pieces of furniture she had forgotten the placement of. Each time she uttered one hushed curse or another to herself.

Azula decided that she could go for a quick drink of water—of a good swig of cactus juice—so she slipped into the dining room. Only a few hours ago, Sokka had been sitting at that table boasting of how happy he was to have her; she supposed that had slipped her mind when scolding him for the other details. She took a seat.

"Your up late." Noted one of the serving girls—either Mihan or Roya, it had been so long since she'd called for either.

"Just getting used to being home." It wasn't a lie exactly, but it wasn't the root of the problem either.

"Can I get you anything?"

"Not right now." Azula replied. Instead of the drink she had come for, the princess found herself staring at the wall. She _did_ wish for things to get back to normal, maybe all it took was ripping off the band-aid for it to happen. It was a quick fling—something to get her through that jungle looking hell—nothing more.

If she could deceive a sprit that powerful, then she could surely deceive herself.

Azula must have fallen asleep at that table, for it was daytime when she woke up. Sides were very clear, she expected nothing less. Katara was back to resenting her for slighting Sokka so. And Suki, she was unquestionably infuriated that her breakup with the man was for nothing. Azula had a feeling that she'd have him back soon enough though.

For this, Azula wanted to regret helping the Avatar, but it had gotten her home so it was just as well.

"So you'll be heading back to the Water Tribe then?" Zuko asked.

"Not quite yet." Sokka replied. "I need a little break before traveling again."

"We all do." Toph agreed. "I'm already tired of boats."

Azula on the other hand was very ready for them to be gone. The further she was from Sokka the sooner she could put this shameful experience behind her. With time, hopefully she could pretend that it was all some kind of dream born of her psychosis. She would certainly pretend that, that was the case.

That didn't help her sleep at night, not when her mind tossed her back into that despicable cave. Not when those vile stony fingers were cutting into her chin. Not when she'd awake feeling breathless and teary eyed.

Not when she'd wake up alone.

"You aren't well." Her mother remarked near the week's end.

"I'm perfectly fine." Azula replied.

"It's the Water Tribe boy isn't it? It sounds like you two helped each other out." She smiled. "I was delighted to hear it, he seems like a good match for you."

"It doesn't matter." Azula dismissed the comment. "He's well on his way to the south…or north, wherever he's from."

"Not yet, the boat won't be leaving for a while, if you want to say goodbye to your new friends."

"They aren't friends." Azula muttered _. Just something to get me through the jungle_ , she reiterated inwardly.

Ursa furrowed her brows. "He said that you loved him."

"That was a lapse of judgement, clearly."

"Are you sure that this isn't the lapse of judgment?" Ursa questioned.

Azula groaned to herself. All this time she thought that she had gotten her cunning way with words from her father.

 **.oOo.**

Sokka stretched his arms. He would not be missing having to haul his pack around everywhere. Soon he would be back in the south pole where he belonged with a big bowl of sea prune stew. He had his sister and he had Aang. Ideally he'd get a chance to drop by Toph. That was all he needed. Suki would have been nice, but she was dead set in a bold 'I told you so' mood. Frankly, he didn't have it in him to put up with that. No, it would just be Sokka and the single life. The single life didn't have him in tears because his girlfriend turned into the moon… or into an insufferable bitch. He rather expected such from Azula, but Suki? He was certain that Suki would be sweet to the end.

"You almost ready, Katara?"

"Just about." She answered. "Aang is all ready to go."

Katara ran through her belongings one last time before leading them out of the inn and towards the harbor. "Home sweet home." He whispered to himself upon coming into the shadow of the vessel. He scanned the tiny crowd—mostly friends and guard personal—as he walked the length of the dock. Suki opted out of making an appearance—which was probably for the best he decided. Toph was there waving…in the wrong direction, but it was a good effort. An effort Sokka liked a great deal more than he would have enjoyed a successful wave. Azula was there too, she stood stiff and quiet. Her expression was hauntingly blank, reminding him all too much of the night before he had to chase her through the jungle. Zuko stepped out of the crowd to show him off. "It was good seeing you again Zuko." He gave the man a hug.

"I'm sure you'll be back." Zuko returned the gesture. "Take care, and if you do come back, please come back with good news this time."

"I'll try my best." Sokka laughed. As he did so, he stole a look over Zuko's shoulder. She was still staring at him. In which manner the look was meant, he couldn't decipher. He had his speculations though. He had a strong feeling that she would go to him. So he broke his embrace with Zuko and took a step towards her.

 **.oOo.**

Azula felt hollow. Hollow and numb. She gathered that she'd rather feel numb than anything else. Numb was as close to feeling nothing as she would get. She almost went to him but couldn't bring herself to do so. For once it had little to do with pride—she was simply drained. She'd spent all of her energy and then some in the Forgetful Valley and had nothing else to propel her forward. Her motivation had fallen alarmingly low, the only reason she found herself out and about was to get her mother to stop looking at her like she was some delicate thing.

She watched Zuko receive his hug; just another thing that ought to have been hers.

Her expression dimmed more, if that was even possible. She felt the tension leave her body, a deeper sense of detachment setting in. She considered for not the first time, that she was being melodramatic about the whole thing. So she allowed herself to retreat into this newfound detached state. Azula permitted herself to withdraw so far into it, that she didn't even notice the arms wrapped around her. She didn't hear him wave Katara and Aang off, nor did she hear him tell them that he'd head home later.

"I'm sorry." She whispered, it was the first time she bothered to say it and she couldn't get much passed it. With only the two words out of her mouth, the weight and stress of everything that had happened in the past few weeks crashed down around her. He replied something that might have been, "it's okay." She was far past paying attention and well into burying her face in his shirt.

Azula wished she could have waited until she was home but it was too late for that. She gripped his shirt in her fists and wept again. All of the tears she ought to have cried in the Forgetful Valley. He held her with just as much tightness as she was gripping his shirt. Clearly, he didn't have to tell them about her sobbing, she was painting a pretty accurate picture of it herself.

"Let's get you inside." He mumbled into her hair.

The princess was still rather dazed as he led her to the royal palanquin and held that dull stupor for most of the ride. A ride in which she spent curled up on the floor with Sokka stroking either her hair or her back. She could gather from his expression that he didn't quite know what to do. But at least he was doing something.

Sokka helped her walk into the palace, where she saw her mother abruptly stand. Zuko spoke, telling Ursa something akin to giving her some space. She wasn't very focused on that conversation either. She was still thinking everything over. The curse, the burning feeling, her lost bending, that nasty face of rock and its purple glow, the storm, the fights, the companionship she almost found in the rest of the gang…all at once. All too fast.

 **.oOo.**

Azula's tears didn't start to slow until Sokka had her tucked into bed where she nuzzled her face into the softest pillow on the bed. Soon, with him squeezing her hand, her cries faded into soft whimpers. And the shaking of her shoulders ceased. At last she lie mostly silent, officially drained completely.

He watched her wakefulness decline. Just like that, she was asleep. He called for the servants to have a hot meal ready for her when she woke. It would be some time before then and he was left feeling guilty again. Deep down he knew that he had only been a part of it—granted he was the final straw—but he felt as though this had been a long time coming.

When Azula finally came out of her nap she looked up from her pillow. Tousled hair, running makeup, and tearstained cheeks; she was the absolute picture of misery. "Why didn't you go home?" Her voice was small and—from the strain of crying—hoarse. "You should have gone home."

"Why is that?" He asked.

"It would have been easier for you."

"That's not true."

"You're angry with me…"

"That's also not true." He replied. "Not anymore."

Azula watched him carefully with those downcast gold eyes.

"You want to talk about it."

This time she answered affirmatively before opening the floodgates. She told him of her nightmares, of just how null she felt without her fire, and more than anything her aversion…her _fear_ of falling in love. She sat up, "I don't want to be alone."

"You won't be." Sokka replied. "You can come back to the south the next time I go to visit."

She leaned into her arms. "Maybe, I don't like the cold?"

"Have you ever been in the cold?"

Azula thought for a moment. "I have not."

"Then how do you know you won't like it?" He asked.

"The same way I know Zuko is an idiot. You just look and you know…" she trailed off.

"You're still upset, aren't you?"

Her reluctance to reply was answer enough. She drew her legs up to her chest. "I still don't know why you came back. I can't love you like Suki did. I don't know if I can do it at all."

"If I wanted someone to love me like Suki did, I would be with Suki. And that's just not true, you have…you have your own way of expressing things." Sokka took her hands. "It's different but I'm starting to catch on."

She considered his words. "I don't know that you are correct."

He leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers. As she returned his affections, with his thumbs, he brushed the remaining tears from her cheeks. She pulled away for a moment, as though the first was a tester, she tasted his lips with a bit more force. She pushed him closer until her chest was pressed against his. Still nibbling on his lip, she glided her hand under his shirt, running her fingers over his bear chest. This was where her touch lingered, she didn't seem to know where to go from there.

In general, the princess didn't seem to know very well, what she was doing, but he would work with her, just as he had in the Forgetful Valley.

He mimicked her motion, gliding his hand under her shirt and over her back. In a second maneuver, he pulled the shirt over her head and cast it aside, leaving her to assume she should do the same. As he had hoped she picked up on the cues very quickly. Speedy enough to have the rest of their clothes in a heap on the floor. Sokka admitted to himself that he would have liked the initial undressing to have been taken a little slower but then again he always knew the woman to be very straight forward. He tugged at the ribbon in her hair, until the rest of it fell loose.

It came as a hint of a surprised when she tugged him down first. With his hands on her hips he trailed long and lingering kisses from her lips to her belly button and then a little lower still. Her hold on his back tightened some. He took a moment to brush her hair out of her face and kiss her once more. That time she took the initiative to deepen the kiss herself, pulling away only when she was at her breath's end. Panting softly and a bit red in the face, she set his hand upon her breast and suckled his neck. For a moment he feared that she would actually bite him as she did with his lip. But it would seem that she wasn't ready to go there. So he slid his hands down her hips and connected with her, eliciting a soft sigh of pleasure.

For the little experience she had, she proved to be just as graceful with the body as she was with her fire. Quick and precise, electrifying and, at times, on the aggressive side. She certainly put in the same passion that she put into her bending. He had a feeling he'd come out with a few scratches by sunrise. For all of her dominance though, she seemed content on the bottom, letting him run things for a change. After sometime he got her to clutch the bed sheets as opposed to digging into his back. All in all, she did rather well. His touch still lingered about her and he could still taste her on his lips as they lie under the bedsheets. She didn't offer him many words, perhaps she was still lost—staring at the ceiling—in a pleasured buzz. A euphoric haze that she'd never felt before then. After some time she sat back up, but only for a moment to give his chest one final kiss before laying back down. She rested her hands upon his chest and nestled her head against her hands. Her hair tickled his sides but he didn't move it. Instead he put his own hand on her lower back and listened to her breaths as she dozed off.

Azula was still asleep when he awoke. Gazing upon that sleeping face, he knew that he couldn't leave her. He studied her face some a serene smile softened features that were already so. Her eyes displayed not tension. Her lips were parted some. It was nice to see such peace on a face that had seen so much pain. Her lashes fluttered, an indication that she would finally be joining him out of sleep. She sat up, rubbed her eyes, and stretched. She greeted him with a yawn and a good morning. He beamed back at her, knowing then that, that is what he wanted to wake up to each morning.


	20. With A Heart In Your Mouth

**Crapshak: Indeed it was, I just hope it wasn't to abrupt of a roller coaster if that makes sense. I tried to pace it smoothly and realistically. And thanks, I've been waiting a while to make that joke lol.**

* * *

Azula blinked the remaining visages of sleep from her eyes. Sokka was still deep in slumber, the man had a habit of sleeping in. Not that she blamed him, the frigid air was plenty of reason on its own to stay beneath layers of sheets, furs, and blankets. It had taken much effort for her to get used to the frost of the Southern Water Tribe. All of that time, and she still wasn't quite acquainted with it. She forced herself to stand, put her hands on her back, and stretched. She supposed that she was as ready as she would be to start the morning. Azula pulled a coat on, no doubt she'd be hearing it from Sokka again, how she wore more layers of clothing than anyone who had ever visited the Water Tribe. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. This woman had a sort of gentleness in her golden eyes, a glow that wasn't there before. In general her features seemed somehow softer in the company of such a tender expression. Perhaps this was due in part to a lesser use of makeup—things were simpler in the Water Tribe, in that regard. The makeup she did use was limited to a soft sweep of eyeliner and a lighter shade of lipstick. Complimenting the lack of makeup, a thin scar running, uncovered, along her cheek. A scar she hadn't thought too much of in years. Her thoughts of that endeavor had mostly faded into the background coming up only once in a while, in the shape of a dream, during times of stress. She trailed her pointer along the length of the scar. To some degree, Azula didn't quite recognize herself, especially now that she found herself adorned in Water Tribe garb. Her hair was longer still with strands pulled through beads of many colors and shapes.

She wandered outside where she was met with another flurry. The snowflakes never seemed to stop falling around these parts. They clung to her lashes for seconds before melting away once more. Adjusting to life so far from home, and so outstandingly different had been a task. Learning to walk on the snow and ice was unexpectedly tedious, there had been a few times when she had placed her foot in the wrong spot and landed face first in the snow. On those nights she'd go home shivering and accompanied by a bought of childish laughter from Sokka, who had apparently been getting a kick out of watching her make friends with the ground. The food, to her dismay, was all of the sea variety. Naturally had to overcome her aversion to its taste. Before long though, she as adapt as anyone else in the villager—if not, very close to it. Even still it had taken the village some time to get used to the presence of a firebender within their walls. Azula was a rather curious thing for them, coupled with being a woman of high birth, she found herself being the subject of many stares. Gradually the number of eyes on her dropped until she was just another woman going about her life; fishing with Sokka, gazing at the curtain of light in the sky when it was present, and on certain nights joining a traditional dance or two. All in all she had grown fond of the place. She had to admit that it was rather laughable, that just as she was getting used to being there, she, Sokka, and Katara would be going back to the Fire Nation. Though she was eager to hear how well Zuko had been taking care of Muzuko in her absence. The child in her hoped that the toad-squirrel was giving him a hard time.

Deciding that it would be best to start packing, Azula ended her reminisce and re-entered the house. Upon doing so, she was greeted with an odor of seafood and a type of spice that had to have been imported from the Fire Nation. The smell of seafood, as it turned out still made her nauseous—oddly enough more than before.

Sokka didn't miss the appalled look scrunching her face, "Don't you just love the smell of seaweed and squid?" He held his bowl of seaweed stew right under her nose.

Her lip curled back in disgust, "get that away from me before I throw up." She pushed the bowl back towards him.

"Good morning, to you too." He laughed.

"Yes, that was quite a greeting." She muttered.

"How's the weather?"

"Roasting, absolutely scorching, Sokka." She rolled her eyes. "It's the same as it is every day. Cold and snowing."

"Yes, but is it a flurry or a sleet, or a blizzard?"

"Does it matter?" Azula asked, already knowing the answer.

"To a good tribesman, yes it does!" Sokka declared offering her a bowl of stew with a scent masked more heavily by Fire Nation spice.

"I don't know about you all, but I'm stoked!" Katara dropped her already organized suitcase at her feet. "Aang said he would meet us on the boat. And someone still owes me a trip to the royal spa and I'm ready for it." Azula had to give the waterbender props, the woman's memory was just as keen as her own.

"Yes, I'm quite read for that myself." Azula agreed as she forced herself to eat the last of her breakfast, it wasn't quite sitting well with her that morning. "It will be nice to be in the heat again." Truth be told she had mixed feelings on the matter—going back would surly reawaken just how much she longed to have lightning dancing on her fingertips. In the Water Tribe it was so much easier to forget…to just put it behind her. No other firebenders were around to remind her of what she no longer had. "You should start getting your things together, I wouldn't like to miss our boat."

"Don't worry, I don't pack much anyways." Though that's what he had told her, the man turned out to be very particular with his belongings. He would question exactly which pair of pants to bring and whether or not he _really_ needed that many pairs of socks.

"I can't get all of this to fit." Sokka huffed as he tried to ram another fold of clothing into the pack.

"Here, let me." Azula offered, only to be ignored by the man who was so invested in getting the job done on his own.

"Just…just give me the suitcase, Sokka." Azula grumbled, eventually resorting to snatching it from him with an impatient glare.

Sokka lifted his hands. "Alright, alright. No need to get angry." And then to Katara he mumbled, "she always gets so moody when she's nervous."

Azula, who was bent over the luggage, came to an abrupt pause and dropped the shirt she was holding. "I'm not nervous!" She snapped. "And I'm not being 'moody'." She finished folding the shirt and put it away neatly.

"You weren't supposed to hear that." Sokka gave her a lopsided grin.

"I've heard a lot of things that I wasn't supposed to." She shrugged. "Anyways, if you want it all to fit you can't just toss it in, you have to actually fold it up."

"Noted." Sokka replied.

"I can't believe we have to teach you this." Katara rolled her eyes. "You're what, thirty now?"

"Twenty-Nine!" He corrected as if it made things any better. He hunched over to give his suitcase one final run through.

"Sokka!" Azula huffed. "You already checked your suitcase thrice over. What's in there that's important enough to check it so much."

"Oh you know, my favorite pair of socks, my best underpants, all of the finer things in life."

Azula groaned, "say something like that again and I'm leaving you."

He slung an arm around her neck, "and let you miss out on the true joys of our relationship, not a chance."

 **.oOo.**

Sokka dug around in his suit case again. He wrapped his fingers around a velvet blue pouch. He couldn't imagine that it would go anywhere after zipping his suitcase tight, but it still brought him relief to know for sure that it was still there. Between his fingers he fiddled with the pearl on the end of the band that held the pouch closed.

"What's that?" Katara asked.

"Very important." Sokka replied. He looked up to see Azula making conversation with Aang. With cautious hands he pulled the pouch open and dumped a necklace into his palm. He turned it over for Katara to see. It was a thing of elegant craft; smooth polished turquoise etched with intricate swirls and bas relief waves. Fixed in the center was a large sapphire and around it looped a series of deep blue onyx.

"Is that…"

Sokka nodded. "I just don't know when or how I'm going to ask her."

 **.oOo.**

The air ran hot across Azula's face, welcoming the princess back into her country. More than anything about the Fire Nation, she missed the way the sun scorched and kissed her skin. The bliss of it, displayed itself quite plainly on her face.

"Oh thank Agni you're back, this thing is driving me nuts." Zuko greeted, thrusting the toad-squirrel cage into her arms.

"He's doing very well then." Azula stroked the head of her old companion.

"Welcome home."

"Thank you, Zu-Zu. Be a dear and tell one of the servants to carry my things."

"First, tell me what you thought of the Water Tribe." Zuko requested.

"Once you get past the cold, it's a very charming place. Have you ever seen lights dancing in the sky?" She rather enjoyed the phenomenon—it had become one of her favorite things about the south. "The penguins are pretty lovely too, sometimes they sneak into the house."

"Well that's something I haven't gotten a chance to experience." Zuko laughed.

"You should try it some time. They kind of just tower of you until you wake up and notice that they're there." She put her hands on her hips. "How have things been in the Fire Nation?"

"The usual. Mother has me watching Kiyi in between council meetings. I got a…strongly worded letter from the prison."

Azula chuckled, "did father have anything worthwhile to say?"

"Just that I'm letting the Fire Nation go to shit and that aardvark-sloth could do a better job than me. He said that uncle is a uh…never mind. He called our mother worthless as well and he didn't mention you, which is probably a good thing."

"Wonderful to hear." Azula replied. "At least we have one constant to rely on when everything else is changing." She fell back to talk to Katara and give Sokka some time to chat with her brother. Sokka had a few things that he was bursting to tell Zuko, including things about his increased hunting abilities, this new sword he had crafted for himself, and some other news that apparently wasn't for her to know. "So what kind of petals would you like in your bath?"

"I'm fine with any as long as it comes with a facial mask." Katara grinned.

"I enjoy rose and pandalily myself."

"I don't know, I'm more of a lavender kind of guy." Aang put in. For all of her people skills, she couldn't tell if he was joking or if he really wanted to join them.

So she replied, "I'll make sure you get them."

 **.oOo.**

From what Sokka gathered, the spa was not quite enough luxury for Azula for one day. He found her that night sitting on the stony ledge of the hot spring, absently kicking her feet at the water below when he approached her. The steam furled and licked her bare skin, rising up aplenty to meet the full moon above. The warm night was made humid by the churning water below. He watched her slip into the spring water. Once chest deep in the water, she closed her eyes and let a relaxed sigh escape her lips. He could tell that she had missed the Fire Nation's abundant selection of springs. In general, she seemed happy to be home, her fiery mood, efficiently smothered. She tossed a look over her shoulder and patted the water next to her, "join me."

Sokka striped down and eased himself into the water. He on the other hand, missed the cold air and had to take getting into smoldering water in strides; first getting his ankles used to the temperature, and then his calves, and then his thighs, and so on. She extended her slender arm out to him. He took hold of her hand and she tugged him towards her, letting the water do most of the work.

"It's a nice night." She commented. "Lots of stars."

"I just wish it wasn't so hot."

"Is that right? It wouldn't be a Fire Nation summer if it wasn't suffocating hot." She replied. He had a feeling that she'd have it no other way. She trailed her pointer in circles over his chiseled chest. Her demeanor was lax, emitting an aura of leisure. He allowed his hands to glide from her shoulder blades down to her lower back and then some lower. She dipped her head and kissed his neck. "One day we should go to Ember Island together. You'll find out what it really means to endure Fire Nation heat. If I had my firebending, I'd be able to show you right now."

"You're still on about that?" He dared to ask.

"You're a nonbender, you couldn't possibly know what it is to have something all your life and then feel it ripped from you." For a moment he thought he'd effectively pissed her off. But the tempered expression passed in fleeting, giving way to something more somber. "It's not something you get used to, it's something you forget about until it comes up again."

"You're right, I don't." He agreed softly. With that he was holding her listening to the bubbling and hissing of the spring water. She looked up and followed her stare until he was staring at a sea of space dust and a kaleidoscope of stars. The reflection of them in Azula's eyes magnified their birth-blessed radiance. She swam out to the center of the spring where the moonrays fell directly over her. The glow the moon put on her skin and the shine it put in her hair seemed so natural—she'd been in the Water Tribe for so long it looked right on her. If it weren't for the vivid color and slanted shape of her eyes, Sokka realized that the princess could easily pass as a tribeswoman.

Gradually, she submerged herself completely. When she came back up she remarked. "I lost something very important in the Forgetful Valley."

Sokka stepped out of the pool, rummaging through his heap of temporarily discarded clothing. "I like to think that you found something more important to you." He responded, upon reentering the spring water.

Azula hummed lightly, "maybe so."

He drifted behind her and fastened the betrothal piece around her neck and slipped his arms under hers in a loose embrace. "I'll let you decide if you want to keep what you've found."

Azula rubbed the back of his hand with her thumb. "I always keep what I catch." She smirked.

It was the answer he was hoping for, delivered in such a fashion that only Azula could have successfully managed. Azula slipped out of his hold and let herself float lazily on her back. For a good while he simply watched her glide. He couldn't place for how long they remained like so. But in due time he was at her side with on hand touching the scar on her cheek and the other held at her back. The stars reflected enchantingly in the delicately thrashing water.

 **.oOo.**

 _The scar opened up._

 _At first it was a pinching pain._

 _And then it was piercing._

 _And then she was on the floor with a steady stream of blood welling down her cheek and along her neck. The gash grew longer and wider still as she lie on the floor trying to hold it closed. If Azula held on long enough the skin would fuse back together. But the wound just kept splitting open. She wanted nothing more than a moment of peace. As she lay, there came a sudden awareness that there was no purple glow to be seen. On weak arms, she dragged herself to the pool's edge and peered in. The heart was missing. Yet she could still see perfectly in the dark. She could see her blood drop into water, breaking the solid surface. A few droplets unfurling in smoky clouds turned into many droplets. And then a rain of them until her blood outweighed the water itself._

 _She felt it, then. The heart—first in her throat and then in her stomach. Pounding out of sync with the heart in her chest. Had she swallowed the heart? Her own lurched. She put a hand on her belly. It was there, she had definitely consumed the heart, though she had no knowledge of ever doing so._

 _In a flicker of images too fast to actually catch, she was in the other cave, on her back, the stingray beneath her and Sokka to the side of her. He gazed reassuringly into her eyes and she into his. The stingray drifted away and she could see an infinite tunnel lined with crystal clusters._

 _She still couldn't find hers._

 _And in the same merciful that brought her there, she was back on the cave floor in perfect darkness feeling colder than ever. This time she had no clothing, in its place was a horrible sense that she was being watched. Acting without permission of her own, her mouth twisted into a smile. A jagged purple smile. She was paralyzed. Paralyzed and alone with his grin on her face and a distinct beating in her tummy to go with the rapid pounding of her chest. The cave was in her and she could get it out._

She woke with her hand on placed exactly as it were in the dream. In waking, she could still feel the phantom sensation of the heart pounding beneath her fingers. For a moment she couldn't breathe. For that moment, she feared that the cave was still in her. She rolled over and pressed herself up against Sokka, a new desire seeping into her soul. A certain and sudden sense of purpose.

 **.oOo.**

Azula seemed to be deep in thought when he sat up for himself. She was as close to him as she could possibly get, but her eyes were so far away. His concern was short lived, for the minute she noticed that he was awake, she came back to the present and sat up.

Without getting up himself, he asked, "what's wrong?"

Azula sat with her hands clasped together on her lap, seeming to stare off for some time. "I have to go back there." She said at last. "To the Forgetful Valley. To the cave."

"Why would you want to do that?" He asked.

"Resolve, I suppose." She replied, sounding very much like she had something to add. He sat quietly and waited for her to elaborate. "You asked me where I'd like to get married. I've considered many places; mother thinks I should take the traditional route and marry in the ceremonial temple. This family hasn't been very traditional at all lately, so why should I?" She languidly inspected her nails. "I'd like to hold the ceremony near or under the mangrove tree."

"Do you really think that, that's a good idea?" He questioned.

She drummed perfectly filed and manicured nails upon her chin, processing the inquiry. There was a sense of finality when she simply repeated, "Good idea or not, I need to go back there."


	21. A Touch Of Pollen

**Guest: Thanks! I hope I don't disappoint. :)**

 **Crapshak: And thank you again. ^_^**

* * *

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Sokka asked again when they found themselves in the shadow of the boat a few days after.

"Have I ever been the type of person to flee a battle?" Azula asked.

"This isn't a battle—" He started only to be cut off by the princess.

"It is a battle. Between me and the cave spirit." She paused, "at the very least it's a battle against the nightmares that won't let me truly leave that cave."

"Are we bringing the whole crew?" Sokka asked, "I would feel safer if we did."

"All of them and Zuko, he's been dying to meet the spirit who made me cry. He's a big fan." Azula replied.

"It'll be interesting to see Suki again." Sokka noted. Toph was the first to arrive, she took her time though, opting to chat it up with Iroh before actually boarding the ship. This left Katara and Aang to ascend the ramp first. Suki was the last to trail up, she brought TyLee along with her, leaving Azula to admit that she wasn't prepared for that particular reunion. Of course the girl flung herself into Azula's arms.

"You can't hold a grudge like Mai can." Azula assessed as TyLee rubbed her head against her neck.

"I can't hold a grudge at all." She confessed. "How have you been!? I've heard that you've been through a lot?"

"You've heard correct." Azula replied. She spent a good duration elaborating. At times Sokka would offer his perspective on the tale. "I suppose it was worth the struggle, knowing what I have now." She finished.

"Hmm." TyLee rubbed her chin "You and Sokka. He doesn't seem like your type."

"I still talk to you, don't I?" Azula asked.

"You do!" She exclaimed, a look of knowing lighting her face. She hummed to her self again before saying, "you two are kinda cute."

"Well now that I have your permission…" Hit with a sudden wave of dizziness, Azula trailed off. "I'm going to take a seat, feel free to join me." She found herself a chair. Gazing at the passing waves, she wondered of she was more anxious than she anticipated.

"You alright?" TyLee asked.

"I will be. Just give me a moment."

Sokka filled the chair next to her and Suki, the one next to his. "So what's our plan?" He inquired.

"Well it would be a good start to find the mangrove, after we do that it should be easy; while we go find the heart pool again, the jungle will be prepped for our wedding ceremony." She drummed her fingers on the table. "Ideally, it will be ready for us when we get back." She added. "It will take us a few day s to get to the cave, I can't imagine that things won't be in order by then."

"I can't say that I'm eager to go back there." Suki shuddered.

"Hogoseki seemed to like you about as much as he likes me." Azula said.

"Why do you want to go back there? He wants you dead." She asked. The princess was beginning to gather that any leftover animosity had been dwindled away by distance and time. Or maybe it was that she'd simply found a problem where one had never been.

"I need the nightmares to stop. I need my bending. At least one would be enough." Azula replied.

"Alright." Katara spoke as she closed the distance between herself and the others. "I've picked out a few things, that I think we'll need. This time I packed some food for us."

"That should move things along quicker." Azula noted. "Did you gather a change of clothes?"

"Two changes. Toph and Aang are ready too."

"And you two?" Azula asked.

"Just about." Sokka answered.

"And Zu-Zu?" She paused and added quietly to herself, "is probably not ready."

"He still has a bit of work to do." Katara confirmed, "I'll get him moving."

"Please do." Azula turned to TyLee, "are you coming along?"

TyLee toyed with her braid. "I was actually hoping to help out with the wedding, I really like planning parties. I think I have a few neat ideas already." She smiled.

"I'll leave you in charge of it, how does that sound?"

In response, TyLee snuggled the princess again. Azula almost wanted to say that the acrobat found the entire affair to be more joyous than she and Sokka did. The chipper woman always did have an affection for all things romantic. She felt rather secure in leaving her in charge.

 **.oOo.**

Being back in the Forgetful Valley and near the mangrove brought a messy tangle of feelings—some of them pleasant and others far less so. Sokka hoped that they could see more of the optimistic parts of the first trip. He couldn't imagine that it could be any worse than their first adventure, especially with Azula in an infinitely sturdier frame of mind. The former firebender seemed to be in very high spirits as of late—in general the team morale seemed optimal for another journey. The only tension he could discern was the underlying anxious anticipation that seemed to ebb off of all of them, Azula in particular. Sokka watched her give a few final instructions and wedding must-have's to TyLee before she came to stand with the rest of them, leaving the acrobat to skip off and start giving commands of her own.

"It's a beautiful day." Suki noted.

"Considering the storm we went through last time, it better stay that way." Katara muttered.

The duration of their travels proved to be every bit as uneventful as Sokka had hoped. Three days in they were met with a small sprinkle. It was a welcomed rain as the day had been nearly unbearably humid. A soft mist rolled along the ground as dusk set in. It was Suki's idea to go for a swim; they were getting wet anyhow so they might as well. They all had changes of clothes so no one had any qualms about sacrificing one pair. Before long they became immersed in friendly competition. Zuko and Azula facing Katara and Sokka, seeing who could knock who off of whose shoulders first. The winner faced Suki and Toph with Aang as a spectator. Sokka could always count on his fiancé to get much too invested in it. They found that she and Zuko made a ridiculously powerful team. Sokka liked to believe that, that was why their father had been so hellbent on pitting the two against one another. No less, by the time they dragged themselves back to shore the only one still in a hyper mood was the avatar. That night brought another dusting of rain, so instead of sleeping under the stars, Toph crafted a cluster of tents. Granted it had taken a small degree of bribery.

The next day set them back into their regular routine; trek the jungle, hunt, sleep, and resume the hike. This left Sokka with an ample amount of time to quietly reminisce. To look forward at Azula and see how comfortable she had become in conversing with the others. To hear her joke about how Muzuko would be the best man at their wedding. It was just as well for him to notice how Suki had changed. She was speaking of a new relationship with a man named Oato, a man whom TyLee introduced her to. She was very much the same feisty woman he'd fallen for so long ago, but she'd let go of a lot of the stubbornness that made her tricky to work with. In a sense she and Azula had much in common. He considered that, that may have been exactly why the two had clashed in the first place and why they so easily resumed a friendship he thought they'd lost.

The mood grew grimmer, though, when they stood at the entrance of the mountain cave. A host of foul memories resurfaced. Zuko, unaware of just how dismal the cave was, seemed to feed off of this energy and despite his lack of experience, found himself rather reluctant to press forward. Especially when faced with Azula's subtle hesitance. The cave itself took time to navigate. It had changed some since their first encounter with it. The stairs were less stable, making an already tedious task even more so. It helped some that Zuko and Aang could light the way; Aang in the back and Zuko in the front with Azula. Ideally Azula would have been in the middle with her own flame.

Azula still had her uses, however altered the cave was, she navigated it with considerable effortlessness. And when they at last came to the passageway, Sokka took special care not to get himself tangled in the stalactites.

 **.oOo.**

The chamber was wrapped in a daunting hush. Azula took a few careful steps towards the middle of it, her fingers brushing over Sokka's as she released his hand. Her footsteps rebounded off of the walls, intermingling with the rhythmic pulsing of the heart. She let it lure her closer until she was as close as she could manage without falling into the water. As it were the last few times, the water remained undisturbed—a sheet of liquid glass with an otherworldly luminescence. Azula lowered herself. This time she managed a closer inspection of the organ emitting the light. It was a deal larger than she initially thought; and she thought it to be quite enormous the first time she'd seen it. The arrangement of corals and kelps had only doubled since the last time she'd been in its company, perhaps tripled. Along it's array of veins, grew a light fuzz of sea moss. The veins themselves seemed to have grown in some places and eroded in others. Very close to the mass of the heart, she spied a nest of sorts. A place where a fish had chosen to tuck its eggs; the faint red hue of them was wildly overpowered by the heart's on radiance. It was a good ward against predators. She brought her gaze to the surface of the water, her reflection appeared undisturbed by ripples. For a passing few seconds, she could clearly visualize the last version of herself that had been mirrored in those waters. The ravaged, agonized version, Hogoseki had forced her to see. This faded into the foreground of her mind's eye, to be replaced by the sight of herself as she was in present.

A peculiar curiosity overtook Azula, and she indulged it. Removing her top, she dropped herself into the heart pool. Sokka may have spoken some sort of protest, but she was to fixated on her newfound goal. The water lapped against her back, it was hotter than she initially expected, nearly at the temperature of a hot spring. She could almost forget that she was walled into enemy territory and treading in very dangerous waters. Against her better judgement—and it was boundlessly better—she plunged beneath the surface. The heart cast a purple outline over her body, giving her the appearance of a spirit. She sunk lower still, she could now observe a collection of tiny purple quartz fixed into the stone and sparkling the sand below. As she descended the heart's rhythm grew in intensity until she could hear nothing over it's steady pounding.

She dared to brush a hand over the heart. It made sense then, why she couldn't penetrate it. Instead of squishy and venerable flesh, she found her fingers brushing over quite jagged crystal. Crystal that only bore two diagonal gashes. She ran a finger over one of them, before resurfacing for some well needed air. Azula dived back under, unsure of exactly what she was looking for. Perhaps it was the sense of comfort that was slowly setting in. The soft purple haze that once unsettled her beyond all compare, felt rather welcoming…forgiving. Her focus fell on the scratches again—they weren't all that deep, but were very prominent considering how smooth the rest the heart's surface was.

"That was your fault." A harsh voice cut through the serenity, with all of the resentment the heart itself lacked.

Azula found herself choking not just on the fear roused by the voice, but on the reminder of her own wrong doings.

"This is twice that you've come into my cave, after being warned not to. And you have the audacity to swim in my heart pool." His spindly hand came to rise from the sand below. The way the quartz glinted off of his arm reminded her much of the deceiving light of a puffer angelfish. She watched a cloud of sand puff around as he extended his arm. "The first time you chose to test me was a mistake."

The playing field was horrifically uneven, if she opened her mouth to protest it would inevitably fill with water. So she was forced to remain in the silence that seemed to vex Hogoseki so. Or maybe, he'd chosen this time to attack so he _wouldn't_ have to listen to her explanations.

Azula had a vague sense of what was to come. Her lungs were growing uncomfortable—before the interruption she was set on resurfacing. She would still try, but she had a very strong feeling that she wouldn't be permitted.

Regardless she kicked off of the bottom, taking care to avoid the heart or any of its many veins. Not unexpectedly, she felt jagged stone snake around her ankles, dragging her closer to the bottom of the pool. She made a rather sturdy attempt to shake his hand away, but his grip was as firm as the material of his hand. Already her vision was growing fuzzy.

"I see you can move again, not that it's doing you much good." He observed, trailing his other finger over her cheek. He made a point of sweeping it across the scar he'd given her, and with none of the affection Sokka did. "You can move and the first thing you decide to do is walk back here."

How she longed to snap that she had waited somewhere around eight years to do so; eight years of doing various other things. She closed her eyes, pretending that she was floating deep in her dream pool, where breaths still came easy and her crystal pulsed it's vibrant teal-blue. Where Sokka held her hand.

"Was it worth it? Just to irk me?" He rose in full, slouching over her; a dark silhouette with a tangle of seaweed dangling off of his arms. He seemed somehow frailer, as if he were at last crumbling. She was already in as deep as she possibly could be so Azula smirked to herself. If she was going to drown, she was satisfied to do it knowing that he was nearing his end…whatever that meant for a spirit. He had her by the throat, lifting her up some, but taking the care not to raise her above the water. Her hair flowed into her face, obscuring her view. "I knew you would be back, I was waiting." He parted her bangs and fixed his slit eyes on hers, content to watch their light steadily dim. With few other options, she let herself go limp, deciding that it did no good to waste energy that was growing sparse. He tilted her head back up, leaving her to fight to keep her expression wholly passive.

Growing bored with their current state, he dropped the princess, watching her body sink. Starved so completely of oxygen, Azula could feel herself slipping away. Her back found the bottom of the pool, the panic that had swell so big burst open, deflating into the bliss of coming release. She curled her body around the heart, feeling it throb against her ear.

She could see a face some feet away—a waterbender—likely the product of a brain on its last breaths. And yet, the water exploded, tossing her up and to the surface, and to the ground in a slow and graceful, painless arc. She fell into a vicious fit of coughs as she fought to purge the remaining water from her body. In such a desperate state, the face was a miniscule detail left behind in the pool.

"Azula!" Two voices hollered. Sokka and Zuko from the sound of it. She pulled herself upright and looked for the source. Hogoseki had them securely latched onto the wall, all except Aang. The boy had his power to him, but even he couldn't seem to best a spirit. He lie in a heap on the floor, the side of his head well and bloodied. Such would explain Katara's look of absolute horror. Toph was also out cold, her earthbending, a clear threat.

"You're okay." Suki uttered.

"I don't…" Azula panted. "Know if that's…the right…word." She scarcely had time to recover before the ground split open in front of her. From the crack, her nemesis clawed his way up emitting an air of more fury than ever. The heart, she realized, had sided against him. But the heart was no longer a viable alley, being as it was rooted deep within the water. Despite the spirit plunging upon her, Azula stood in full. If she was going to meet her end, she would do it with the dignity she was known for. The dignity that Hogoseki despised to see on her. She met his stare with a snide smile. "Just so we're clear, paying you a visit was a pretty low priority. I'd been thinking about it for a while but other things got in the way."

In place of sheer and raw furry, Azula found a trace of amusement lighting his face. "I gather it's true what is said of firebenders. You can tear their flame right out, but they still have fire." He chuckled. "You are a true delight, princess." His rapid shifts from pure rage to mild entertainment unsettled Azula more than anything about him. "No matter what I do to you, you just don't break, do you? Just when I thought I'd stolen all of your pride…"

Azula interrupted "You'll find that I have an infinite supply, sometimes it just needs time to replenish."

Zuko cringed as the spirit knocked her to the floor. She had only enough time to catch herself, sending a painful vibration up her arm. She heard a soft pop and winced.

"You have an infinite ability to deceive, that's what you have." Hogoseki noted stoically. He clasped his hands behind his back and bent over her. "The truth is, you've lost a good portion of you're pride and you're trying to get it back." He stooped in lower, meeting her at eye level. For a hefty length of time he peered deeply into her eyes. She could smell the eight years he'd spent beneath the water, it wafted off of him potently. He carried the same scent as the seafood that always had her stomach reeling. She fought to keep the nausea at bay. "You're afraid. Small." He elongated himself further, making her feel more so. "I haunt you. And you want to get rid of that." Crumbling and cracking or not, Hogoseki retained the one thing that truly terrified the princess to her core; his uncanny ability to read her. Read her in just the way she had read others. "That's why you're here. Not to get your bending back, a fool's quest that would be. Not that you aren't still on one."

He poised himself to bring his fist down upon her. From the look of it, he would offer a rather crushing blow.

"Perhaps you're right." Azula agreed quietly, still not entirely ready to admit it to everyone else.

He seemed to hesitate. "You confirm so only in the face of death and you expect me to take your word for it?"

Azula shrugged. "I won't need dignity if I'm dead, sounds like a good time to confess."

"You have a reputation for your lies."

"That's correct." Again, Azula agreed. "But you don't want to see the truth when I tell it."

"So pray tell, what is your truth, princess?"

"You would have me dead because I tried to wreck your forest and I'm pure evil. Because I'm incapable of love or something akin to that." She paused. "But I'm not and I can." She held her silence just long enough for it to seep in and just short enough to ensure she wouldn't be cut off. "And I have. I suppose I can be as caring as anyone. Just as well, you don't want to see me that way. But you have seen it. It doesn't matter though, because you need someone to fuel your rage, it's all you have. Without it you'll crumble away. So, go on, ignore what you know is true."

For a grand and fleeting time, she was certain that she had him convinced. That he would let it go…let her go. She could see the tension leave the faces of her companions. But she proved to be every bit as correct in her assessment as he was in his regards to her character. If anything, she'd incensed him on a grander scale. He let a few rocks clatter off of his hand until it was sculpted to an impressive point.

"Don't!" Sokka growled.

"You really are eager to suffer with her, aren't you?" He scowled. "So do it then." He threw Sokka at his feet.

Azula heard Katara scream as her brother crashed to the floor with a sickening thud. "I'm eager to stop you." Sokka persisted.

Hogoseki hissed. "You think you can." He threw his arm down as Azula threw herself in front of the tribesman. The jagged end of the rock jabbed into her middle, grazing the delicate skin beneath. She glared up at the spirit eyes intense with such vicious wrath that it bordered on feral. It stayed only in passing though, before falling away into the familiar helplessness that always came when in the heart chamber. Hogoseki held his weaponized hand there for some time. She watched a bead or two of blood trickle from the nicked skin. She swallowed, a single tear pushed its way through despite how well she fought to keep it from doing so. She let out a shuddering breath, bracing herself for the spirit to ram the sharp rock into her stomach. Sokka gripped her hand harder than he ever had before. This time the stone withdrew altogether, Hogoseki's expression changing considerably. Feeling well and spent, Azula fell back. She could feel a warm trail of crimson dripping in a line over her side. Her relief, however premature, came with a dizzying wave.

"You make things undeniable, princess." Hogoseki noted, "you'd die for him?"

Azula didn't answer, content to feel Sokka squeezing her tightly.

As much as he loathed to admit it, he considered—not for the first time—that he had been sorely mistaken in his treatment of the fire princess. "I'm a spirit of my word." He called back words from a time seemingly so far gone. His tone was smooth and level again. "I must admit, you've exceeded my expectations." There came the sound of rock dragging on rock as he took to pacing about the room as he tried to pick out exactly what it was about her aura that had been altered so drastically. The answer came to him. It, coupled with her willingness to give up all that she had for the Water Tribe human, forced him to admit to himself that he had been wrong. Wrong and blinded by a need to protect what was left of his dear Moaki. Maybe not during their first encounter, but after that…

"Even if I still wanted to kill you, I couldn't possibly."

"Why's that?" She brought herself to ask.

His touch, with the smoother of his hands, was on her belly again. His expression, as limited as it was, became almost tender. He withdrew.

Her hand came to rest where Hogoseki's had been, understanding set in.


	22. A Heart That Found Peace (Epilogue)

With her hand left unmoving, Azula righted herself. She felt tipsy with stress and reprieve, and with a measure of surprise. She supposed that deep down she'd known it for some time between the dizzy spells and the sensitivity among other things. Still she couldn't see herself as a mother. Couldn't quite fathom it.

"So what then, are we free to go?" Sokka asked.

In answer, Hogoseki crumbled the rocks binding the rest of the group. They tumbled to the ground without a hint of grace. He however, still loomed over the pair leaving Azula to feel increasingly unsettled, wondering just how twisted his sense of mercy was.

"We'll show ourselves out." Azula made off to stand up.

"Not yet, you won't." He countered, coming to block her path.

Sokka wrapped his arm protectively around Azula's abdomen, her face paled rapidly as Hogseki's hand snaked out again. She shuddered as his fingers met her forehead. Just like the instances before it, Azula fell back, this time her head hit Sokka's middle instead of the unforgiving cave floor. She was hit with a wave of disorientation. The princess grew increasingly unable to discern what was left and what was right. Up and down became one and the same. Her head lolled back, overcome by a new sort of numbness.

"What are you doing to her?" Sokka scowled. He broke his scowl to check on Azula. She was laying quite still, eyes distant as if she was no longer there at all.

The vertigo gave way to a soothing sense of euphoria. A generous wave of pleasant heat welled in her stomach, ebbing out from her once chilled fire chakra. A tingling sensation worked its way from her middle to the tips of her fingers and toes, and up to her head. The tingles were gentle and a filled in spaces that once felt dead and empty. Azula rolled onto her side, it was a ghost of a motion, one she probably hadn't realized that she had made.

A burst of heat unfolded and coiled up her spine. The golden fingers of warmth fanned out until they trailed over each of her chi points. Leaving her muscles free of strain and her skin feeling as though it had been kissed by the sun. She wore a look of pure bliss.

"Azula?" Sokka's voice cut through.

"Hmm?" She hummed, in a sort of drunk stupor.

He felt as if he should leave her to it but inquired anyhow, "are you alright."

"Splendid, Sokka." Her voice held a dreamy quality, that indicated that she wasn't quite with him. That she was up somewhere on some higher plain. He held lifted her closer to him, initiating within her, a sense of weightlessness. As if she were a part of the breeze and at the same time a single wave in the ocean. And when he set her down it felt as though she'd burst into flames but without the agony of the genuine experience.

The fingers of spirit energy faded into tendrils of steam that curled over her remaining chi points, coaxing each back to life. An inverse of the last experience they'd been exposed to. She gave a soft sight as the last of the blockage seemed to clear away. With the blockage, the steam dissipated leaving her feeling vaguely celestial and with a sense of power she hadn't, until then, known before. It showed very noticeably on her face, accentuating her natural glow. Sokka touched the back of his hand to her cheek, finding that the skin below was hot to the touch. Reassuringly so.

Azula's sense of euphoria swelled and her head was still fuzzy with it, when she came to.

The sound of rock grinding against rock signaled the Hogoseki was bending down. "You came all this way to get your bending back, it would be a shame if you didn't."

Azula's lips parted as she tried to work out what to say. At last she settled for a simple, "why?"

"As I said many a times, I'm a spirit of my word. You found someone to put before yourself; your bending shall be as it was."

She held her hand out, her stomach fluttering with joy as a flash of blue burst from her hand. The feeling of fire in her palm was incomparably sublime. However small the flame was, it was hers. She had missed it so terribly.

"Don't push yourself." The cave guardian cautioned. "If you don't let your chi points settle they may rupture again."

Taking his word for it, she let the flame die out.

The princess found that the cave spirit was just as reluctant to admit his wrongs as she was. Instead of a kind goodbye he spoke, "now, flee my cave before I change my mind again." His words didn't hold the malice they could have.

Sokka helped her to her feet as Hogoseki fused back into the wall of the heart pool. "Got it?" He asked.

"I think so." Azula nodded, truth be told she was still feeling rather misty in consciousness; her senses randomly bombarded by traces of the Spirit World. Her first few steps were clumsy enough for Sokka to decide to toss her arm on his shoulder and escort her to the opening of the passageway.

"I'll go first." Zuko declared, not that anyone wanted to protest.

Azula followed after him.

 **.oOo.**

Sokka's arm was bruised, swollen, and throbbing—likely broken. He was ashamed to have hindered their quick process. After some time he had come to think that it was a wonder he was able to make it out of the cave at all.

Azula's left wrist also seemed puffy, not nearly as terribly as his. He figured that he'd have her it checked out before their ceremony. Other than that, Sokka couldn't discern how she was taking things. Since leaving the cave, she had grown quiet and he couldn't imagine why. He anticipated seeing her in a state of impenetrable thrill now that she had fire dancing in her hands once again. And she was, she seemed absolutely delighted. But standing outside the dark of the cave, this delight seemed somehow subdued. He hoped that it was merely the side effect of the dissolving ecstasy.

For the second time that day he asked her how she was feeling, only to be met with a shrug. "What's wrong?" He tried again.

"Nothing." She replied. "Just thinking."

"Anything good?" Toph asked.

"Yes." She said.

"What are you thinking about?" Sokka pressed. Getting information from her was still like chewing rocks. At times he felt like he'd be able to put a chip in a rock before he got an answer.

This time Azula gave the answer somewhat quickly, setting her hand back on her tummy. Between his broken arm and the return of his bending, he'd nearly forgotten that news. "I'm not the motherly sort. It took me how long to form an attachment to my own mother?"

"Long enough for you to know how important it is to form a bond early on." Sokka set his hand over hers, slowing their strides to a more leisurely pace. "You know to give our child what your parents didn't you."

"Perhaps…" she trailed off. "I'm just glad I chose to come back here when I did. This trip would have never worked if I didn't."

"Yeah, I can't imagine being stuck in that cave with you and your mood swings." Sokka shot her a devious smirk. "They were bad enough before you were pregnant."

"Thanks, Sokka." Azula grumbled, though she couldn't quite dispute the point.

In the night hours, Sokka found himself calculating just how far along his fiancé was. It couldn't have been more than a month or two being as she was still so small. He held her close as they snuggled beneath his sleeping bag. Her breaths fell warmly upon his neck, he was happy to see her resting so well…so untroubled. So free of the nightmares that had disturbed her so. He wove his fingers between hers. For the first time since her initial encounter with Hogoseki she seemed to be truly liberated. His own dreams that night were light and carefree.

 _He and Azula lie in a field beneath a large black pine. A soft breeze wafted about bringing the scent of daisy and other meadow flowers. It fluttered large swatches of white lace. He didn't recall tying them to the tree, but all the same he knew that he and Azula had. The grass rolled like waves. Azula spoke to him but he could hear no sound. She looked up and held her hand out, seeming to marshal the rays of the sun. And then he found himself toppling to the ground, tackled by a giggling child._

The girl's laughter followed him into waking where it blended into Toph's laughter. Azula was already awake and waiting for him to join her. It would seem that even without painful dreams to rouse her, the woman was simply an early riser.

(Wedding)

Sokka could see that Azula was impressed with TyLee's work. It was a true Fire Nation wedding. The scene was every bit as elaborate as he had expected. The woman had lanterns stung in just about every place one could have them strung from. They hung in various hues of orange, yellow, and red, sporting various patterns ranging from dragons to florals. Florals that so rightfully matched the red petals scattered about the jungle floor. Under the lanterns a host of tables were scattered, decorated with tiny gold dragons, coins, and faux rubies. In their absence, the acrobat had acquired enough carpeting to get from where the tables ended to where the alter began.

More impressively was the simple elegance of the alter itself. Within the tangle of mangrove roots, TyLee had lined various candles. She'd set them in every groove and atop every root. He also noticed strands of vines and garlands dangling at the entrance. And where the water met the sand, petals white in color nodded with the waves TyLee had tossed them in.

Sokka could only hope that his appearance was just as upscale. Unused to Fire Nation attire, especially attire of such prestige, he required assistance in adorning himself in his wedding robes. He couldn't name a time where he'd worn such costly material. Over the initial robe, was placed a collar of sorts that flared out in the same way most Fire Nation armor did. For the first time in a long while, he wore his hair down, knowing how well Azula fancied it that way.

From further away he spied the firebender conversing with TyLee. Her hair fashioned into the topknot he was used to, accented by braids he'd never seen on her before that date. All of it held in place by various pins and hair sticks each as sparkling and intricate as the one next to it. She wore a fine garment of white silk, that swept gracefully to the floor. She was the very picture of a Fire Nation bride, save for the accessory fashioned around her neck. The betrothal necklace so heavily contrasted the rest of her outfit—the rest of wedding in general—he was surprised that she hadn't taken it off. On the contrary, she wore it with enthusiasm.

His glance at her met him with a picture of just how grand-scale the event was. In the week or so that they had been gone, their guest list had risen remarkably. Sokka knew that Fire Nation weddings were extensively celebrated, particularly amongst nobility. But it didn't set in until he laid eyes on the sea of people that filled each and every table and the spaces between. He should have expected it considering just how high Azula's status was. And this was just the Fire Nation lot; Sokka had his list of guests. Though smaller, a great deal of people had come from the Water Tribes—Gran Gran among them. Everyone from the Southern Water Tribe—small as it was—seemed to be in attendance. He felt suddenly nervous. Azula, however was very much in her element, back at the center of attention.

Having no father to walk her to the alter, Iroh took on the task. Sokka could see him waiting to preform this duty. Sokka closed his eyes and took a deep breath, he was ready.

 **.oOo.**

From her place upon the alter, Azula could pick out a faint white light among the people gathered. It sifted along weightlessly, weaving in and out of the crowd. Among the situations she considered from a heavy rainfall to her father breaking out of prison just to shout his objections, a ghostly interruption wasn't one of them. The spirit came to stand at the front, now having earned the attention of the rest of the guests. Azula could see it quiet clearly then. He was rather charming, a firebender who looked—despite his true years—to be a few years younger than she. As he drew closer, she came to find that he was a tad smaller in height than she was. And Azula never though herself tall whatsoever. He was also slimmer, that is to say, he bordered on having no weight at all, no muscle. Regardless of his tiny build, he was a being that emitted a powerful light. A soothing light. A being whose eyes glowed a glimmering purple. A shade that had become so familiar to Azula that she couldn't mistake its origin.

What are you doing here?" She questioned.

"I assumed I was invited, seeing as this is my jungle." At this the crowed fell into weary mutters.

"He kind of has a point." Sokka whispered.

Hogoseki took a step forward, as he did so the crowd grew quiet once more. "I'm here to give the two you something. Apology tokens, if you will." He explained. "Both are very precious and I should like you to care for them well." He first unhooked the pendant he wore around his neck. "I my Moaki gave this to me long ago, I loved it as well as I loved her." He fixed the fishbone around Sokka's neck, deciding that it would suit the Water Tribesman well.

And before Azula, he opened his palm. From it, in perfect harmony with the setting sun, sprung a small firelily made of pure amber. "This was my gift to my Moaki. I've always felt closer to her when holding it the way she did."

Azula had a vivid image of the spirit huddled in the corner of his cave cradling the lily, probably after every encounter he had with her, seeking comfort from the crystal flower. She took it carefully into her hands. It was a beautiful thing, he had clearly put much effort into its making.

"That's some apology gift." Sokka mumbled.

"It's wonderful." Azula said.

"I figured that you'd enjoy them. And I know that you will protect them well. I wish you a marriage as happy as mine once was." He left little time for gratefulness as he faded away, leaving Azula to conclude that not only was he a spirit of his word, but a spirit of few words in general. At least when out of his cave.

The gift meant more to her than he would know. It told her once and for all, that she had little to fret over. It brought her deeper serenity and a deeper sense that she was on the right path. The kind of reassurance that she so sought after.

The Fire Sages came to fill Hogoseki's place. She turned to face Sokka.

 **.oOo.**

The more he stared at the princess in her finery, the less she reminded him of Nokao and the more she reminded him of Moaki, his Moaki. At one he understood why Moaki's heart had chosen to save the woman. Her hands interlocked with the hands of the Water Tribesman reminded him so much of his son in those blissful days before Nokao showed her true nature. Between the two was so much compassion, so much care. But for the princess and the tribesman, the feelings were genuine, untainted by a malevolent underlying ulterior motive. Were Nokao seemed to reap and steal everything from her lover, the princess had so much to give. There was a sense of satisfaction in observing her marriage; in a way it seemed to make up for what he couldn't see with his own son.

Hogoseki knew that he had saved her, it was a harsh and agonizing method—needlessly twisted—but the princess had an unbreakable spirit. He had forced her to suffer so endlessly and she was better for it. He could see it in her eyes that she was truly contented. Truly at peace. He regretted some, that he had made the path so difficult for her. But all the same he wondered if she would be as well currently, if he hadn't hurt her so.

He listened to the powerful voice of the Fire Sage as he ran through the vows. The lanterns bobbed about in the breeze, casting the night in a twinkling warm glow. The candles flickered and fluttered upon the tables and within the mangrove. If he didn't know any better, he would say that the mangrove itself was aglow. The balmy wind came again. A fine night for a wedding indeed. And he began to view the princess in a different way entirely; like a child. His child. A poor father he had been to her, but he felt it all the same.

In saving her, he realized, he had saved himself. He was free too; free of the darkness that filtered into his soul, the vengeful wrath that consumed him and free of the stone that bound him to that cave. The stone that pained him for the centuries it had clung to him.

Hogoseki, considered for a moment, staying behind to protect the princess as he had done for his jungle. It didn't take him long to decide against doing so; if she could hold her own against him, she could defend herself.

No, it was his time now.

He watched the tribesman speak his last vow. He watched the princess cup the man's chin in her hand and then press her lips against his. He met her eyes. She smiled at him a look of gratitude with a dash of the pride he had fought so hard to take from her. He realized that this hint of pride was of a more light-hearted playful nature, he supposed it was well to know that he hadn't scarred her to terribly. To know that she didn't resent him for how he'd treated her. It made it that much easier to at last go on his way to meet his wife and boy.

 **.oOo.**

Despite it all, Azula realized that she would actually miss the spirit. She felt for the firelily under the folds of her robes and looked past the mangrove roots, towards the tip of the mountain. The jungle even in the nighttime seemed brighter somehow.

Hogoseki's shackles had been broken, he could finally find his time's end.

And she could truly begin hers.


End file.
